• Shawne Merriman & Tila Tequila have had quite the memorable week, haven’t they?

• Bengals QB Carson Palmer is worried that someone’s going to die in the NFL. Meanwhile, other Bengals QB Jordan Palmer has no worries about big brother’s USC squad beating the Buckeyes.

• Sounds like Danica Patrick will be racing over to NASCAR next year.

• Melanie Oudin had a great run at the US Open, although she could have done without the hotel eviction & her parents’ impending divorce.

• In the meantime, Novak Djokovic entertains the Flushing Meadows fans with his impression of John McEnroe - only to have the real deal come down & serve the Serb a lesson in an impromptu match.

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• Novak Djokovic delights the Monday night US Open crowd with his manic impression of John McEnroe - only to have Mac come down & reclaim his honor in an impromptu tennis match.

• A Kansas community is burned by the cold-hearted hazing of a high school football player slathered in Icy Hot.

• Kentucky fans are fuming at John Calipari because their coach dared send a Wildcats jersey to President Obama.

• A whole lotta football kicked off this weekend - even the lingerie variety.

• Ex-Notre Dame QB Blair Kiel is arrested after going on a drunken warpath at an Indianapolis Indians minor league game.

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Besides being a pretty good tennis player, Novak Djokovic has done quite well in performing impersonations of some of his courtly colleagues, such as Maria Sharapova. And after defeating Radek Stepanek on Monday night, Novak decided to entertain the US Open crowd with some mimicry of John McEnroe.

(Novak [L] doesn’t seem too focused, as McEnroe doesn’t take too kindly to Djokovic’s joking)

However, unlike Djokovic’s previous targets, Johnny Mac didn’t take such tomfoolery lying down. In fact, McEnroe came down to the court to confront Djokovic - and served up a challenge to settle things once and for all.

(Video after the jump.)

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Roger Federer is not used to losing. Ever. So his ongoing struggles to push above mediocrity are understandably trying not only to Federer’s tennis, but also his mental health. The most glaring proof of that came Friday in Miami, where Federer went Andre Agassi on his racquet, then decided his water cups were better suited to spend time in the stands than in his hands less than a set later.

(Photo proof of Federer’s racquet rage, from the MIAMI HERALD.)

Novak Djokovic — a Federer fire-ant past and present — was the culprit driving along this tantrum, which could be the sign of much larger issues for Federer. What started in an emotional meltdown after a memorable Wimbledon loss to Rafael Nadal is starting to get the feel of a grand unraveling, perhaps signaling the long slide of a 13-time Grand Slam winner back to earth.

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• Andy Roddick roasts Novak Djokovic in the Aussie Oven Open quarters.

(Novak can’t wait to get back to those shivering Serbian winters)

• Oscar De La Hoya paid $5 million for MMA event - and he didn’t even have to fight!

• A friendly reminder to Super Bowl attendees looking for adventure - the Tampa area does have a thriving gentlemen’s club industry.

• And if that’s too tame, there’s always prostitution - until you see the kind of Tampa trick-spinners the cops are dragging in.

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Hooligans: they aren’t just for soccer anymore! In what’s becoming a regular occurrence at the Australian Open, scores of ethnic Serbs and Croats have chosen a tennis match as the tableau to act out their anger in their centuries-old rivalry. The occasion on Friday was the third round match where Serbian Novak Djokovic beat Bosnian-born American Amer Delic. The SYDNEY HERALD SUN reports that at least 30 people were kicked out of Rod Laver Stadium, and one woman was knocked unconscious by a chair.

As you can imagine, alcohol was partially to blame. THE TIMES OF LONDON notes that the beer was flowing on the tennis grounds bright and early thanks to one of the tournament sponsors, always a guarantee to fuel bad blood. Let’s see: a bunch of drunken idiots hurling lawn chairs at each other until the cops show up to break it up? Sounds like every frat party I ever went to in college, except with the added bonus of racial strife and undercurrents of genocide.

Video of the melee after the jump:

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Tropical Storm Hanna is playing havoc with the US Open schedule today. In an unprecedented move, they had both semifinals going at once, with the Andy Murray vs. Rafael Nadal match moved earlier and to Louis Armstrong Stadium in a bid to beat impending rain storms. It didn’t work, as play was halted for the day in the third set.

It’s a break that Nadal must love, as he is down two sets to none to the surging Brit, although he is up 3-2 in the third. And while Murray is a compelling young player, CBS and the tennis world is hopig for a Nadal rally, as Roger Federer set up his half of a Wimbledon rematch by taking out Novak Djokovic in four sets.

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• Novak Djokovic jostles with the Big Apple crowd, “Who’s faking it now?”

But at least he still has Leryn Franco on his side.

• Vanderbilt vanquishes Steve Spurrier & South Carolina yet again, and even pours a little salt into the Gamecocks’ wounds.

• New coach, new players, new attitude - it all adds up to the same ol’ result for the Washington Redskins.

• Stephon Marbury apparently isn’t very helpful to his relatives.

• Something’s cookin’ with Vince Young, as the Titans QB hopes you can’t beat his meat.

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Novak Djokovic, just a year removed from becoming Flushing’s instant darling after unveiling his array of tennis impressions (he served it just like Sharapova! Uncanny!), has managed nearly as quickly to become more unpopular than Armando Benitez in the Big Apple.

After dispatching Andy Roddick in four sets in the US Open quarterfinals, Djokovic celebrated with a double-barreled Usain Bolt chest thump, then blasted Roddick in his on-court interview.

(Video of Novak’s post-match interview after the jump.)

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When we first learned of lovely Leryn Franco, we figured it would only be a matter of time before some well-known athlete would become smitten with the pretty Paraguayan javelin thrower.

And now a Serbian swinger has stepped up to the plate - tennis star Novak Djokovic has apparently fallen for Franco.

Although Djokovic has just started playing in the opening rounds of the U.S. Open, he can already claim the best trophy.

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