Wannabe Rapperess Accuses Shaq of Stalking Her

When someone attempts to take out a restraining order against a celebrity, it’s usually part of some crack pot delusion. (”David Letterman is using secret code to ask me to marry him!”) Celebrities are used to being on the other side of claims of stalking (just ask Michael Jordan). But that’s not the case for Shaquille O’Neal, as the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION reports that a judge has issued a restraining order against him and has ordered him to stay 200 yards away from an alleged former paramour.

Mary Jane

Alexis Miller is a “independent music artist” who records under the name “MaryJane.” (Sadly, she is not one of the Mary Jane Girls.) She claims that after she broke off her relationship with Shaq last month, he became verbally abusive, threatening her in e-mails & phone calls with bodily harm, and saying he would destroy her music career. (And Shaq knows about ruining music careers - just look at his own.)

MaryJane also claims that Shaq would call and just breathe heavily into the phone before hanging up, which having heard enough interviews with him is what I thought he did with everyone. Regardless, the judge found enough evidence to issue a temporary restraining order. TMZ has information from the court documents, including this alleged rhetorical gem from The Big Aristotle: “”I dnt no who the f*** u think u dealin wit u will neva be heard from one phone call is all I gotta make no try me. Sho me.”

The timing of this news is curious, with his reconciliation with his estranged wife Shaunie coming to light just last week. Regardless of the merit of these claims, I would hope that Shaq has a nice, extra-large sized couch to sleep on in his living room tonight.

MaryJane’s MySpace page includes the requisite photos and music samples. Although I don’t claim to be a hip-hop music expert (I stopped listening when 3rd Bass broke up), I think her claim to be the “BEST FEMALE RAPPER ALIVE!” seems dubious at best (rhyming “Kardashian” with “mansion” is a stretch). To summarize by referencing one of her songs: “MaryJane Don’t Stop,” but she apparently wants the court to make Shaq stop.

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