In this episode of “As The Dodgers Turn,” we learn some interesting things about catcher Russell Martin. Like: he might have had a drinking problem! And: it’s OK now, because his hot girlfriend has him whipped and he’s over all the partying!

You know things might have been bad when T.J. Simers feels the need to mention that during this interview, Martin wasn’t hung over. But that all changed when he met his muse, model Marikym Hervieux. Let’s delve inside Martin’s demons, and see more of the woman who changed him, after the jump.

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The reviews are in for Topps’ new Web series Back on Topps, starring Randy and Jason Sklar. OK, “review,” but it’s a Web series - what did you expect, Roger Ebert? Unfortunately, AD AGE isn’t being too kind, calling the Sklar Brothers “dopey” and saying the whole thing seems like a “sad imitator” of shows like Arrested Development. Is this the Waterworld of promotional Web series?

The premise? The Sklars play Leyland and Leif Topps, who find out that their uncle has sold the company business to a corporate conglomerate owned by Michael Eisner. They struggle to keep the mission of Topps cards afloat as the mean penny-pinching executive plots their downfall. Also, there’s a stalker. And sports cameos by Andre Ethier, Russell Martin and Kevin Love. So basically, whatever B-list athletes happened to be hanging around in LA that day and were down for getting a free lunch.

Is it any good? Check out an episode for yourself after the jump:

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Clint Hurdle is all that is wrong with this country. The Rockies manager told the DENVER POST that he abhors the Dodgers, which is as un-American as hating the Dallas Cowboys, or Peter King speaking ill of Brett Favre.

I thought that despising the Los Angeles baseball team that actually plays in LA was a right reserved for Jeff Kent (and, eventually, Manny Ramirez, because that’s his shtick), but apparently anybody can do it.

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BURNETT NIPPLES CAUSE RIPPLE IN DODGERS CLUBHOUSE: The TORONTO STAR reported during Spring Training this season that Blue Jays pitcher A.J. Burnett had nipple rings.

But as of this week, the TORONTO SUN’s Kathryn Humphreys sadly reports that Burnett is no longer wearing them.

The news came as a relief to Dodger catcher Russell Martin, who for some reason felt the need to present this scenario to Humphreys: “What if I’m sliding into second base and they rip? Ouch. And what if you go in the sun and they get hot and it burns? I don’t want that to happen to me.”

Humphreys asked another Dodger, Andre Ethier, if he wore the torso decorations. The outfielder replied, “You’ll be shocked to find this out, but I have nipple rings.”

Turns out Ethier was fibbing, but he did say that he once had a minor league teammate who chose that particular piercing, and “In fact, I made a point not to look as much. You don’t want to be the gawker. You don’t want to be that guy, especially in the shower.”

Maybe it’s just us, but gang showers and gawkers don’t usually bring nipple rings first to mind.

• MR. IRRELEVANT celebrates a milestone as Comcast’s ‘Blog Show’ hits the double-digit mark:

• Forget Zito: Alyssa Milano is smitten with Russell Martin:

• OUR BOOK OF SCRAP offers a bracket with plenty of busts - The Hottest Wives/Girlfriends in Sports:

• Your vote counts! THE WIZARD OF ODDS has reached the finals of their Great Billboard Competition:

• THE HATER NATION reports Roger Clemens’ first MLB start will be facing the Sox - but against a whiter shade of pale.

• SPORTS COLUMN offers up some soccer players getting a leg-up on field-invading fans:

• Speaking of the pitch, SOCCERNISTA has a nice chat with manic-turned-MBA-man Alexi Lalas.

• Look out Bon Jovi & Elway: SPORTS COUCH POTATO sees history in the making, as long-time sideline sports reporter Lesley Visser is looking to snag an Arena Football team:

• BLOWN COVERAGE invites you to grab a brew or three and play the Atlanta Braves Drinking Game:

• BABES LOVE BASEBALL wonders why the threatening Elijah Dukes is still allowed to play.