• VARIETY shoots up news that “Semi-Pro” was the top grossing film of last weekend, but netted only $15 million - “the lowest opening for a major Will Ferrell comedy in almost a decade.”

• In honor of Felix Pie’s twisted testicle, 100% INJURY RATE painfully looks back on some of the more unusual injuries to have befallen athletes.

• The BALTIMORE SUN is shattered that the Orioles’ Kevin Millar decided to break out the pink bat, only to have it splinter after two trips to the plate.

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