Don’t Believe Anything You See Or Hear Anymore

At the rate things are going, we’re soon going to find out that Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny aren’t real and are just made up characters created to help sell toys and chocolate eggs. Remember a few weeks a go when there was a bit of an uproar over the fact the Chinese used CGI to enhance the opening ceremonies, and also had a little girl lip-sync “Ode to the Motherland” because the other girl was too ugly? Well, it turns out the Chinese weren’t doing anything new.

It seems that faking part of the opening ceremonies is quickly becoming a tradition, as it turns out not everything during the opening ceremony of the 2000 games in Sydney was real either. Much like your girlfriend, the Sydney Symphony Orchestra faked their performance as well.

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Performers Treated Like Rest of China’s Workforce

Everyone knows it’s tough to be a worker in China. Long hours, minimal recourse, and — for most in the country — tiny pay. China’s economic boom directly benefits from all of these factors, but that doesn’t make them any more palatable to outsiders.

So I suppose it’s no surprise that China’s Opening Ceremonies performers were treated in the national fashion. Unfortunately, being prima donna performers isn’t quite like being a wage slave at a provincial Nike plant, and now the performers are speaking out.

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China Uses Only 1 Race To Show Ethnic Diversity

It’s official: Nothing about these Olympic Games are real. Nothing.

In the latest post-Opening Ceremonies revelation, the DAILY TELEGRAPH reports that the 56 children chosen to represent China’s 56 ethnic and political groups for the ceremonies were, in fact, all Han Chinese. The Han make up about 90 percent of China’s population, and run the show politically in the billion-strong nation. Like I said, man - Nothing is real.

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China Protects The World From Ugly Little Girl

At the rate things are going, after Michael Phelps breaks Mark Spitz’s record of seven gold medals, he might want to make sure that the gold used in his medals is real. While the Beijing games have been spectacular so far, we keep finding out that more and more of what we’re seeing from China isn’t real. First we found out that during the Opening Ceremonies they went all Hollywood and used CGI to show us fireworks going off. The reasoning behind this was that without the enhanced computer graphics, the fireworks wouldn’t have shown up on television.

Opening ceremonies

So they just didn’t want us to miss anything, which is awfully sweet of them. Of course, missing fireworks isn’t the only thing China is concerned about. They also wanted to make sure we didn’t hurt our eyes during the ceremonies, which is why they wouldn’t let one girl sing during them. The reason for this? Well, she was just too ugly.

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Olympics Fireworks As Real As Lord Of The Rings

Remember that cool visual during the Opening Ceremonies on Friday of a helicopter tracking firework footprints going across the Beijing skyline, leading to the stadium? THE TELEGRAPH reported that it was lie, created by CGI and inserted into the broadcast coverage in order to spruce things up a bit. How would that make you feel about the reality you’ve created for yourself? I’m trying to free your mind, Neo.

The organizers claim that fireworks did happen - it would have been impossible (and too dangerous for the helicopters) from them to capture it live. So, they did the next best thing: spend six months working on CGI footage to insert into the broadcast.

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