There’s not much worse than hearing nonsense about your favorite fringe sport not getting enough “respect”. You don’t want respect for your sport! You want to lock the doors and shutter the windows when you start getting “respect” because that’s when the marketers and advertisers start sniffing around your beloved activity and determining the best way to suck the life force out as quickly as possible.
(Best of three synergistic cross-promotional opportunities, anyone?)
Sorry, ping pong; the last paragraph totally isn’t true. There’s nothing but good that can come from finding out that Budweiser (via their new owner, InBev) has been sniffing around your sport because “Bud Light is a fun brand” and they’d love to be associated with your tournament and ESPN wouldn’t mind broadcasting the finals because
this might be an inroad to China’s consumers they love the game.
Run! Grab your paddles and run for your lives!
I’ve never been much of a ping pong player. Not because I’m no good at it, but because I have absolutely no interest in playing it unless there are Solo cups filled with beer involved. When that’s the case, I’m usually just too drunk to play.
The game is just too boring, and when it’s played well, it’s very hard to follow. That little white ball moves quick and you can’t really see it, so if ping-pong is ever really going to succeed in the United States, somebody is going to have to add some flare to the game. Somebody is going to have to grab our attention, and I think I just found the man ping pong needs.
I’d say we’re all a little footballed out. After a week in which half of the games were decided by more than two touchdowns, and the ones that weren’t included the Browns-Colts and Bills-Niners crapfests, I think it’s time for a sport in which the winning side is guaranteed to put up 21 points: table-tennis.
Before you go deleting your bookmarks, I found the one thing that can possibly make table tennis cool. After mastering the ancient Chinese art of asskickery, Bruce Lee mastered the ancient Chinese art of ping pong. And because playing with a paddle would be unfair to any mortal opponents, Lee plays the game with nunchucks. Yep, there’s video, and yep, you’ll want to click through. (Enter the dragon, after the jump.)
Each morning, bloggers and columnists peruse news headlines looking for interesting material for commentary. Some, like myself, have a soft spot for pun-rich lodes of comedy gold. So imagine my glee when I was sent this story about a Chinese ping pong celebrity named Wang Hao who engaged in drunken fisticuffs with a security guard while trying to publicly urinate outside a Karaoke bar.
ESPN.COM reports that Wang spurted forth the following, with commentary after the jump:
One final fond farewell to Will Leitch, and a hearty welcome to A.J. Daulerio.
• Boston Celtics star Paul Pierce shows up on Jimmy Kimmel’s show in style - by coming on stage while riding in a wheelchair.
• Justin Gimelstob, tell us how you really feel about Anna Kournikova.
• Darrell Arthur did a lot of traveling Thursday night without ever leaving Madison Square Garden.
• The inspiration for Alla Kudryavtseva’s big upset over Maria Sharapova: “I don’t like her outfit.”
• Are the Cubs looking to get the “L” (flag) out of Wrigley Field?
Tags: Anna Kournikova
, Chicago Cubs
, Darrell Arthur
, Jimmy Kimmel
, Justin Gimelstob
, Larry Holmes
, Maria Sharapova
, Paul Pierce
, Ping Pong
, Rick Greenspan
, Ron Zook