• Michael Phelps apparently needs to work on his social skills & wardrobe.

No wonder Amanda Beard doesn’t want him.

• An Orlando artist bluffs a local magazine into believing that he used to play for the New York Yankees.

• Any Hollywood film studios want to help blow up Texas Stadium?

• Hideki Irabu may have beaten up a bartender after chugging down 20 beers, but he did pay his bar tab.

• One CFL coach is a cut above the rest - since he uses a knife at practice.

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Argentinians are a considerate people. Seeing the flak Spain’s basketball teams were taking for their cheeky, oh-so-endearing slit-eyed photo, the Argentinian women’s soccer team stepped in, scoring one for global consciousness everywhere — by doing exact same thing.

Via WITH LEATHER comes the LONDON TELEGRAPH’S story about the Argentinian geniuses in charge of this outreach method. Of course, because one country’s lame bigotry is another country’s hilarious schtick, the Argentinians will likely receive the same treatment as their Spanish cohorts:

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• Even though Michael Phelps made Olympic history, one church doesn’t think the 8-time gold-winning swimmer is all that high and mighty.

• Aghast by Jeff Kent’s comments on Vin Scully, Brewers broadcaster Jim Powell wonders how the Dodgers’ 2nd baseman will be able to play “with that enormous spiked shoe in his mouth.”

• BOSTON SPORTS MEDIA tunes in to learn that fromer DEADSPIN guru Will Leitch has landed a spot on Beantown’s WEEI radio.

• GIZMODO volleys up the true origin of that weird black stuff seen on Kerri Walsh’s shoulder.

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• Mike & The Mad Dog’s radio show is sent to live on a farm upstate.

• Alonzo Mourning helps a Miami Heat fan celebrate her 102nd birthday.

• Some things never change, like John McEnroe’s time-honored tradition of throwing tennis tantrums.

• Michael Wilbon sings for the faithful of the Friendly Confines, but is it a slap in the face to the fourth estate?

• China: Land of many diverse peoples, all played on the Olympic Opening Ceremonial stage by the same ethnic group.

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The Spanish Olympic basketball team committed a pretty big gaffe recently when they decided to have their picture taken while making their eyes look “slanty” (read: stereotypically Chinese).

People freaked out, society screamed “INJUSTICE, SIRS!”, the Spanish acted contritely apologetic, and then the world said “Awwwwww, silly racist Spaniards. Of course we forgive you.” But Adrian Wojnarowski of YAHOO! SPORTS has an interesting slant on the story, whereby Jason Kidd tells the world he will not stand for the racial injustices that are permeating our fair sports.

Actually, Jason just doesn’t think that what went down was fair.

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• An Hungarian weightlifter gets bent out of shape over a very painful lift.

• Players from Spain’s Olympic basketball team fail to see the harm done with their little slant-eyed photo op.

• Chad Johnson might be taking this whole “Ocho Cinco” thing a bit too far.

• Those Nebraska wrestlers who had pics pop up on a gay porn site have been cut from the Cornhuskers squad.

• One day, you’re guarding the Olympic torch relay. The next day, you’re a heartthrob to millions of Chinese girls.

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By now, everyone’s seen Spain’s famous slit-eyed photo. It’s a real dandy. Comedy genius at its finest.

Of course, once the photo leaked yesterday, it was pretty obvious there would be an uproar — perhaps loudest from the host nation. Now that the uproar’s in full swing, Spain has to make its apology, which surely means a heartfelt response to the concerns of a billion people, right?

Um, not so much.

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• Some Packers fans feeling burned by Brett decided to hold a Favre-B-Q.

• The Spanish Olympic basketball team poses for a photo mocking Chinese people. Wonder if they apologized by saying, “Me so solly!”

• Bruce Springsteen may be doing the E Street Shuffle all the way to Tampa to perform in this year’s Super Bowl.

• Michael Vick could have post-prison employment waiting for him with Mark Cuban’s startup football league.

• Swimmer Jason Lezak helps Michael Phelps (oh, and the U.S., too) capture another gold medal, all while silencing those French taunters.

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