Pennsylvania residents Trammel Bledsoe and Phillip Sainsbury are not exactly model citizens.  In fact, they’re bank robbers (though they aren’t related to Deidra Lane) who are currently in prison after getting busted by the cops.  They also happen to be sports fans, and have found a fun new way to use sports knowledge to help commit crimes.

While Bledsoe is in prison he knows his telephone calls are being recorded.  So when he called his friend Joshua Burton to give him instructions on where to find the gun he ditched and the $3,500 he stole from the bank, he had to come up with some kind of code to let Burton know where to find the loot.  So he used athletes and their jersey numbers to give locations.

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The old Texas Stadium, soon to be put out to pasture in favor of Regrettable Corporate Sponsorship-to-be-Named-Later Stadium at Second-Name-Here Field, had room for exactly one malcontent in its rather unimpressive jail cell. However, that simply won’t do when $1.3 billion has been poured into a new taxpayer-funded beer garden with live sports.

(It’s hard to believe Adam Jones is being released by the Cowboys today; they finally finished his locker!)

Therefore, the Dallas Cowboys’ new home will have a desperately-needed upgrade in its new $200,000 jail: two drunk tanks and solitary confinement cells to boot, as well as “state-of-the-art” construction. (We imagine the art of jail construction doesn’t get much play at your modern art museums. Snobs.)
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Usually, if you’ve been accused of putting a hit out on a man who then ends up paralyzed after being shot multiple times in the abdomen by one of your homeboys, you stay away from the type of establishments where the incident happened. If the throwdown came after a rough soul food dinner, you stay away from Southern. If this was a Sopranos style hit, you’re probably not eating Italian any time soon. And for the sake of all that’s holy, if the whole scenario unraveled after a crazy night in a strip club, you really want to stay away from the nudie bars for awhile.

(Another year, another on-air controversy for Pacman. Remember Imus?)

Well, if you’ve come to those rational conclusions yourself, you’re not Adam “Pacman” Jones. The former top-10 draft pick turned face of the NFL’s prison image not only kept going to strip clubs after his arrest outside a Las Vegas joint, he kept going to them at rashly inappropriate times … like the night before a meeting with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, where he was going to present himself as a “strip-club free” changed man.

Now that Pacman has been dropped from yet another team, more details are coming out about just how his hit in Las Vegas was authorized, and just how often he visits nighttime entertainment usually frequented by ladies of the night. In his first interview since being released by the Cowboys — with CBS NFL host James Brown as leaked to THE SPORTING BLOG — Jones explained why he’s still willing to risk rather dire consequences to hang out in strip clubs: He just likes them.

Well, we should have all seen that coming.

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• Titans cheerleader Melissa: All about beauty, ballet & brain research.

• Coming soon to a cinema near you: Dennis Rodman & The Four Dwarfs.

• Will the Worldwide Leader defy the Free World Leader over the BCS?

• Speaking of ESPN, the freshly-cut Pacman Jones plans on bringing a lawsuit against the boys from Bristol.

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Wacka-wacka-wacka-wacka-wacka … beeoooooop, bop bop! Pacman will have to insert coins elsewhere, as his playing days in Big D are done.

(Pacman tries to pull a Tatum Bell before leaving Dallas)

Todd Archer of the DALLAS MORNING NEWS reports that the Cowboys are all set to release Adam “Don’t Call Me By That ’80s Video Game Anymore” Jones. Pacman (oops!) will be punted out of Valley Ranch on Friday, the first day that NFL teams are allowed to waive players.

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Sure, I’ve read over and over again about how bad the economy is. I know that people are losing their jobs, businesses are shutting down and people are hurting. But this story in the LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL really brings it home: apparently, things are so bad that millionaire athletes can’t afford to “make it rain” at Las Vegas nightclubs. Damn it, we’re bailing out Detroit, why can’t we bail out Las Vegas?

Branden Powers, a partner and director of marketing at Poetry nightclub at the Forum Shops at Caesers, saying that Vegas is “drying up” in terms of big money spenders coming to exclusive nightclubs. He estimated that business was off by 25 to 40 percent in December, and the practice of big shot athletes “making it rain” by tossing wads of hundred dollar bills into the crowd is almost non-existent:

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Not waiting for Roger Goodell to rule on their receiver’s recent raucous activities, the New York Giants have, ahem, jumped the gun and put Plaxico Burress on suspension.

The NEWARK STAR-LEDGER reports that the team has suspended Plaxico for four games, which coincidentally is the same number of regular season contests left on the G-Men’s schedule. More importanly, Burress has been placed on the non-injury football list - meaning that Plax can kiss any postseason play goodbye.

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(MOMMM! We found him!) Calvin Watkins of the DALLAS MORNING NEWS reports this morning that, “Suspended Cowboys cornerback Adam Jones will begin alcohol treatment today at an undisclosed location in the Dallas area, according to a source.“

Lest you think though that Jones actually has an alcohol problem. Or that he’s doing this on his own. Read more…

As somebody who hates the Dallas Cowboys, the last few weeks have been wonderful to watch as the team continues to implode.   From T.O.’s incessant whining about not getting the ball, to Tony Romo’s broken pinkie, and finishing with the latest suspension of Pacman Jones.

Pacman faces an uncertain future, as he’s been suspended for a minimum of four games, but there’s no guarantee that Roger Goodell is going to allow him to play again.   Obviously the best thing Pacman can do while serving his suspension is lay low and get out of trouble, so he’s decided to do just that.  His plan?   Why he’s dropped off the face of the Earth.

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NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell suspended troubled Cowboys cornerback Adam Jones for at least 4 games on Tuesday.  The move follows his alcohol-induced fight with a bodyguard on Oct. 8 in a Dallas hotel.  The suspension could last longer depending on his behavior, which we’re all sure will improve this time.

(Mr. Jones doesn’t just have issues, he has a lifetime subscription)

According to ESPN.com:

The decision on whether Jones can return to play this season will be based on his strict compliance with his NFL and Cowboys treatment plans as well as on evaluations of Jones’ progress that will be provided to Goodell by clinical experts retained by the NFL.

More after the jump. Read more…