Wanna Gouge iPhone App Users? Call Coach K.!

Joe Ovies at wralsportsfan.com in Raleigh discovers a non sequitur association between Duke hoops coach Mike Krzyzewski and a generic iPhone application selling for $2.99.

Coach K App

(Dragons! Panda Bears! Bill Guthridge!)

Press release for what Krzyzewski licensed his name to:

The Coach K App utilizes innovative multi-touch controls that immerse the player into an exciting series of races against multiple artificial intelligence opponents. The game includes three levels of competition with stops in New York City, China and Durham, North Carolina, home to Coach K’s Duke Blue Devils.

More:

Coach K provides personalized “coaching tips” to maneuver players through a series of dynamic obstacles which come to life through trend-setting graphics. Players also have the ability to customize their avatars.

 Players will be challenged to dodge taxicabs and street vendors, while racing through the streets of New York; avoid dragons and panda bears while speeding along the Great Wall of China; and sprint around campus while avoiding the notorious Cameron Crazies and other obstacles. The game climaxes in an intense head-to-head shooting competition against another player over Bluetooth.

No, this isn’t a joke, as Krzyzewski is also quoted in the release.

Each site on the virtual journey has played a significant role in Coach K’s career. “Beyond the sheer fun and challenge of the game,” Coach K encourages players to “explore and learn about the unique geography and cultures of some of the most interesting cities in the world.” 

Only thing missing in the press release is that Krzyzewski will donate a portion of the sales to charity. (Not even Carolina fans this season.)

The other app credits of Coack K. app game developer Mike Kratzer is a competitive eating contest app game that somehow doesn’t feature Rick Majerus and an app game that features carnival games - with Tim Floyd appearing as a Tilt-O-Whirl ride operator.

Okay, I made the part about Tim Floyd up.

Interestingly, both of Kratzer’s app game efforts without a celebrity endorser go for .99 cents apiece. What’s the odds that Coach K.’s generic game app would go for .99 cents too if he hadn’t been willing to slap his name on the thing?

I realize that I probably wouldn’t be writing this if Krzyzewski sold his name to a brand of beef jerky, but seeing how the price of the generic game was jacked up - compared to the other generic games by the same developer - the whole thing appears unseemly.

Though I do seriously doubt Krzyzewski realizes that the game developer likely tripled the price of the app because the coach lent his name to it. (But if I can find that out in five minutes, where’s Krzyzewski’s agent?)

Carolina fans better damn well have some hacks on the web before the Blue Devils visit the Dean Dome next season.