Carl Landry Suffers Gunshot For No Good Reason

Pride is a hell of a thing. For its timeless role as the third leg of the sporting tripod - next to athleticism and rules, if you were curious - it’s still above all else a deadly sin. It’s what drives overreactions and escalations on scales large and small. It was also on the back of every jersey of a rival football team when I was growing up, which led to some spectacularly easy incest jokes. But I digress. Pride can be good, but pride can just as easily be lethally dangerous.

Carl Landry
(Doing just fine, all things considered.)

Take, for example, Houston forward Carl Landry. While driving home this morning after a Monday night game against New Orleans, Landry was involved in a small collision with another car just southeast of downtown Houston. When Landry got out of the car to inspect what damage, if any occurred, he was shot at twice by the occupants of the other car, one bullet striking his leg. The damage was relatively light - a flesh wound that’ll keep him out for about two weeks - but it’s still just about the dumbest thing we’ve heard this week. Read more…

Richard Collier Talks About Shooting/Amputation

• Jacksonville Jaguars lineman Richard Collier speaks out for the first time since being shot 14 times & having his leg amputated.

Richard Collier

• Since the Rose Bowl’s been like a second home to USC lately, the Trojans will wear their red home unis when visiting UCLA this Saturday.

Dusty Baker wants one more chance to ruin Kerry Wood’s arm.

• At least one football league is United in its support of Michael Vick.

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Richard Collier’s Improving A Little More Everyday

You may remember the story of Jacksonville Jaguars offensive lineman Richard Collier being shot earlier this season.  If you don’t, here’s a quick recap.  Richard was out with former teammate Kenny Pettway back on September 2nd when they met a couple of women out at the club.   So Richard and Kenny went to the ladies apartment building, and while they were waiting outside for them, somebody rolled up on the two of them and started firing.

While Pettway escaped unharmed, the same couldn’t be said for Collier.  He was shot 14 times — 14 times! — and with two of the bullets hitting him in his lower spine, Collier was left paralyzed from the waist down.   Later a blood clot in his left leg forced doctors to amputate the leg from the knee down.  Obviously it was a terrible night for Collier, but the odd part of it is, he never even realized he’d been shot.

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Speed Read: No Penalties, No Subs, No Time Limit

Officially, the Steelers-Ravens game had six injury timeouts. Something tells me more than six players got their bodies bruised last night. Fortunately, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell didn’t implement the Rollerball championship game rules in this game, because it probably would have ended up with both punters just kicking the ball to each other.

Rollerball-like conditions in Ravens-Steelers MNF

Andre Frazier was stretchered off on the first play. Both teams were down to their third-string running backs by overtime. Willis McGahee was helped off twice. Strangely, QBs Ben Roethlisberger and Joe Flacco, the two guys who got rassled down to the ground all night, didn’t leave the game prematurely with boo-boos.

But are there really any winners, as a society increased its desire for bloodlust on this night? (Sorry, that was mighty post-apocalyptic for a sports blog.) In the post-game conference, Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin said the injuries did not dampen their hard-fought 23-20 win over B’more. “That’s football.” And thank God almighty for penalties, substitutions and time limits.

Speaking of men with no apparent time limits, let’s bring in our comic relief. Headlining tonight’s gig will be Funny Bone Ticker of the Year, Al Davis and the Oakland Raiders! [applause]

Al Davis

(Wow. He’s never looked better.)

Davis has never been a buy-the-book guy. When the book says “fire your coach, then look for a replacement?” Davis burns the book. (Or feeds it to a lamprey.) No, Davis is hellbent on finding a replacement to Lane Kiffin first, then subsequently firing Kiffin, ESPN is reporting. Perhaps this is all a cunning ruse by Davis, through the wise advise of former literary agent John Hodgman, to convince the world that time is moving backwards. By Week 11, he’ll inexplicably announce Lane Kiffin as the new head coach of the Raiders. By 2010, he’ll hire Art Shell, just to throw the world a curveball. And in 2015, he’ll lose his virginity.

So if you’re curious if Kiffin’s been canned yet, there’s only one definitive place to bookmark and refresh. The official website of the countdown, HASLANEKIFFINBEENFIRED.COM:

Has Kiffin Been Fired?

(Could Abe Froman be interested in the job?)

Kiffin probably doesn’t deserve to be head coach anymore, but man, when did it make sense to can coaches before October? (I think we’ve all had ex-girlfriends who we’ve strung along for far less time than Davis has done with Kiffin.) The SANTA ROSA PRESS DEMOCRAT notes that if Kiffin’s job is saved, Kalimba Edwards might have had something to do with it.

Tiger on his knees, not in my tank

The world’s best golfer has a time limit of 24 months before he can play again? So stay strong and resolute in your fantasy golf keeper leagues, because Tiger Woods‘ ACL injury recovery could last as long as two years, sez THE TELEGRAPH. World famous surgeon Lanny L. Johnson said — no kidding! — that the ligament means something different to football players than it does to golfers:

“If you tear your cruciate ligament in American football, you can play within a year – and with full confidence within two years. Based on this, and the recovery period of other athletes, I am guessing that Tiger will need two years.”

Wow. What a world in which we take advice from guys named Lanny.

What about a world in which you take advice from guys named Joey Porter?

Joey Porter, financial advisor

  • The Dolphins linebacker knows how to get us out of this economic recession. ESPN’s NFL NATION gets the financial advice we’ve been waiting to hear: just dig a hole in your backyard and put your money in there. Skeptical? Hey, he was right about Matt Cassel.
  • Then Porter can tell you to go back in time and bet on the Tampa Bay Rays to win the American League who, as VEGAS WATCH points out, were at 75-1 odds to start the year. (Quick story about this. We saw the Vegas Hilton Sportsbook odds a couple weeks ago, and at the top stood the Yankees’ AL hopes at 2500-1. Second from the bottom was Tampa, at 20-1. Oh what a beautiful sight it was.)
  • A somber update to Jaguars offensive lineman Richard Collier, who was shot 14 times last month: His leg was amputated and will be paralyzed from the waist down for the rest of his life.
  • So you just lost your quarterback for the season? No worries. If you’re the Washington Huskies, and your QB is Jake Locker, just move him to safety, COLLEGE FOOTBALL TALK murmurs.
  • Gilbert Arenas‘ life, because it needed to be said, is still better than yours. As he shares on AGENT ZERO, the Wiz’ star is now engaged, and he didn’t even have to pop the question.
  • Ousted Rams coach Scott Linehan can at least take solace that more people approved of this work than they do of still-employed Vikings coach Brad Childress, RANDBALL discovers.
  • Meaningless game for the Tigers on Monday? Tell that to Jim Leyland, who told MLB.COM: “I wanted to win this game today bad … because we wanted to get another win. It’s not like you’re trying to knock the White Sox out as much as you’re trying to get a win and you’re trying to be professional and go about your business. I tried everything I knew how to do.”
  • Encouraging words from the Toronto Maple Leafs’ Ron Wilson to the GLOBE AND MAIL regarding the upcoming NHL season: “We’re not going to win the Stanley Cup this year. There’s a news flash for you.” Honesty. You gotta respect that, at least.
  • Pssh. What the heck does Will Leitch know about New York sports? That didn’t stop him from sharing his ten best Big Apple athletes for NEW YORK MAGAZINE.
  • Oh yeah, and the White Sox play the Twins for the AL Central crown today. It’s Nick Blackburn against John Danks. No, I’m not envious by jamming this nugget at the end of the article. Nuh-uh.

What’s most likely to happen in today’s Sox-Twins playoff game?

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Blog-O-Rama: Friedgen Almost Pulls A Mike Gundy

• STET SPORTS BLOG catches Maryland coach Ralph Friedgen almost pulling a Mike Gundy after a close win over Delaware.

Ralph Friedgen in golf cart

• WALKOFF WALK hurls up word that Todd Rundgren’s son is playing for the Dodgers’ Triple-A team in Vegas. (For those wondering who the heck Todd Rundgren is, he’s the guy that did that “Bang On The Drum All Day” song.)

• DEUCE OF DAVENPORT doesn’t know what to say, as researchers discover that watching sports can make you a better speaker.

• SIGNAL TO NOISE isn’t so pleased with everyone jumping to conclusions about Richard Collier’s character, just because the Jags lineman was shot in a drive-by attack.

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Erin Andrews Answers Rumblings of Rutgers Fans

• Rutgers fans are rankled that Erin Andrews wasn’t working their game on Monday. Erin responds by having replacement reporter Rob Stone read her official statement on the matter during the game.

Erin Andrews fullbody

George O’Leary & UCF certainly know how to make a teleconference titillating - just send the media a phone sex number by mistake.

• Figures that Oklahoma football players would get in a bar brawl Sooner or later.

• Jaguars OT Richard Collier is in critical condition after getting shot early Tuesday morning.

• Cubs catcher Koyie Hill makes it back to the Majors after almost having his fingers cut off in a wood saw accident.

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Jags OT Richard Collier Shot, In Critical Condition

Jacksonville Jaguars offensive tackle Richard Collier is clinging to life at this moment, the victim of a late-night shooting outside a woman’s home. Collier had been out at several night clubs with former Jaguar player Kenneth Petway. They met several women and were waiting outside one of their homes on the way to another night club, when Collier was shot at around 2:30 a.m. early Tuesday.

As Collier and Petway were sitting in an Cadillac Escalade waiting on the women (they were in a separate car), Jefferson says someone came up and started shooting.

Several bullets hit Collier. Petway, who was a passenger in the truck, was not hurt. Police do not have a motive or description of the suspect. Jefferson says he’s not sure if the women saw anything. He told us they are shocked.

I’d be shocked, too. Read more…