Wife Bites Husband Over Florida-Georgia Game

Apparently a gator bites harder than a bulldog. Police say a couple in Neptune Beach (you were expecting anywhere other than northern Florida) got into a fight during Florida’s blowout of Georgia on Saturday. When he got his bags and tried to leave, she did what any self-respecting UF fan would: she bit him. Not gave him the tired old Gator Chomp gesture, but actually bit him. On the freaking thigh.

Veronica Hairston

Veronica Hairston, pictured above with either a bruise or a Gators sticker under her eye (neither would surprise me), then allegedly punched her husband several times and fled from the Days Inn where they were staying. Come for the world’s largest cocktail party! Stay for the world’s funniest domestic abuse! But aside from the physical wounds, Hairston also laid a verbal smackdown on her husband, which was suspiciously omitted from the police report: -Repeatedly insisted that Uga VII was much worse than Uga VI -Teased that Mark Richt is a dead ringer for Helen Hunt -Refused to name their firstborn “Knowshon” But here’s the biggest shocker of all:

Police said both Hairston and her husband appeared to be under the influence of alcohol when the incident took place.