The old Texas Stadium, soon to be put out to pasture in favor of Regrettable Corporate Sponsorship-to-be-Named-Later Stadium at Second-Name-Here Field, had room for exactly one malcontent in its rather unimpressive jail cell. However, that simply won’t do when $1.3 billion has been poured into a new taxpayer-funded beer garden with live sports.

(It’s hard to believe Adam Jones is being released by the Cowboys today; they finally finished his locker!)

Therefore, the Dallas Cowboys’ new home will have a desperately-needed upgrade in its new $200,000 jail: two drunk tanks and solitary confinement cells to boot, as well as “state-of-the-art” construction. (We imagine the art of jail construction doesn’t get much play at your modern art museums. Snobs.)
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• Michael Phelps apparently needs to work on his social skills & wardrobe.

No wonder Amanda Beard doesn’t want him.

• An Orlando artist bluffs a local magazine into believing that he used to play for the New York Yankees.

• Any Hollywood film studios want to help blow up Texas Stadium?

• Hideki Irabu may have beaten up a bartender after chugging down 20 beers, but he did pay his bar tab.

• One CFL coach is a cut above the rest - since he uses a knife at practice.

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With the American Airlines Center serving the Mavericks & Stars, and Jerry Jones working on a new billion-dollar home for his Cowboys, Dallas’ old sports venues are no longer needed. Reunion Arena is all locked up & ready to be torn down, while Texas Stadium will be vacated after this season.

And the Dallas Film Commission hopes the destruction of the long-time venues will entice some big-name Hollywood studios to come film the carnage - and more importantly, foot the bill for the blow-ups.

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