When it comes to virile, 20-somethings inhabiting perfectly sculpted bodies, you really can’t have enough condoms. Half a million might sounds like a lot of latex, but in truth, an Olympic village full of sexy athletes can make quick work of a seemingly endless supply of prophylactics. Bow-chicka-wow-wow, indeed.

But this isn’t something new; according to former British Olympian Matthew Syed (handsomely pictured above), it’s a time-honored tradition as old as the Games.

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Maybe it’s the lack of a viable internet connection in Beijing, but it seems there’s been a veritable cloud of mystery surrounding the most important Olympic issue of 2008: How many freaking condoms are getting handed out?

It’s what we all want to know, and fortunately Mike Hayes at STEADY-BURN wraps it up succinctly with the news that it was not 100,000 as originally thought, but actually almost a half million condoms distributed in Olympic village. Bow-chicka-wow-wow.

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• Anheuser-Busch is willing to dive into a marketing deal with Olympic star Michael Phelps, even though the swimmer has a DUI on his record.

• A quarter of USC’s football players are jumped by a jock itch epidemic.

• One sore Swede slams his bronze medal to the mat after feeling wronged in his wrestling match.

• Toledo gets ready to welcome the second coming of Emeka Okafor.

• Canada’s still medal-less this summer? What’s that all aboot?

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