Warning: Matt Millen About To Appear On Your TV

I didn’t watch that much of NBC’s pre-game coverage of the Super Bowl yesterday because frankly, the two weeks of build up to the game was enough for me. I didn’t need another five hours of hearing about how nobody expected the Cardinals to be there, or how Ben Roethlisberger was nervous during his first trip to the Super Bowl against the Seahawks a few years ago. That and I didn’t want to hear Tiki Barber say things like the Cardinals “are a team of density”.

Matt Millen warning

I’m sure a lot of people in Detroit felt the same way, because everywhere they looked there were reminders of how bad the Detroit Lions suck. First of all, they were at a Super Bowl, something the Lions may not even know exists. Then there was Jerome Bettis, who is from Detroit and won a Super Bowl in Detroit, but not for the Lions. Oh, and then there was Matt Millen on the screen every few minutes pretending to know anything about football, when any Lions fan could tell you he clearly doesn’t. Dealing with Millen’s mug on the screen was probably more than any Lions fan could take, so thankfully Detroit’s NBC affiliate made sure to run a warning on the screen whenever he showed up.



Every time a certain familiar face showed up on camera Sunday during NBC’s Super Bowl pregame show, Channel 4 ran a scroll at the bottom of the screen:

“Matt Millen was president of the Lions for the worst eight-year run in the history of the NFL. Knowing his history with the team, is there a credibility issue as he now serves as an analyst for NBC Sports? …”

You can see part of the scroll in the picture above, but if a picture is worth a thousand words then why the hell am I typing this 500 word post watching a video is probably worth like 50 billion, so here you go.

Kudos to NBC Detroit, but couldn’t NBC’s national feed have done something similar for all of us?   Here are some suggestions.

WARNING: John Madden is about to mumble something you already know.

WARNING: Al Michaels‘ sense of self-satisfaction is known to choke small children.

WARNING: Cris Collinsworth apparently has pink eye and it could be contagious through your television screen.

WARNING: Keep any small pets, especially baby seals, away from your television because Mike Holmgren may eat them.

And most importantly…


Any other suggestions?


  1. GravatarAll Washed Up
    4:35 pm on February 2nd, 2009

    WARNING: The Steelers are in the Super Bowl, so expect the Cardinals to be screwed by the refs.

  2. GravatarBermans 222 Dealer
    4:36 pm on February 2nd, 2009

    WARNING: Alex Flanagan's monotone reporting may induce narcolepsy.

  3. GravatarHook Em Horndog
    4:53 pm on February 2nd, 2009

    WARNING: If you lived in Tucson, you'd be watching some great Jenna Jameson porn right now.