Former Auburn Coordinator: “All They Do Is Pray”

David Cross once said, “The South has a certain kind of ignorance that is deeper and truer, more unwavering and steadfast in ignorance than the rest of the country has. And just for a lack of a better term, let’s call it Southern Baptist.” While we’d never criticize another man’s religion - if God tells you to do something, y’know, you do it - there’s few places where the Southern Baptists roll thicker than Alabama.

Jay Jacobs Auburn
(”‘Forever and ever, Amen.’ Very good. Now, let us pray.”)

That, then, takes us to Auburn, the scene of much tumult over the last year or so. Before Gene Chizik nearly caused a riot by taking the reins of the program, there was another controversial addition to the coaching staff: offensive coordinator Tony Franklin. Franklin was tasked with bringing the spread to the Auburn offense, a move that failed so spectacularly that he was canned seven games into his Auburn career. Franklin finally talked about his time there to the MONTGOMERY ADVERTISER, and sweet bearded Moses, do they ever like to prayRead more…

Auburn Hires Coach With Worst Record In Big XII

When Auburn head coach Tommy Tuberville “resigned” last week under extreme pressure from school officials, one would imagine that the Auburn athletic department had a plan in place to go forward. Perhaps a list of potential candidates with a can’t-miss option or two. Really, the one thing you want to avoid at all costs is a coach who’s noticeably worse than the one being replaced. Like, oh, I don’t know… ISU’s Gene Chizik.

Chizik Nickel
(Good news: His buyout is payable in Chizik nickels.)

Yes, according to CYCLONEREPORT.COM, the Iowa State affiliate of RIVALS.COM, Gene Chizik will be the Tigers’ next coach. Chizik, mind you, went 2-10 last season at ISU, including a perfect-in-its-own-lousy-way 0-8 in Big XII play. That pushed his career record to 5-19, which has got to be one of the worst NCAA marks in decades. And Auburn freaking hired him.

But was the biggest salesman in this deal Iowa State’s own athletic director? Read more…

Speed Read: Hamels Calls Mets “Choke Artists”

World Series MVP Cole Hamels is currently doing some radio promotion for the Phillies championship DVD. But what the heck was he doing on New York’s WFAN yesterday? There’s no city that’s more excited about buying a Phillies DVD. Anyway, during the interview, Hamels was asked whether or not the Mets are “choke artists” for their last two September collapses. Hamels, of course, said “no, they’re a very good team and things just didn’t work out for them in the end. They’ll be tough to beat next year.”

Cole Hamels

Oh, he didn’t say that? Oh, wow. This is what he actually said (via SILIVE.COM):

“Last year and this year I think we did believe that [they were choke artists],” he said. “Three years ago we didn’t because they smoked everybody, and I think we all thought they were going to win it all. Unfortunately that didn’t happen. But, yeah, that’s kind of what we believed and I think we’re always going to believe that until they prove us wrong.

Ouch. Hamels also relayed this anecdote:

He also said that the rumor that the Phillies hung a photo of Jose Reyes on Shane Victorino’s locker after he celebrated a little too much after a home run in the NLDS against CC Sabathia of the Brewers is true.

“Hey Shane, this doesn’t win the game, there’s still a lot of game to play. Why are you trying to be like Jose Reyes? Even though you hit a big home run you don’t need to pimp it,” he said.

This rivalry’s never been friendlier.

Jose Reyes

(Is this excessive for celebrating a 6-4-3 in an April game against the Nats?)

In last night’s NFL game nobody saw, the Bears kept their division hopes alive by beating the Saints 27-24 in overtime. The Bears let a 21-7 lead get away in the second half. The Saints actually took a 24-21 lead late in the 4th, but the Bears got a game-tying field goal from Robbie Gould at the end of regulation, and a game-winner on the first possession of overtime. The Bears are 1/2 game behind the Vikings, and Minnesota owns the tiebreaker. But the Vikings have to play Arizona, Atlanta, and the Giants to end the season while the Bears get the Packers and Texans. New Orleans is now almost certainly out of the playoff picture with the loss.

Robbie Gould

(Gould’s neckbeard is unimpressive)

We don’t do a lot of hockey recaps here, but good lord Islanders, please stop somebody. The Isles were pounded 9-2 by Pittsburgh last night, even drawing the embarrassing “We want 10! We want 10!” chant from the Igloo crowd in the 3rd period. The Isles are now tied with Tampa Bay and Atlanta at the bottom of the league.

Speaking of the Lightning, let’s start there in the links:

• The ST. PETERSBURG TIMES has more on the continuing war of words between Barry Melrose and Lightning owner Len Barrie. Wonder how Melrose is going to act when Tampa Bay is brought up during his TV appearances on ESPN, considering he’s already said he hopes they never win another game.

Larry Brown welcomes Boris Diaw and Raja Bell aboard by informing them that the Bobcats suck (via NESW SPORTS):

• NEWSDAY says Manny Ramirez is sad because nobody wants to sign him, and is threatening to retire. Not surprisingly Manny is spending his off season “working out, watching cartoons and playing video games.” Give that man $25 million a year!

• Syracuse has hired Saints offensive coordinator Doug Marrone to be their new head coach. Marrone has never been a head coach at any level. COLLEGE FOOTBALL TALK has the details.

• THE AUBURN BEAT has the full text of Tommy Tuberville’s resignation letter. Apparently, he’s getting more than $5 million to quit his job.

• According to BUCS BEAT, Jeff Garcia’s calf injury isn’t getting any better and he might not play this Sunday. That leaves you with Luke McCown, Bucs fans.

• Chicago Bulls “Luvabull” Ashley Bond is this year’s Miss Illinois USA, taking over the title from fellow Luvabull Shannon Lersch. WITH LEATHER provides the story and the photo:

Luvabulls

Terrell Owens is back on the crazy train again. Now, it seems as if he’s jealous of the relationship between Tony Romo and Jason Witten. FANHOUSE breaks down the insanity.

• You don’t see many NEW YORKER links on SbB, but if you have the mental capacity and about an hour and a half on your hands, read Malcolm Gladwell’s take on Chase Daniel’s chance for success at the next level. It’s just a tad deeper than what you’ll hear from Mel Kiper.

• SOX AND DAWGS has a look at the new Red Sox uniforms for 2009. They’re finally jumping on the alternate logo/alternate jersey bandwagon. Here’s the new road jersey:

Red Sox new jersey

Who ya got in the 2009 NL East?

View Results

Coaches’ Wives Call In To Complain About Auburn

As you’re probably aware by now, Tommy Tuberville was unceremoniously canned by Auburn administratorsresigned” Wednesday, right on the heels of a positively horrific 2008 campaign. With his departure went his assistants’ jobs, but according to wives of two of those assistants, they were never informed by Auburn, finding out only through the press.

Tuberville phone
(”Hey, you know that recruiting trip I sent you on? Things seem to have changed a bit.”)

This bombshell of shocking d*ckitude comes not from anonymous sources and newspaper columns, but from the wives themselves, live on the air with Bill & Dan from SPORTS CALL on 93.9 in Auburn.

Read more…

WTF: Auburn Fires Tuberville, Petrino Contacted?

Not exactly a shocker, but the BIRMINGHAM NEWS reports this afternoon that Tommy Tuberville is out as Auburn coach.

Bobby Petrino Tommy Tuberville

No other details are forthcoming, except that the announcement could come today.

The News also reports on possible replacements, which somehow, SOME WAY include Bobby Petrino. Read more…

Blog-A-Roni: NBA Outdoor Game A Cold War Affair

• Brett Edwards of AOL FANHOUSE gets chills watching Saturday night’s cold & windy Suns-Nuggets outdoor NBA game.

NBA Outdoor Game

• REAR NAKED NEWS punches up a clip of Rampage Jackson’s big screen debut - heading straight to a DVD near you.

• WALKOFF WALK finds L.A. columnists T.J. Simers and Bill Plaschke taking alternate routes in directing their anger at the Dodgers’ NLCS woes.

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS hikes up Tennessee’s only good highlight from their weekend loss to Georgia - the Vols’ Eric Berry flattening Bulldogs RB Knowshon Moreno.

Read more…

College FB Coaches To Visit Troops In Middle East

The COLUMBUS (GA) LEDGER-ENQUIRER ten-huts, as five college football coaches will be making a special trip to visit recruits - of the Armed Forces.

college football coaches visitng troops in Middle East

Georgia’s Mark Richt, Auburn’s Tommy Tuberville, Notre Dame’s Charlie Weis, Miami’s Randy Shannon, and Yale’s Jack Siedlecki will be meeting & greeting with troops stationed in the Middle East.

Read more…

Jim Grobe 3rd Coach To Give Arkansas Job The Brush-Off

WAKE’S GROBE 3RD STRAIGHT COACH TO CALL OFF HOGS: After going through a pair of orange Tigers for their head coaching job, Arkansas was zeroing in on a Demon Deacon. Now the Razorbacks are just back at ground zero.

Arkansas Razorback figurines

The NORTHWEST ARKANSAS MORNING NEWS reports that Wake Forest’s Jim Grobe decided to stay in Winston-Salem, rather than flee for Fayetteville.It’s the 2nd ACC coach this week to say no to the Hogs - as Tommy Bowden re-upped with Clemson - and the 3rd coach overall to take himself out of the Razorbacks’ running - as Tommy Tuberville chose to stick with Auburn.

Houston Nutt streak

What’s with all the rejection? It’s not like any new coach would have to deal with any ridiculous situations.RAZORBACK EXPATS tries to explain the latest spurning, with their five reasons why Grobe didn’t take the job:

Houston Nutt banner 0-2

For example, Reason #2: “Was promised that his name would be displayed on banners all over the state…then he found out what that meant.”

Tommy Bowden Turns Down Arkansas Football Coaching Job

ARKANSAS GETTING COACHES PAID ALL OVER THE PLACE: First we reported last week that Tommy Tuberville was tangoing with Arkansas about its football coaching vacancy, and now Tommy Bowden of Clemson has held his school hostage received a contract extension after the Razorbacks expressed interest in his services.

Arkansas Razorbacks Fans

This is yet another example of a coachless mid-level BCS program pretending to be big time and getting out over its skis in the types of coaches that it pursues. Arkansas isn’t going to lure a big name unless there is some sort of pox attached (Franchione) so the Hogs may as well do their homework and search out a top coach from a lower level school (Peterson) or a respected assistant at a major program (Cutcliffe).

Clemson Billboard

And then there’s always Mark Mangino, but since Bojangles hasn’t franchised the Northwest Arkansas region just yet, we doubt that’ll happen:

Bojangles Biscuits

Arkansas Talking To Clemson Coach Tommy Bowden About Job Opening

CHICK-FIL-A BOWL WINNER GETS 1ST TASTE AT HOGS JOB: As folks in Fayetteville hold out hope for Tommy Tuberville trucking on over, Arkansas officials have turned their eye to another Tommy - by the name of Bowden:

Tommy Bowden Tuberville

The COLUMBIA (SC) STATE reports that the Razorbacks have contacted the Clemson coach about their vacant coaching spot. Bowden has three years left on his current contract, but is in talks with the ACC school about a possible extension.Neither Bowden nor Clemson AD Terry Don Phillips had returned comment about Arkansas’ offer. When asked last Sunday about his future with the Tigers, Tommy replied, “I’ll stay as long as they want me.”

Chick-Fil-A sandwich

Bowden’s next game is the Chick-Fil-A Bowl on December 31 - ironically enough against Tuberville and his Auburn squad. Wonder how many tickets have already been snatched up by Fayetteville & Little Rock suits.It’s debatable which orange-hewed school will come out victorious in Atlanta, but with delicious chicken sandwiches all about, everyone’s a winner!

Chick-Fil-A closed Sunday

As long as they’re not playing on Sunday.