SHARAPOVA SEES HER FUTURE IN BONDS….JAMES BONDS: It would appear that Wimbledon is not enough, as Maria Sharapova’s next racket is to be a Bond girl.

A friend of the tennis star told the TIMES OF INDIA that Maria is a big fan of the 007 films, and she herself feels her “Russian blood” would make her perfect for James’ latest sexy sidekick.

Sharapova seems to have prepared for any possible role: “I’m really good at manipulating people. And I’m great at spying. I should have been Sherlock Holmes.”

As she smashes away in England, Sharapova has been rumored to be considered for two upcoming Bonds films: “From Russia With 40-Love” and “You Only Fault Twice.”

But if M or Q disapprove, Sharapova has a plan B to play for the other side. She’s stated that after current Bond Daniel Craig, her choice for dream tennis partner would be Russian prez (and ex-KGB officer) Vladimir Putin.

YELTSIN WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR RUSSIAN TENNIS HOTTIES: Former Russian President Boris Yeltsin passed away this week. He’s of course the man given credit for somehow keeping the country while the Soviet Union collapsed.

The MOSCOW TIMES provides a different perspective on the man who was often known as the “Russian Bear” and admired for his prodigious *thirst*: “Yevgeny Kafelnikov, Marat Safin and Maria Sharapova brought Russia tennis glory, but it was keen player and avid fan Boris Yeltsin who helped make the sport popular nationwide. .. it was mainly because of the former Russian president that the game became a pastime that appealed to the masses.”

So in other words, without Yeltsin, we probably would’ve never been introduced to the spirit-raising charms of Anna Kournikova and Maria Sharapova.

IS THIS FACE REALLY WORTH TWO BILLION DOLLARS? The divorce of Russian multi-billionaire and Chelsea FC Owner Roman Abramovich is final, and his second wife (of 15 years) Irina, has reportedly accepted a settlement of over $2B - thanks to this woman:

Abramovich’s wife forced the split after he was caught by London tabloid NEWS OF THE WORLD philandering with the above female, 23-year-old Russian socialite Daria Zhukova.

Zhukova, who also graduated with honors at UC Santa Barbara, is the daughter of another Russian billionaire, who like Abramovich, amassed a colossal fortune by questionable means following the fall of the Soviet Union.

Despite her innocent visage, before she started shacking up with soccer club owner (who is twice her age, not that there is anything wrong with that), Daria had already been put through the jet-set ringer by Russian tennis star Marat Safin.

I’d also like to personally thank Safin for giving me reason to pop out the old, trusty “Marat Safin Girlfriend” photo. Which has probably given two billion internet users the same feeling that Abramovich’s ex-wife is experiencing at the moment.