9:00 PM Cleveland Browns linebacker Christian Kirksey tweeted about a glitch in the Madden '15 video game that shows Kirksey as only 14 inches tall: "No matter how small you are, have big dreams, and live big!"
Okay, we have Mike Wood, a janitor in Green Bay who was fired after his superior apparently heard him say an untoward remark to Packers head coach Mike McCarthy. Without hearing another detail, we already have a pit rising in our stomachs, because well… here we go again.
(”I hold in my hand a list of 55 service workers right here at Lambeau who are avowed anti-Lombardists…”)
After all, it does seem a little unnerving that there’s a guy in Wisconsin… named McCarthy… calling for the heads of people who don’t support his cause enough. It didn’t end well at all. So let’s see just how bad this janitor’s behavior was, shall we?
All last-minute 11th-hour college football playoff protest lock-in petition candlelight vigils have failed, and the BCS has already declared who will play for the national championship. Sorry, Texas, Alabama, and Utah — two other states, Oklahoma and Florida, are going to the BCS Championship. Is it the right one? Meh, probably. But if we had playoffs, it might’ve been something weird like Texas Tech and Penn State. Yuck.
Looking at the BCS games:
• We have two teams outside the top 10 that are in the BCS? Well, hell, put ‘em in the same game! Unlikely Big East champion Cincinnati and ACC winner Virginia Tech will see each other in the Orange Bowl.
• This might be hard to believe, but Ohio State is in the Fiesta Bowl. This is not a repeat from 2006, 2003, or 2002. Honestly, why even have bowl contingency plans for these guys? They’ll play Texas.
• The last time Utah played in a BCS game, they got set up with BCS fall boy Pittsburgh and massacred them. This time they’ll get a slightly better challenge, facing off against Alabama in the Sugar Bowl.
• And the Rose Bowl. Hey, sure.
Now to go through the rest of the bowl games, one by one, in painstaking detail. Okay, just a couple interesting ones:
• Really? Does Charlie Weis wearing a lei this year represent anything that should happen in a fair and God-governed just world? The Irish went 6-6. Instead of schlepping off to some obscure game in Boise or Houston, Notre Dame gets the Hawai’i Bowl. No-foolin’ not-snowing beach-humpin’ Hawai’i. Since they play the local football squadron, odds are the Rainbowless Warriors will probably whump them, as is the local custom.
• Boise State, by going perfect, gets the high honor of playing not another strong power-conference team, but probably the next strongest mid-major, TCU, in the Poinsettia Bowl. Perhaps one of the most recently-created games will be the locale of the best non-BCS game. If nothing else, the bowl game will be a step up from 2006, when TCU smashed Northern Illinois by 30.
• “We beat the guys in the national championship game!” “Really? Because we beat the guys who beat the other guys in the national championship game!” It’s Ole Miss and Texas Tech in the Cotton Bowl.
• The MAC got five games. Five games? Northern Illinois and Western Michigan, too? Eek. As for Ball State and Tulsa, who both were supposed to roll in as the MAC and C-USA champs, respectively, they will lock helmets in the GMAC Bowl in a battle of Elisha Cuthbert-style sloppy seconds.
If I missed your favorite team’s game, I’m sure I did it for a good reason and/or to protect you. But no, seriously. Your team has a great shot to win the game. Here’s the master list of every single one.
Yes, the Giants and Titans also clinched the NFC East and AFC South divisions respectively, but the Arizona Cardinals also gave themselves a division championship by virtue of not being the Seahawks, 49ers, or Rams. They’re 8-5, a record which isn’t even guaranteed an AFC Wild Card spot. Six of their wins are against losing teams. Against winning teams, they give up over 32 points a game. The Arizona Cardinals win the NFC West, everyone. The lone argument in favor of implementing a bowl system in the NFL.
In other fuss-trating news around the lower 48:
“I’m very frustrated on the way, particularly today’s game unfolded,” Green Bay coach Mike McCarthy kinda said. That’s how the Packers’ official site transcribes it, but ‘R’ you sure about that ‘R’ in the word “frustrated?”
So here’s a fun one. Carolina Panther Jeremy Bridges was arrested — perhaps a first in NFL history — over a dispute involving champagne. THE ROCK HILL (SC) HERALD reports when it was uncorked, some other diners got sprayed. Although it doesn’t say in the story, I think you can assume what ensued. FOOD FIGHT!
Say buh-bye to Varitek, Red Sox fans. His agent says he will decline arbitration with Boston, and will talk with other teams. Of less consequence, Paul Byrd won’t accept arbitration either. The Boras has spoken.
Oh, yes, the Lions are still 0-something. The DETROIT NEWS looks at the depth chart, finds a little-known playmaking receiver named Calvin Johnson and asserts they have to throw it to them more if they’re going to win a game. Interesting idea!
Like we could go an entire Speed Read without previewing the upcoming NAIA football championship game. Mighty Carroll College, from Helena, Montana, has won five of six championships. The Saints opponent is the plucky University of Sioux Falls Cougars. Both teams’ colors are purple and gold. Oh, how embarrassing to wear the same dress to the debutante ball!
As we enter day number 4,320 of the Brett Favre Saga in Green Bay, all signs are starting to point to Favre not playing for the Green Bay Packers this season. Sure, he’s in camp with them, but he doesn’t want to be there and they don’t want him there. It’s kind of like when you break up with a girl, and even though both of you know you’re better off without each other, you keep sleeping together until something better comes along.
It seems that Brett has had an epiphany, though, because after talking to head coach Mike McCarthy and general manager Ted Thompson the grizzled vet is finally realizing he may become a distraction in Packers camp. (In other news, Paris Hilton just realized she has no talent.) You know, because this story and his on again-off again retirement dance hasn’t already been one. Brett’s also ready to admit that he’s just not as good as the one called Aaron Rodgers.
The MILWAUKEE JOURNAL-SENTINEL is looking out for you, the people. They understand that there’s a little exhibition baseball game going on tonight that you may have some interest in watching, instead of watching part two of the Brett Favre interview on FOX NEWS tonight.
The paper has obtained the full transcript of the interview, including the parts where he slams Ted Thompson, Packers’ GM for not listening to Brett’s suggested front office moves. Brett cites three instances where Thompson ignored him, 1) “I worked my butt off two years ago to try to get them to sign Randy Moss,” 2) Favre said he once tried to convince Thompson to re-sign Marco Rivera and Mike Wahle, two key linemen, but the two got away and signed elsewhere. 3) Favre told Van Susteren he tried to convince Thompson to interview Steve Mariucci, an old friend, for the head coaching job vacated by Mike Sherman. Favre said Thompson ended up hiring Mike McCarthy instead.
Favre says because Thompson didn’t listen to his suggested personnel decisions, he cannot trust him: Read more…
Last we heard concerning the rumors around Brett Favre’s un-retirement, Peyton Manning himself didn’t fully believe that the Packers QB had packed it in. And now Jason Wilde of ON MILWAUKEE adds further fuel to the fire by pointing out that Brett’s locker has been left intact.
Favre’s spot in the Lambeau locker room hasn’t been cleared out - but it hasn’t been encased in Plexiglass, either. So, why is Brett’s locker being left alone? Is it in tribute to a great Green Bay player - or is it due to sanitary concerns? Read more…