Some Jockeys Just Don’t Know How To Cheat Well

America is a country founded on the Protestant work ethic. Australia is a slapdash nation thrown together by a bunch of convicts. The Whizzinator was a model of ingenuity, where form meets function in a stylish, secretive way to pass drug tests. In Australia, they just give you a urine-filled condom and a sharpened lollipop stick.

Jockeys

A jockey was suspended from the sport for his attempt to help a friend pass her drug test. And while he had a lot of heart, he didn’t have an awful lot of creativity. Also, when you go to the store and buy only a lollipop and a condom, they usually call the cops on you.

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Knoxville’s Newest Trim Is Bruce Pearl’s Ex-Wife

• The ex-wife of Bruce Pearl puts her alimony money to amusing use.

Kim Shrigley Bruce Pearl Alimony'

LeBron James receives a Madison Square Garden reception fit for a king.

Brian Urlacher dresses his kid in pink diapers & blue nail polish.

• Giants kicker wants the President to pardon his pot-peddling brother.

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