Zack Greinke Will Out-Pitch And Out-Quote You

One of the most underrated stories this baseball season is the dominance of Kansas City Royals pitcher Zack Greinke. Sure, it was the subject of a great JoePo SPORTS ILLUSTRATED cover piece so it’s not exactly a story that’s been ignored. That said, you have to admit that if Greinke-Dink was pitching in a major media market, this kid would be one of ESPN’s daily top stories. Between his pitching dominance and his unique behavior and backstory, his is a story that has media darling written all over it. But even here at SbB, a site whose patriarch who used to work Royals broadcasts, Greinke hasn’t been a huge story.

Zack Greinke

That’s gotta change. Greinke deserves to be a superstar, and we’re not even talking about baseball. If his arm ever goes out, the kid’s got a great future in stand-up comedy. The blog SHAN.BIZ has compiled a list of the greatest Greinke quotes so far (he’s only 25!) and lemme tell ya, folks, Yogi Berra’s got nothing on Zack Greinke.

Our Kansas Jayhawks-loving friends at PHOG.NET brought this list to our attention, and we spent the morning laughing our a$$ off. Some highlights, like the time he was asked about flying cars:

There will definitely be flying cars, but whether there’ll be flying cars for most people to use, it’ll probably take a long time to straighten everything out, all the rules and hassles. It’ll take a while to figure out how to keep people from crashing into each other.

Riiiight. OK, but would you go on a date with Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson? Athletes stick together, right?

No, I’m not a fan of them. We could try to think of someone else we could do it with. But not them.

OK, Zack. Back to baseball. Is baseball hard for you?

Everybody was mad at me. for only throwing fastballs and change-ups. So I threw some first-pitch strikes with curveballs. It?s an easy way to get a strike. It’s not like it’s a real hard pitch to throw. You just throw it for a strike.

Oh, that’s all it takes? Some people think that Greinke’s a space cadet, but we’re pretty sure he knows exactly what he’s saying. He literally just does not care what people think. Greinke also has chimed in on former teammate Jimmy Gobble, his rivalry with the Mexicutioner Joakim Soria, and pretty much every single subject under the sun. The world must know of Zack Greinke’s genius - go forth, blog readers, and preach his greatness!

Added bonus: This just wouldn’t have that SbB special something if I didn’t share with y’all a picture of Greinke’s girlfriend, Emily Kuchar:

Emily Kuchar

Who said weirdos don’t get all the ladies?