Happy birthday, Barry Bonds! Today the Home Run King* turns 44 years old, although most of his current body has only been around for 7 years.

To celebrate Barry’s big day, TIME has compiled “The Evolution of Barry Bonds“, taking you all the way back to 1986 (when the now-unemployed slugger’s 185 pound frame was able to must up 16 home runs in 113 games) up to the 2007 form of Barry (who tips the scales at 228 pounds and has a head that rivals Kim Kardashian’s ass in size).

The biggest year-to-year transformation occurred between 2000 and 2001, where Barry went from 210 lbs. to 228 lbs. Completely unrelated, 2001 was the year Bonds went for 73 home runs, breaking Mark McGwire’s single season record. Don’t bring that up to Mark though, he’s not here to talk about the past.

While Barry owns both the single season and career record for most home runs, he remains unemployed. That is not a result of our staggering economy either - Bonds’ agent has said that the former Giant is willing to pay for the league minimum of $390,000.

ESPN THE MAGAZINE today has compiled a list of players available as the trade deadline approaches, and guess who’s name is on the list - that’s right, the birthday boy:

“If he’s willing to play for league minimum, there’s not a team in baseball that shouldn’t be on this list. But so far, only teams in the DH-league have been rumored, and even then they’ve all been in the AL East: Yankees, Rays, Red Sox and Blue Jays.”

When Barry takes a deep breath and blows out his candles today, he’ll be wishing for a job - or normal sized testicles (I can’t confirm that). The league can’t help with one of those wishes, but the other one is just a phone call away.