Rich Rodriguez has been a godsend for lowly sports bloggers since he decided to leave one industrial state in decline for another industrial state in decline with deeper pockets.  He threw West Virginia under the bus, the dump truck, the snow plow, and some kind of machinery that even the University of West Virginia’s president didn’t think he was smart enough to operate.

It only seems fair now to check in on his first game as the head coach of the University of Michigan.  After all, we should judge the man on his results and not on the hullabaloo surrounding him since his inglorious departure.  So let’s just check in on how he did against Utah… oh, really?  25-23 loss?  Impotent offense?  Loose defense?  Quarterback controversy?

We love you, Rich Rodriguez of the University of RichRod.  Please don’t ever change.
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University of Michigan head coach Rich Rodriguez continues to show the judgment usually associated with road kill as he allows his name to be battered about in a civil lawsuit regarding his departure from WVU. (Or, as we call it, “the gift that keeps on giving“.)

(Winner!)

This week, we find out that Captain Savvy took time out from his busy schedule pulling together a staff at Michigan and building relationships to chat with Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops a few days before the Fiesta Bowl this year. How generous of his time, right? How thoughtful, no? How… who was Oklahoma’s opponent in the Fiesta Bowl? West Virginia?

Oh, Richie Rod, don’t ever change. You’re the best!

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Rich Rodriguez, who we assume is renting and not buying in Ann Arbor, has slowly been learning why the legal system calls the research phase of a trial the “discovery process”: we’re all discovering how refreshing he would be as a women’s cleansing product.

Now the discovery process has unearthed that Rodriguez sent a go-between to University of Michigan officials to tell them how much he always liked them but couldn’t say so because he was with a girl at the time but now he thinks the two of them may not be compatible anymore because she wants more kids and he just needs time to work things out, y’know?

Now we’re getting that not-so-fresh feeling.

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Rich Rodriguez has done his level best to tamp down exuberance for his new Michigan wards. He told ESPN’s Ivan Maisel that he’s “anticipating the worst” in year one as the team learns his brilliant system. Also, the grinding conditioning program needs time to soak in. And so on. It’s college football’s version of the “he lost 20 pounds and looks great on the mound this spring” piece.

(This will distract Michigan students for only so long)

Of course, Rodriguez doesn’t have too much time; 9-4 may have been a fine farewell for Lloyd Carr, but it’s unacceptable to Big House denizens. Perhaps he can buy time while he attempts to build a team modeled in his image, full of fast-twitch muscles and constant movement. If only there was some way to convince fans to be patient… hmm…

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