Who Knew A “Harem” Could Heal Shaq’s Bum Hip?

Pat Riley appeared on WAXY-AM in Miami today to say that Shaquille O’Neal is flying to Los Angeles today to have his injured hip examined. The Heat have been an unmitigated disaster this season, and O’Neal’s drop in production is probably most to blame for the club’s appalling performance.

Shaq Kazaam

So O’Neal, who has suffered a major injury every season for nearly a decade, is back on the shelf. Riley though somehow found a way to defend The Big Ingrate: “You know how proud he is? The man? The is absolutely killing him that he’s not out on the court and his team’s not winning. He can’t perform and he’s being second-guessed by everybody at this stage of his career. … He’s one of our great assets. He’s down to 321 pounds … he’s doing everything he can do to get healthy.

It’s understandable that Riley is still trying to pretend that Shaq has some value left in his blubber-ravaged body. He’d love to dump The Big Crispy off on a contending team, unloading the $40M the Heat still owe O’Neal and clearing cap space to start rebuilding. But his claim that O’Neal is doing whatever he can to get healthy is truly a whopper, even for Riley. Witness the juicy, sex-charged item about Shaq in today’s PAGE SIX.

Excerpt from a South Beach source to PAGE SIX today: “He’s (O’Neal) got more women leaving his hotel room than any celebrity I’ve ever seen.”

Shaq Harem

 

By health, perhaps Riles was actually talking about Shaq’s prostate. Sounds like The Big Judas won’t be needing the Flomax anytime soon.