Twitter is all the rage these days with NBA players. Shaq lets you know when he’s going to be at a diner, and Steve Nash likes to broadcast MLS news. It’s gotten to the point that the Bucks’ Charlie Villanueva recently got in trouble for “tweeting” from the locker room at halftime of the team’s game with the Celtics. So someone at the DESERET NEWS in Utah thought they’d ask Jazz coach Jerry Sloan what he thought of the new trend.

Unfortunately, Sloan seems to have been raised in the same log cabin as Abraham Lincoln, and reacted to the question like Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer from those old SNL skits.

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If you saw the recent Casino Royale - so much better than Quantum of Solace - this story will sound eerily familiar: A broker (possibly with an eye that cries blood) takes his client’s money and invests it in a few high-risk ventures, despite his client urging him to “keep it conservative”. The risks don’t exactly go as planned, and he loses a vast portion of his client’s money. In this case, however, instead of a machete-wielding African mercenary, the client in question is everyone’s favorite World Series announcer, Tim McCarver.

(Ruh Roh!)

A decent sum of money it was, too; McCarver reportedly lost about a cool million bucks on poor investments. And now he’s taking his broker, Morgan Keegan & Co., to court for “allegedly misleading him on just where his money was invested.” Even better, McCarver’s lawyer, Dale Ledbetter, is using the old Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer defense.

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