TITANS TRAINING CAMP HAS LENDALE SWEATING GRAVY: With NFL training camp in full swing, we thought we’d get our pro football game face on by reliving this epic post by LOSER WITH SOCKS entitled “A Day In The Life Of LenDale White“.
9:00- “Wake up and groggily roll out of bed. Notices the pillow looks eerily like a marshmallow…takes a gigantic bite. Pillow doesn’t taste like a marshmallow.”
9:15- “Has full breakfast of 24 pancakes, 6 scrambled eggs, and 1 pound of bacon.”
9:24- “Takes a massive 2 alarm sh–.”
9:32- “Finds a candy bar wrapper in the trash can…licks off remaining chocolate.”
9:38- “Falls asleep on the toilet.”
10:01- “Attempts to go to the gym but fails to get in the car because the ice cream man drives by.”
10:37- “Stops at McDonald’s for a snack. Cusses out the Drive-Thru attendant because they are no longer serving breakfast. Orders 4 Double-Quarter Pounders and a Diet Coke.”
10:44- “Pulls in front of Davidson County Corrections and heads inside to bail out Pac-Man.”
11:13- “Arrives at Titans’ Practice Facility. Waddles into the locker room. Yanks the hell out of Reynaldo Hill’s dreadlocks and shoves him into a locker.”
11:24- “His daily order of two porterhouse steaks from Demos’ arrives. Challenges Kevin Mawae to a eating contest.”
11:32- “Finishes off the steaks and takes a sh– in Reynaldo Hill’s helmet.”
Oh and there’s more. Much more. If that isn’t the blog post of the year, Tommy Lasorda doesn’t have a long-forgotten copy of “Shaved” magazine stashed under the mattress.