Chiefs TE Tony Gonzalez still has a step on mere mortals, able to beat them to any spot in any place. That’s fortunate for a southern California man whose life was saved by Gonzalez when the man’s inability to chew properly caused him to choke on a piece of meat in a Huntington Beach, CA, restaurant.

Everyone in the restaurant froze except Gonzalez, who turned turned in his best play of the offseason by administering the Heimlich maneuver on the 45-year-old until the meat extricated itself. (Who said football players couldn’t play both ways? That’s a tackle Deion Sanders would have never completed.)

So is first aid training part of the NFL minicamp program? Not exactly; Gonzalez has never received formal training. “I had seen it done, so I just did it,” stated Gonzalez. We assume he took in multiple viewings of the fine ABC drama “Emergency” in syndication as a child. Man, we could totally intubate our friends as a kid. Neat trick on the playground.

Update (7/8/08 11:30 am ET): Yes, we’re an idiot.