SbB: Promoting Frozen Sports Anchors Since 2001

Today we celebrate the day LAUREN WENT DOWN. And …

• Why did Bob Knight leave Lubbock? The Texas Tech coach quit for his kid.

Bob Knight finger pistols

• A high school footballer is heading to Cal on a full scholarship - just don’t tell Jeff Tedford.

• So distraught over the loss, a former Pats staffer (Matt Walsh, maybe?) is selling his Super Bowl ring.

• According to the MSM, the only thing Plaxico Burress didn’t do was threaten to bleed on the Patriots.

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Giants-Pats Game Most Watched Super Bowl Ever

Sorry, Puppy Bowl. The ASSOCIATED PRESS reports that New York’s Giant upset over New England was the most watched Super Bowl ever.

Eli Manning Giants Super Bowl Trophy

According to the Nielsen numbers, over 97 million viewers tuned in to see Eli Manning out-duel Tom Brady on Sunday, with 81% of the sets in Boston and 67% of the TVs in New York tuned into the game.

Fox’s pre-game festivities, including a red-carpet walk hosted by Ryan Seacrest, helped bring in the “American Idol” crowd - and also bring up some amusing quips from the boys in the booth.

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Aussies Rather Watch Cricket Than Maria vs. Ana

With such an alluring match-up between Maria Sharapova & Ana Ivanovic, it would’ve been hard not to tune in to the Australian Open women’s final.

Maria Sharapova Ana Ivanovic

Unless you had the tube on Down Under, and there was cricket on other stations.

The BRISBANE COURIER-MAIL reports that Aussie TV ratings for this year’s “Glam Slam” were actually down from last year’s final. Over 33% less viewers tuned in Australia’s Channel Seven to see Maria beat Ana than those that watched Sharapova lose to Serena Williams in 2007.

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KU-MU TV Ratings Obliterate Chiefs Numbers In KC

MARK MANGINO AS TV SPOKESMODEL JUST HIT AN UPTICK: Jeff Flanagan of the KANSAS CITY STAR reports the TV ratings for the KU-MU game in Kansas City obliterated the next-day ratings for Raiders-Chiefs in the KC.

Kansas Fan Dragging Tiger

Saturday the college game earned a 38.6 rating, while the NFL broadcast netted a 31.8 on Sunday. The Chiefs top number this year is a 34.8 in an earlier game against Oakland.Flanagan adds, “Last year’s BCS title game between Ohio State and Florida? That drew a ho-hum 18.2 rating in Kansas City.

Mangino Is Thinking Arbys

With viewership like that, a Swanson’s Mark Mangino Hungry Man frozen dinner ad spot for the KU bowl game has to be in the offing.

Patriots-Colts Highest Regular Season NFL Rating Since 1986

PATS-COLTS GET HIGHEST REG. SEASON RATING SINCE ‘86: SPORTS BUSINESS DAILY reports that “CBS earned a 22.5/39 overnight Nielsen rating for Patriots-Colts yesterday afternoon, marking the highest overnight for a regular-season Sunday afternoon NFL game since ‘86.

Indianapolis Colts fans

The broadcast will likely turn out to be “the highest-rated program on television since the Academy Awards on ABC in February, which earned a 26.4/42 overnight.

The Fabulous Moolah Wrestler

We expect both of those records to go down tonight, with the WWE set to broadcast a poignant retrospective of the life and times of the late, great Fabulous Moolah on Monday Night Raw.

Charles Barkley hates Nielsen rating system but wants NBA team in Las Vegas

CHARLES BARKS FOR NBA VEGAS TEAM, HOWLS AT NIELSEN: Sir Charles decrees his support for a Vegas NBA team, but disagrees with the way TV viewership is rated.

Barkley and TNT colleague Kenny Smith recently held court with the media, and SPORTS ILLUSTRATED was there to absorb the knowledge.

Barkley SI misspell

Of course, it would help if SI learned to spell Chuck’s last name correctly.Among the nuggets of wisdom tossed around, Charles is on Oscar Goodman’s side in trying to bring a franchise to the mayor’s good city: “We need a team in Vegas. Gambling is not bad for you. It’s like alcohol. Alcohol ain’t bad for you unless you are an alcoholic.”

Charles Barkley poker

Although Chuck’s all for playing in Sin City, he’s not so cheerio about placing NBA squads abroad:”I’ve got no problem going to play exhibition games over there: taking (Manu) Ginobili back to Argentina, taking Tony Parker back to France, taking Dirk (Nowitzki) back to Germany, Yao Ming over to China; I think that’s great. But to have a real game and having guys fly - I flew to China this summer, and it’s a 15-hour flight - you can’t play basketball in that situation. It’s just not good for you.”

Barkley also chimes in on the idiocy of Nielsen’s iron grip of the idiot box:

The rating system is full of s—….You can’t give three people in this room a box and assume 5,000 or 10,000 are watching the same thing.

Sanford & Son

“I can tell you if they gave me and my boy Kenny a box, ‘Sanford and Son’ would have been the No. 1 show in the Nielsen ratings!

Where’s the love for “Good Times”, or “The Jeffersons”?

But with a writers strike looming, Redd Foxx’s reruns may get the top spot yet.

Blogs: NBA Good Points, Snoop Dogg Soulja Boy

• Tired of the NBA’s negative press, ESPN’s J.A. Adande writes about what’s right with the league:

TNT NBA crew

• YOU BEEN BLINDED knows it ain’t nothing but a G thang, as Snoop Dogg gets caught up in the Souljizlle Boy-izzle.• The DENVER BUSINESS JOURNAL changes the channel, as this year’s Sox-Rox matchup was the second-lowest watched in World Series history.

• 100% INJURY RATE checks their air miles, as a California high school goes a long way just to grab some ineligible football players:

Samoan

• PART MULE checks out news that 38-year-old SC QB-turned-druggie skater Todd Marinovich is checking back into rehab.• DEUCE OF DAVENPORT buzzes with news of a new way to build better bones.

• The CHICAGO TRIBUNE pulls up anchor, as this could be the year that Navy sinks Notre Dame:

Navy Notre Dame old football

• THE GRAND NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS takes a good, long look, and previews every MLB free agent available.• GHOSTS OF WAYNE FONTES celebrates All Hallow’s Eve by slicing together some of the biggest massacres in sports.

• BIG TEN TAILGATE packs their bags, as a travel agency is already booking BCS Championship charters for Ohio State fans:

BCS Ohio State trip

• If I’M WRITING SPORTS had been in Staples Center last Tuesday, they certainly wouldn’t have booed Kobe.• MR. IRRELEVANT is confident that the Washington Wizards will have a magical season this year.