Terry Bowden To Rebowdenize D-I NCAA Football?

If you hadn’t been paying close attention - and we don’t blame you if you hadn’t - Terry Bowden ain’t dead yet, #*%$#@!! Terry was the first member of the vaunted Bobby Bowden family tree to be unceremoniously dismissed from D-I in 1998; brother Jeff left his post as FSU OC during the 2006 season, Tommy Bowden was fired from Clemson halfway through last year, and Bobby will probably be murdered if he tries to come back after this season, so you’d think the sun was setting on the Bowden legacy.

Terry Bowden in Purple

Not so, bitches, not so. Terry Bowden resurfaced this year at Northern Alabama, a Division II school, to about the amount of fanfare you’d expect: a couple wowreallywhatevers and about a week of headlines. Then it’s off to pay more attention to I-A, because come on. Bowden’s on a slower track to success, winning a modest amount of games and oh who are we kidding, he’s tearing D-II up and he’s probably going to be the last Bowden in I-A.

As the FLORENCE TIMES DAILY reports, Bowden’s only focused on winning a championship for now, but…

Terry Bowden’s return to coaching has helped North Alabama to a 9-0 start, a No. 1 ranking and at least a share of the Gulf South Conference football championship.

Bowden has been linked with potential coaching openings at several schools, including Virginia, Memphis and Central Florida.

None of the schools has announced coaching changes, but many sports Web sites are speculating that openings will come at the end of the season. And Bowden’s name has already been mentioned as one of the possible candidates.

“I’m sure my name pops up here and there, and that would have happened regardless just because I got back into coaching. It wouldn’t be happening (now) if we were 5-4, so that’s a credit to our players and coaches that things have worked out so well.”

“I am very happy here at UNA,” he said. “But can anyone say what they would do if they were offered a job that paid a million and a half or two million dollars a year? I want to be here and coach here. If that situation were to come up, then we’ll address it.

Or, in other words, “much as I enjoy making $50,000 a year, I’d kind of prefer something that’s 40 times as much. No offense.”

One school that wasn’t mentioned, tragically, is Florida State. That’s because Jimbo Fisher is contractually guaranteed to have the coaching spot there by 2010; it’s just a matter of time before Bobby Bowden leaves, especially since his career has taken on all the awkwardness of the story Grandpa tells at Christmas that starts to ramble and goes off the tracks for about 20 minutes, but nobody has the heart to tell Grandpa to shut up because it’s Christmas, and so everyone’s just waiting silently except for the really mean relatives who have already walked out so they can bitch about Grandpa and the rest of the family in the kitchen. Or in other words, it’s as strained as this metaphor.

But since Bobby Bowden has already imperiled that 2010 deadline on Fisher’s succession to the program, if FSU’s going to eat that money to keep a Bowden happy, why not let Bobby hand the reins over to his son? Can you imagine the fury, spittle, and outrage that would emanate from Tallahassee? No offense to the Seminole fans among us, but you must admit that it would be one of the five funniest moments in college football history, right up there with when Michigan lost to Appalachian State. Make this happen, Evil Florida State. It would be so worth it.