Beckham & Page To Rock London’s Oly Opening

Traditionally, part of the Olympics Closing Ceremonies is given to the country who is going to host the next Olympics, as a way to tell the world what their games are going to be like. Judging by what BBC SPORT is reporting the 2012 London organizers have planned, the message they are trying to get across about their Olympic Games is “totally and utterly insane.”

David Beckham and Jimmy Page

London’s portion will include: David Beckham riding on top of a double decker bus kicking soccer balls into the crowd, Jimmy Page and Leona Lewis performing (perhaps together?), and “hundreds of dancers performing ballet and break-dancing routines.” The whole thing has a loony, surrealistic feel to it, like Fellini directing The Night of 100 Stars with a hint of “Who can we get that doesn’t have anything better to do?”. (Speaking of which, isn’t Beckham, you know, still playing with the Galaxy?) The only thing missing is Prince Charles doing some juggling tricks while Hugh Grant wrestles a bear.

There’s no truth the rumor, however, that Beckham will actually be dueting with Page on an acoustic rendition of “D’yer Mak’er” although there was talk of having Beckham lip-sync along with Page in order to get someone “cuter” than Robert Plant on-stage. Although I think having Queen Elizabeth II parachute into the stadium and shoot T-shirts into the crowd is a nice touch.

In other Ceremony-related news, AOL FANHOUSE has the latest on a leading Chinese dancer who was left paralyzed following an accident in rehearsals for the Opening Ceremonies, including video of her performing. Liu Yan apparently fell 10 feet after a mechanical mishap caused a platform she was jumping on to plunge into a shaft. It’s a horrible story, one that the NEW YORK TIMES reports the Chinese government tried to cover up and certainly far more important than any other Opening Ceremony “scandal”.

Seeing as though we’ve gone from CGI fireworks to lip-syncing to dancers being paralyzed, I’d pretty worried about the safety of riding on top of a double decker bus if I was David Beckham. And if I found out that Posh Spice had taken out a huge life insurance policy that covered “death by falling off of a double decker bus,” I would be very afraid.