• ON 205TH MAGAZINE tracks down photos of the top female tennis player in the world, Ana Ivanovic, enjoying some time away from the court on vacation. Fortunately for us, the paparazzi are never on vacation.



• WALK OFF WALK’s bid for the Chicago Cubs was not accepted, but Mark Cuban’s bid was. If Mark was able to land the Cubs, our calendars would have zero Cuban-free months.
• DEADSPIN’s Beijing Bureau provides some insight on last week’s report from the SOUTH CHINA MORNING POST that drinking establishments were instructed by the government not to serve blacks & Mongolians.
• LOS ANGELES TIMES LAKER BLOG continues their coverage of the Laker Girl tryouts, this time with video evidence that TIMES’ blogger Adam Rose has a better job than you do.

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• Bethlehem Shoals of THE SPORTING BLOG wonders if Yao Ming’s early exit actually means he doesn’t want to play in the Olympics.

• Victory is mine! BALL DON’T LIKE learns the Kevin Garnett & crew got a special locker room visit from the man behind “Family Guy“.

• Speaking of the guys in green, The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS hears that Charles Dolan really believes his Knicks will be the next Celtics.

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Mike Florio at PRO FOOTBALL TALK reports that Zach Thomas has agreed to a deal with the Dallas Cowboys that “carries a $1 million signing bonus and a $1 million base salary in 2008. Thomas also can earn up to $1 million in incentives. Though it’s technically a multi-year deal, the structure will make it essentially a one-year relationship.”

The multi-concussed, former Texas Tech Red Raider had previously met with the Patriots (who offered him a contract on the spot) and the New Orleans Saints.

Read more…

GROSSMAN WRECKS KNEE, LEAVES THURSDAY NIGHT GAME: AOL FANHOUSE reports that Bears QB Rex Grossman left in the first quarter of Thursday night’s contest against the Redskins with a knee injury.

Since the game was broadcast on the inaccessible NFL Network, we await confirmation via Pony Express next week.

• WITH LEATHER wants to know if you know how to Ram it:

• MR. IRRELEVANT is disturbed by the way the media thinks Sean Taylor had it coming.• THE GHOSTS OF WAYNE FONTES hits the bookshelves to find literary help for these sports figures.

• Some drunk Ole Miss gals give their thoughts on the dearly departed Coach Orgeron:

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS finds Lou Holtz in an uproar over the Internet.• Before their big Sunday matchup, THE SPORTS HERNIA compares dueling QBs Eli & Rex.

• 100% INJURY RATE tries to cure itself of Olympic fever, as they run down past mascots of the Games:

• FOOTBALL JESUS LAS VEGAS takes a fond look back at all the College GameDay signs at last week’s Kansas-Missouri game.• CHICAGO BULL finds the Illinois football and basketball coaches are exact opposites.

PATS CLINCH AFC EAST; CALI NFL TEAMS 3-0 IN WEEK 12: There was a possible reason why New England had such a close call against the Eagles - the Patriots were too caught up with winning the AFC East:

Even before Tom Brady & crew hit the field Sunday night, the Pats clinched their division thanks to Buffalo’s loss against Jacksonville. And there’s still 5 weeks left in the season.Meanwhile, the Bills defeat meant the state of New York went winless in NFL action this holiday weekend. (The Jets lost to the Cowboys on Turkey Day, and the Giants were blown-out by the Vikings on Sunday).

On the flip side, the state of California notched a 3-0 record for Week 12 (San Fran over Arizona in OT, Oakland over KC, San Diego over Baltimore).With the Jaguars’ win and Tampa Bay beating the Redskins, the Sunshine State could also reach the same undefeated mark, if Miami somehow beats Pittsburgh on Monday night.

But the biggest shocker of all must be Rex Grossman somehow leading the Bears to victory.

• BIG TEN TAILGATE starts early, and we do mean early, as a Minnesota 9-year-old is cited for underage drinking:

• DEUCE OF DAVENPORT presents, “Everything You Wanted To Know About Groin Injuries (But Were Afraid To Ask).”

• RIVALFISH stretches on the bench, as they peek into a day in the life of Bears non-starter Rex Grossman.

• THE BEAUTIFUL GAME shows this soccer player feeling a little testy after scoring a goal:

• MY BRAIN SAYS RAGE pings off about banning metal bats in Pennsylvania.

• EPIC CARNIVAL lays down the law, as they offer these new rules for NFL fans.

• As LeBron gets ready to host “Saturday Night Live” (is that show still on?), Jeff Gordon of FOX SPORTS races in to tell these celebrity athletes, “Don’t quit your day job“:

• And when King James isn’t starring in lame skits, he’s teaming up with Russian racketeer Maria Sharapova to help fight poverty.

• STORMING THE FLOOR gives away news that NBA star Carmelo Anthony is in a charitable mood these days.

• FAN IQ has their boogie fever bought out, as Chad Johnson’s next end zone dance will be brought to you by GoDaddy:

• Speaking of Ocho Cinco, we finally have a winner in his Yahoo-sponsored Touchdown Celebration Showdown.

• ALL-AMERICAN PATRIOTS quenches our thirst, as Kevin Durant becomes the first-ever NBA rookie to sign a deal with Gatorade.

• MR. IRRELEVANT feels the anger rising within, as Redskins RB Clinton Portis just wants the damn ball:

• FIRE JOE MORGAN doesn’t find it Natural that the Rangers would play that song after a Sammy Sosa homer.

• RUMORS AND RANTS just won’t let some things go, as Vince Young is still miffed about not winning the Heisman.

• With the NBA season not too far away, THE BLOWTORCH pays tribute to the finest basketball stashes ’staches:

• CAN’T STOP THE BLEEDING gets the poop on the pigeon problem at Paul Brown Stadium.

• These just won’t stop: AZ SPORTS HUB finds the latest “Leave Britney Alone!!!” video spoof - this time, in support of benched Bears QB Rex Grossman.

BUEHRLE BAGS BEAR SINCE SOX COULDN’T CATCH CUBS: Since the Chicago White Sox couldn’t curb the Cubs this year, Mark Buehrle decided to aim bigger and bag a bear.

The CHICAGO TRIBUNE reports that the pitcher was able to kill a 200-pound bear while hunting Saturday night. During a weekend series at the Minnesota Twins, some South Siders decided to head up north to catch a different kind of game.

With fellow Pale Hosers Jim Thome, A.J. Pierzynski and Jermaine Dye in tow, Buehrle bagged the beast by bow & arrow - getting the grizzly from 20 yards away. The bear managed to run another 30 yards before falling - just like Rex Grossman on a blitz, but in the opposite direction.

Buehrle may want to compare notes with the Cowboys, who also have experience bringing down Bears.

What will the slinger-slash-sportsman do with his 1/10-ton trophy now? He plans to “have the head stuffed and have a necklace made out of a bear claw.”

Mmmmm….bear claw.

But not all are happy with Buehrle’s big score. Over on the comment board of the Tribune article, many posters are perturbed by the “disgusting” hunt, asking why such millionaire athletes would spend their free time killing innocent animals.

Well, the Sox need to find something to do, since they have nothing scheduled for October.

EAGLES QB McNABB TRUMPS CRITICISM WITH RACE CARD: Donovan McNabb believes black quarterbacks have a tougher time in the NFL than their white counterparts.

SPORTS BUSINESS DAILY has the word from McNabb’s recent appearance on HBO’s “Real Sports”, where he says he and others like him are at a disadvantage:

“There are not that many African-American quarterbacks, so we have to do a little bit extra…because the percentage of us playing this position - which people didn’t want us to play this position - is low.”

But we thought the media loved African-American QBs and wanted them to succeed, no matter how talented they were - at least according to windbag Rush Limbaugh.

McNabb also added that white QBs, like Peyton Manning and Carson Palmer, “don’t get criticized as much as we do.”

Yep, Eli can do no wrong in New York, and Rex Grossman has taken the Windy City by storm. And don’t forget how madly in love Chargers fans were with Ryan Leaf.

Meanwhile, Tennesseeans don’t seem to be too happy with Vince Young leading the Titans.

Keep in mind that Pro Bowler Peyton just led the Colts to a Super Bowl victory, and Carson has helped turn one of the league’s worst teams into a contender.

Also realize that McNabb plays in Philadelphia, where they once booed Santa Claus, and cheered when Michael Irvin was carted off the Vet field on a stretcher. Philly fans aren’t the most patient and positive.

Donovan just needs to sit back, relax, and have a bowl of Campbell’s Chunky to sooth his fragile nerves.