• We shake our pom-poms in salute to those hard-working, fast-moving, good-looking San Diego Charger Girls.
• The Chicago Bears are still alive, thanks to Brian Urlacher using his head.
• A Toronto Blue Jays choreographer is in trouble after admitting to dancing between the sheets with a 15-year-old bird.
• The perfect holiday gift for the righteous God-fearing hunter in your life: A camouflaged bible.
Tags: Brian Urlacher
, Camouflage Bible
, Charger Girls
, Chicago Bears
, Los Angeles Clippers
, Mark Teixeira
, New York Yankees
, San Diego Chargers
, Soccer Porn
, Toronto Blue Jays
, Transgender Golfers
This story comes straight from the “Juwanna Mann” file (we can’t believe we’re citing the Wayans brothers in a joke, either), but unlike the farcical athletic adventures of cinematic men in drag, this tale isn’t tall at all. Well, it is tall, but it’s literally tall, not figuratively. Oh, you get the picture. According to James Achenbach of GOLFWEEK, via FOXSPORTS, the winner of the 2008 RE/MAX World Long Drive Championship Ladies division is a 55-year old bartender who used to be a man.
(Your 2008 Women’s Long Dri … wait! That can’t be a woman!)
That’s right, Palm Springs, CA, native Lana Lawless (no relation to Lucy … allegedly. Lawless claims to have taken the name from movie star Lana Turner) won the contest by upsetting a 21-year-old New Zealand native largely accepted as the event’s prohibitive favorite, Phillis Meti. She did it by smashing a ball 254 yards into a stiff headwind on a course in Mesquite, NV, and then promptly admitting that her physique was, well, not entirely a “God original”.