Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald Brady’s Kayak

It’s a little ironic after how hard he’s worked to get back onto the playing field, but Tom Brady’s career almost ended the way that so many NFL quarterbacking careers do — by his kayak being capsized in the Charles River. Oh no! Tom! Can you reach this branch?!

Tom Brady

(”Stay alive, no matter what occurs! I will find you!”)

Brady and wife Gisele Bundchen had rented a pair of kayaks for a “leisurely ride on the river” on Sunday when disaster struck, according to the BOSTON HERALD. Exact details are not entirely clear, and won’t be until sometime in the future when the incident is made into a song by Gordon Lightfoot.

The HERALD picks up the story.

“He had to be rescued,” an unidentified spectator told the Boston Herald. “The launch guy went out and got him and got him back in the kayak. He’s been bragging about it ever since. He’s telling everyone he rescued Tom Brady.” 

After Brady suffered the mishap on the rented kayak, a boathouse attendant went out to rescue the quarterback, the Herald said.

“It was more embarrassment than real danger,” the spectator said.

If only Brady had listened when Bill Belichick had tried to teach him the Eskimo Roll.

Eskimo Roll

In a final bit of irony, there is an actual Olympic canoe champion named Tom Brady.

Brady — the football one — didn’t seem too shaken up on Monday when he showed up for a charity golf tournament in Bolton. Evidently he avoided banging his bum knee on a rock or submerged log. The Patriots are still guardedly optimistic about his return for the upcoming season.