Michael Vick Allowed To Resume His NFL Career

T.O.’s Twitter-based lobbying must have worked, as Michael Vick has been reinstated into the NFL - if any team wants him.

Michael Vick dog

O.J. Simpson is having a swell time in prison - except that he thinks his cellmate is ready to kill him.

• While the real Canadian Open gets washed out, Canadian soldiers hold their own golf tournament in sunny Afghanistan.

Hank Aaron wants steroid “cheaters” out of the Hall of Fame, but wants Pete Rose in.

Michael Strahan’s new Fox sitcom looks terrific - terrifically bad.

Read more…

Mets’ Front Office Turning Into Total Horror Show

How bad must things be going when your team has the second-highest payroll in Major League Baseball, but is five games below .500, totally out of playoff contention, and that’s not the bad part?

Omar Minaya, Tony Bernazard
(”Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Tony?” “Sure, Omar, but where am I going to find a used Panzer tank in Queens this late?”)

Moreover, how bad must things be going when your VP of Player Development, Tony Bernazard, is fired in the middle of the season for tyrannical, shirtless rants against players in the major and minor leagues… and that’s not the bad part either?

Welcome to The Season of Pain, starring the 2009 New York Mets.

Read more…

Week In Review: Witt Wants Winter Games in Ger.

• We’re keeping abreast of ex-figure skating champ Katarina Witt’s efforts to bring the 2018 Winter Olympics to Munich.

Katarina Witt

The IOC would have to be a bunch of boobs not to hear her out.

• New blood tests reveal that Steve McNair was probably passed out drunk when he was shot & killed by Sahel Kazemi.

• Can’t Michael Jordan go throught at least one round of golf without being bothered by a giant inflatable penis?

• Secret video of Jordan Crawford dunking on LeBron James is finally released - in two versions, even! The final review: Meh.

• ESPN doesn’t feel like making news about the rape allegations aimed at Ben Roethlisberger. Why not? The accuser seems newsworthy enough.

Read more…

Mets’ Player VP Will Take On All You Candyasses

As VP of player development, it’s Tony Bernazard’s job to make sure the Mets organization gets the most out of its minor league prospects. So to make sure the troops are properly motivated, occasionally butts have to be kicked; and as we all know, there is no more effective way to make your point than to remove articles of clothing and challenge people to a fight.

Tony Bernazard

The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS is reporting today that Bernazard, a former Major League infielder who played 10 seasons with six teams, unleashed a foul-mouthed tirade in the Binghamton Mets (Double-A) locker room recently, at one point removing his shirt and challenging the team to fight him. It’s called the Mike Singletary method, I believe. Read more…