Rio Might Not Be Wisest Choice For Olympic Golf

Hip hip hooray for Rio de Janeiro, the 2016 Summer Olympics hosts. Sure, all of the endemic problems with Chicago (crime, corruption, not enough white people) are only worse down there, but hey, thongs and a giant Jesus cure all ills, right?

Maracana Stadium illustration
(That’s pretty cool, guys, but I don’t see anywhere to play 18 in that thing.)

Tiny thing, though; we are kind of wondering how, exactly, Rio actually got the bid. If it’s because Pele showed up at the IOC’s meeting in Copenhagen, or because Barack Obama went there at all, or because Obama didn’t spend enough time there for the IOC’s needs, whatever. We don’t think, though, that the Games went to Rio on account of its actual ability to host them; golfers, in particular, shouldn’t get too comfy in the Olympic Village, because they’re going to have a long trip in front of them.

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The 2016 Olympics: Welcome To The City Of Jesus

Although things aren’t too cheerful at the White House right now, there’s much banging of percussion instruments and dancing the Samba in other parts of the world over Rio de Janeiro’s choice as host of the 2016 Olympic Games. Exotic beaches. Beautiful women. These guys. It’s gonna be the world’s biggest party, right?

Police training in Rio

Well, maybe, but I’ve seen enough episodes of “City Of Men” to know that there may be pitfalls to this plan. In a lot of ways, Rio is the worst possible spot for the Olympics. And while their successful bid will go a long way toward revitalizing the city and the entire nation, will six-plus years be enough time to pull it all off? The answer is shrouded in mystery, and a fair amount of pollution. Read more…

Pele Says He’ll Rep Brazil ‘Til Death; Where’s MJ?

The IOC’s highly anticipated 2016 Summer Olympics vote is tomorrow, and what initially appeared to be a slam dunk for the USA has turned into a legitimate two-horse race.

(Pele, representing his country by holding up a Brazilian flag. Please disregard the flag in his other hand.)

Try as President Obama might, Chicago is facing stiff competition from Rio de Janeiro for hosting rights, and it might have something to do with the fact that the Brazilian athletic community is pulling out all the stops. And by that, of course, we mean bringing Pele to Copenhagen on Friday to represent Brazil’s bid. When one thinks of Chicago’s most famous athletes, of course, the list starts and ends with Brad Sellers Michael Jordan. He’s not going to Copenhagen, though, and that means it’s time for Pele to somehow overstate his importance. Mission accomplished.

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