BLIMEY! CROATIA KICKS ENGLAND OUT OF 2008 EURO CUP: Despite the best efforts of Israel and airport security, England has done the remarkable and failed to qualify for the Euro 2008 Cup.

The hopes of the English nation that had risen with the Israelis’ dramatic upset of Russia last Saturday, came crashing down on Thursday with a 3-2 home loss to Croatia.The English only had to manage at least a tie with Croatia in order to qualify for next year’s European Championship.

Instead, the team will miss out on their first major soccer tournament since the 1994 World Cup. And England coach Steve McClaren will likely be sent permanently off the pitch.

NO WONDER THE CROATIAN GUY HAS BITTER BEER FACE: Beyond our borders the entire world is watching England attempt to qualify for the European Championship soccer tournament today, which will be held next year in Austria and Switzerland.

The Brits need a tie at home against Croatia to qualify. Thanks to pitiful previous play, England would have no chance to make Euro 2008 if it wasn’t for Israel upsetting Russia earlier this week. Manager Steve McClaren has made a myriad of moves for the match, including benching David Beckham (so they really do want to win, huh).

The English are taking this one pretty damn seriously, as the pregame intimidation starting as soon as the Croatians got off the plane.