Lobos Football Only Hiring Good-Looking Ladies?

• An ex-University of New Mexico employee sues the football department, claiming that the Lobos are only looking to employ lovely young ladies.

New Mexico is sexy bikini

(“Hey, that bikini is in our school colors! You’re hired!”)

• South Africa can’t seem to give World Cup tickets away, but they’re going to try anyway.

• Washington Nationals broadcasters take some on-air time lambasting Scott Boras and his high-priced client, Stephen Strasburg.

• Speaking of D.C., Redskins backup QB Colt Brennan denies hooking up with Jessica Simpson. Hope you enjoyed your 15 minutes, Colt.

Brendan Haywood doesn’t think much of Stephon Marbury’s latest online entertainment, but does think he might be gay.

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South African Welfare Now Includes World Cup Tix

For the past couple years, the Republic of South Africa has been loudly proclaiming that the 2010 World Cup is going to be a smashing success, that their country will have no problems hosting the world’s largest sporting event, and that everything is going perfectly according to plan. The one thing they forgot, though, is that they have a free press and that the rest of the world has access to things like the Internet.

FIFA 2010 World Cup South Africa

But you’ve gotta give South Africa credit for being creative. They’ve averted strikes and other potentially disastrous events so far, and now they’ve gotten creative about their lack of ticket sales as well, giving away thousands of tickets to impoverished South Africans.

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Brits & Russians Agree: Soccer Needs More Booze

Beer: It improves appearances, settles racial disputes, soothes what pains us and helps wash down otherwise unpalatable meals. It’s powers are mysterious and great, but can even beer do the seemingly impossible? Can it make Americans like pro soccer? England’s Steven Thompson says yes.

Steven Thompson

The Burnley forward was in Portland as his Premiership team played the (soon to be) MLS Portland Timbers on Sunday at PG&E Park, and struck a blow for soccer detente — even though it cost him dearly. At one point during play Thompson tumbled into the Timbers’ beer garden, which is right next to the field. Finding himself practically in the lap of a drinking patron — and being British — he picked up the man’s mug and took a giant swig.  Then, back into action!

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USA: “Can We Watch USA-Mexico?” NBC: “Que?”

With the USMNT’s highly improbable run in last month’s Confederations Cup in South Africa, interest has ramped up in America for the 2010 World Cup. Now all of a sudden, people know of more players on the team than just Landon Donovan - even if it’s just to yell “WHERE THE HELL WAS DEMPSEY?” at the television in order to give the (false) impression that you have a clue what’s going on.

Clint Dempsey Landon Donovan
(Success for the national team? Who the hell would want to watch that?)

So with a critical World Cup qualifier with rivals Mexico coming up next month, it stands to reason that rights-holders NBC would want to put the game on as many television sets in the US as possible. But, um, about that… hope you like Telemundo!

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2010 World Cup Imperiled By Construction Strikes

There’s long been concern that the 2010 World Cup may not exactly go smoothly down in South Africa. You’d want and hope for better things to usher in the first sub-Saharan World Cup, and the recent Confederations Cup seemed to be a marked step in the right direction. Well, aside from the vuvuzelas.

Vuvuzelas
(On the plus side, anything to cut down on the use of these beehorns is an undebatably positive step.)

But even as fears began to subside and optimism returned to the Cup, workers at the various stadia being built groused about low pay, often in direct violation of South African minimum wage (there’s that corruption cropping up again). Now, they’ve gone on strike, directly jeopardizing the country’s ability to host the tournament that looms just 11 months away.

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Robbed Egyptian Team Cleaned Out by Hookers?

When the Egyptian soccer team lost $2,400 dollars from a few players’ rooms in South Africa a couple days ago, the head of Egypt’s delegation was unusually quick to lay the blame on the players themselves and not on the host country of the Confederations Cup: “There was some negligence on the players’ part, leaving the money in drawers, and they’ll be getting firm instructions for next time.”

Howard Webb and Egypt player

(”Now go back to your room with no prostitutes!”)

Now we may know why: the players might have been getting firm instructions from prostitutes hired after their tremendous upset win over powerhouse Italy and left their drawers down while the female sex workers made off with their cash in a robbery.  Well, that’s better; it’s not a security problem but an entirely different kind of crime.  See you next year, World Cup fans; bring extra cash for our hookers to steal from you!

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Egypt Wins Match, Loses $2,400 In Stolen Cash

Congratulations to Egypt, who pulled off the shock of the Confederations Cup in South Africa yesterday by beating current world champions Italy 1-0 in a group stage match. It was an historic win for Egypt specifically and African soccer in general, as the victory proved that teams from Africa can compete with - and beat - the best teams in the world.

Egypt soccer team

But despite the result, five unnamed members of the Egyptian national team were pretty big losers yesterday. Why? Because as the BBC reports, they had their hotel robbed and about $2,400 in cash stolen while they were playing in the biggest match of their lives. Whoops! Looks like South African officials still have a few kinks to work out before they host the World Cup next year.

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Albanian Fans Crown Cristiano Miss World 2010

With all the hot ‘n’ heavy activity of today’s World Cup qualifying matches, fans in Albania took the time to select their favorite to be named Miss World 2010. And the winner is… Cristiano Ronaldo!

Cristiano Ronaldo Miss World

DIRTY TACKLE delivers the awesome above pic, as the crowd held up the beauty pageant banner during Albania’s 2-1 home loss to Portugal. The home country may have lost the game, but they certainly won a few worldwide laughs.

The Albanians sure know beauty when they see it, as they must have been smitten with Ronaldo’s previous pretty pink hat & pearls ensemble. This has to be the most exciting moment in Cristiano’s career since his girlfriend was caught taking naked pictures of herself in a women’s restroom.

But really - how does Cristiano compare to other Albanian beauty pageant contestants? Let’s take a look at some of his potential competition, shall we?

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Speed Read: Is Brodeur The Greatest Goalie Ever?

It’s hard at this moment to put into perspective what Martin Brodeur accomplished last night by becoming the NHL’s all-time leader in wins as a goaltender. For one, there’s no such thing as a tie anymore and Marty has had his share of shootout wins over the past few seasons. But it’s clear that this is a big deal, especially since Brodeur — a Montreal native — passed his childhood idol Patrick Roy to get the record.

Martin Brodeur

(Would you know this was one of the 10 best hockey players of all time if you saw him walking down the street?)

But just think how huge the celebration of this record would have been if Brodeur had played his entire career just 5 1/2 miles east of at Madison Square Garden instead of at the afterthought that is the Meadowlands (and if he had led the Blueshirts to three Stanley Cups instead of the Devils. And yes, I know the Devils play in Newark now, but that’s only been a little over a year). As someone who’s lived in New York, I know firsthand that those 5 1/2 miles might as well be 500 miles, considering how little attention is paid to the Devils and Nets in the city.

That’s not a knock on the Devils’ franchise, which has quite clearly been superior to the Rangers for 15 years now, mostly because of Brodeur.  It’s just that he’s never really been a superstar — that guy who’s a must-see along the lines of Gretzky, Lemieux, Roy, Ovechkin, Crosby, and any number of other guys who draws huge crowds wherever they go. And that’s largely because he’s been fairly anonymous despite playing in the largest market in the NHL. He’s never even filled his own building on a regular basis. Heck, you can count the number of Devils sellout crowds on one hand most years. They can’t even pack their barn for playoff games. I bought tickets to a 2003 Stanley Cup Finals game the day before from Ticketmaster.

When Brodeur retires with what will likely be many more wins (100 more? 200?) than Roy, he will have set a bar that may never be topped. But will he be remembered as fondly as the NHL’s other greats? Personally, as a hockey fan, I kind of a agree with this guy:

Roy fan taunts Brodeur

I think Brodeur is a great technical goaltender who’s been fortunate to be able to play at high level for many years. But he always has had a great defensive team in front of him — something many other great goaltenders like Dominik Hasek and Ed Belfour were not blessed with on a regular basis. But for my money, but Roy is still the best I’ve ever seen.

Do you have WBC fever yet? Do you know it’s even happening? As if we needed further evidence that America’s attention is squarely on college basketball this month, America’s scintillating 9th-inning comeback victory over Puerto Rico last night — which avenged P.R.’s 11-1 mercy-rule win over the U.S. a few days ago and sent the Americans into the semifinals — was seen by an announced crowd of just over 13,000 at Dolphins Stadium in Miami. To put it into perspective, the Korea-Japan game in San Diego drew more than 15,000. To recap: it’s our national pastime, in our country, playing against an American territory with a large population in the Miami area, and we couldn’t outdraw the Korea-Japan game. The U.S. team is now apparently taking this all very seriously, after nearly deciding to drop out of the tournament because too many people were getting hurt. I’m going to put the probability at about 98% that this is the last World Baseball Classic.

As it happened, though, it was a great game. Shane Victorino drew the ire of the Puerto Ricans in the 7th inning when he “accidentally” deflected a ball thrown in from the outfield while he was running the bases, allowing him to take an extra base. If the game wasn’t close, he likely would’ve taken one off his ear flap the next time up. Puerto Rico had a 5-3 lead going into the bottom of the 9th, but the U.S. rallied, culminating in David Wright’s 2-run single that won it, setting off a genuinely boisterous celebration.

WBC celebration

The NIT started last night with eight matchups, and “snubbed” teams like San Diego State and Saint Mary’s came through with victories. Stephen Curry did his usual thing, scoring 32 as Davidson won at South Carolina. Meanwhile, only 2,039 people bothered to show up in South Bend to see Notre Dame beat UAB. Kentucky played its first game at Lexington’s Memorial Coliseum since 1976 because Rupp Arena had a scheduling conflict, and the Wildcats downed UNLV in front of a sell-out crowd.

Stephen Curry

(Steph’s team wouldn’t make an NCAA run this year, so isn’t it better that we might see him take the NIT crown?)

• Should the Astros follow up their signing of Pudge Rodriguez with Pedro Martinez? Some commenters on BASEBALL PROSPECTUS think it’s all crazy enough to work, but BP’s Will Carroll is just shaking his head at Ed Wade (who says the team has had no conversations with Pedro, for what it’s worth).

Oh, God. Yes, that’s A-Rod making out with himself:

Alex Rodriguez making out with himself

Morehead State beat Alabama State in the game the NCAA refuses to call the “play-in” game.  Their reward? A beatdown by Louisville on Friday. In fact, the Cards beat Morehead 79-41 earlier this season, so expect the line to be set somewhere around 38 on this one. The tragedy in all of this? No more chances to see Grlenntys Chief Kickingstallionsims, Jr. play.

• According to MLIVE, players for the Lions are no longer permitted to talk to the media unless it’s been cleared with the team’s media relations department first. Because if there’s any organization that has a pristine reputation to uphold, it’s the Detroit Lions.

• Florida State president T.K. Wetherell kinda lost it in a press conference yesterday, so says the ORLANDO SENTINEL. First, he referred to Bobby Bowden’s first school (Samford) as a “dipsh*t school,” then he outlined a hypothetical way that the ‘Noles could beat Florida, which includes a frighteningly well-thought-out fraud scheme involving Tim Tebow and fake schoolwork submitted in his name.

• PASSION AND PRIDE cautions against Phillies fans panicking about Cole Hamels‘ injury. It looks like he has no structural damage to his elbow, but still. 260 innings last year.

• ROYALS REVIEW warns against a cheeseburger shortage in KC, with Billy Butler and Sidney Ponson now both in town (and isn’t Ponson just the perfect Royals guy?)

Sidney Ponson cheeseburgers

Steve Nash is really excited that Vancouver’s going to get an MLS team, as his Twitter feed indicates. With the rate the MLS is expanding, Nash will probably be playing for them after his deal with the Suns expires.  So now the MLS has two Canadian teams. It’s all part of a master plan to start gradually putting MLS teams in other countries. The league clearly believes it’s about time that the rest of the world gets some exposure to soccer.

• Speaking of soccer, it’s time to bid for the 2018 and 2022 World Cups! The frontrunner? Gotta be Qatar.

• The AP reports that two sled dogs died in the Iditarod yesterday. Their hometown? Wasilla. The cause of death is unknown, but it probably has to do with running in the snow in ridiculously freezing weather.

If you needed to win one hockey game, who would be your goalie?

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Of Soccer, Radio Shack, & Mexican Voodoo Dolls

There are many reasons for and against closing the prison at Guantánamo Bay. But what concerns me most is where we will put the real traitors, like Radio Shack.

Voodoo Doll

The fifth column of consumer electronics was taking part in a promotion in Mexico, offering fans voodoo dolls of US National Team players in advance of this month’s US-Mexico World Cup qualifier.

I understand that Mexico would need to turn to black magic to reverse their 9-year losing streak against us, but why does it have to be sponsored by the place I overpaid for my phone charger?

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