Adriana Lima Blessed With Child, Thanks to Marko

• Not only did Memphis Grizzly Marko Jaric get to marry Victoria’s Secret supermodel Adriana Lima, he also got to impregnate her.

Adriana Lima married

(Now that’s what you call one hot mama!)

• Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson & Eagles WR Hank Baskett spend their Memorial Day weekend foolin’ around in the pool with Holly Madison.

Jocelyne & Monique Lamoureux, a pair of hockey-skating sisters, are bringing their game & good looks back to North Dakota.

• The Orlando Magic aren’t sticking to the script of a LeBron-Kobe finals.

• A recently arrested Florida steroids dealer claims that some Washington Capitals & Washington Nationals are among his customers.

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The Nationals Are Not Exactly Hooked On Phonics

You laughed at their jerseys, and searched their media guide to no avail trying to find someone named Jordan Zimmerman. Now the Washington Nationals have struck again. Hmm. Instead of signing a pitcher before the trading deadline, I suggest a couple of characters from “Sesame Street.”

Teddy Rossevelt, 26th Prezidunt of the U.S.

The most remedial of all major professional sports franchises is offering this fine item for sale at Nationals Park, and our 26th President is not amused. Teddy Roosevelt, or “Rossevelt” as he was known to his stupider friends, will boycott all future President Races until this error is fixed. “I charged up San Juan Hill for this? Bah!” Read more…