Taiwan Succumbs To U.S., Sweet Tooth In LLWS

In the end, Chinese Taipei met their doom in the Little League World Series the way that most vanquished teams do — due to Almond M&M’s. California kids know that you don’t pig out on tasty candy until after the game. But Taiwan was cocky, as we see below in this screencap from their dugout, and will pay for it tomorrow morning with nasty sugar hangovers.

Hey, we had to figure out a way to beat these guys, and planting enormous bags of candy in their dugout as as good a strategy as any (also works with Yankees on days that CC Sabathia is pitching). Chula Vista, California 6, Chinese Taipei 3. U.S. wins its fifth straight LLWS title.

Remember when Taiwan used to just toy with us, like the Yankees against the Bad News Bears? They won 17 of 28 LLWS titles between 1969-96, including 10 of 13 from 1969-81. But our side somehow traded Tanner Boyle for the larger Luke Ramirez model, and … what is that American saying about shoes and feet?

Question: Why does 90 percent of the Chula Vista team look older than ROTOWORLD.COM editor Gregg Rosenthal? Well, ours is not to question why, it is only to celebrate Little League’s new world order.