Speed Read: Cutler Spoils Brady Quinn’s Debut

Thank God we finally have Brady Quinn’s first start out of the way so we don’t have to listen to the speculation every week about when he’s going to get a shot and see that stupid NFL draft footage anymore. Why do so many people care? I mean, great, he played pretty well for Notre Dame against Navy and Stanford but got killed in every big game. Way to go, bud, I guess doing all that and playing absolutely no NFL football is good enough to get yourself a Fathead.

Brady Quinn

(Uh, dude, you know he voted for McCain, right?)

Brady did, however, have the Browns in good position to win last night, leading the Broncos 23-13 after three quarters. But Jay Cutler finally lived up to his own hype and got it done in the fourth quarter, like a certain other Bronco quarterback did a couple of times in Cleveland. (See, aren’t these Cutler-Elway comparisons just ridiculous?) Denver scored three touchdowns in the fourth quarter and won the game 34-30. Cutler threw for 447 yards in the game, and Quinn put up a respectable 239 yards with two touchdowns. The game was viewed by approximately 39 fans on the NFL Network, and 17 people on a choppy SopCast feed from Denmark.

Speaking of football games nobody could watch, #10 Utah rallied from an early 10-0 deficit and beat #11 TCU 13-10 last night in a game that was on some channel called CBS College Sports. Never did I think I’d actually be complaining that a game wasn’t on Versus. Since this channel isn’t part of my DirecTV package, I assume that it ended in exciting fashion. Actually, there’s proof that it ended in exciting fashion (and a Dan Fouts sighting!).

Dan Fouts

(”I used to be on Monday Night Football and now I’m calling Mountain West games on some station that 4% of the country gets.”)

Over on ESPN, Virginia Tech took care of Maryland 23-13, plunging the ACC into even more mediocrity. Freshman Darren Evans set a school record with 253 rushing yards. One of the odd BCS rules out there is that a non-BCS team can actually automatically qualify for a BCS game if they finish in the top 16 AND finish ahead of the winner of one of the BCS conferences. And never has this been more possible with the top ACC being currently ranked 19th (North Carolina) and all 12 teams in the league sitting with at least two conference losses. So just because Utah or Boise State loses a game or you think Ball State is too far down to make it, it’s still very likely that we’ll be seeing one of these teams on Fox in January.

There was a spectacular ending in the NBA last night in Portland that most of you on the East Coast probably missed. With the Rockets trailing the Blazers 98-96 with 1.9 seconds left in overtime, Yao Ming hit an 18-foot baseline jumper while he was being hacked to tie the game. He then made the free throw to give the Rockets a 99-98 lead. But Brandon Roy swished a rainbow 30-footer as time expired to give the Blazers a crazy 101-99 win. Check out the video:

• DEREK HAIL says that the Eagles’  Hank Baskett proposed to Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson at the top of the Space Needle in Seattle this past weekend.  I suppose I’m required by law to post a picture of her now:

Kendra Wilkinson

• Some dude is claiming to have made five holes-in-one in a week. No, it’s not Kim Jong-Il, it’s some guy in Illinois. The DAILY HERALD is buying it, but I’m a bit skeptical.

• Our favorite Indian pitchers, Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel, finally had their tryout yesterday. The ARIZONA REPUBLIC’s Jim Walsh has the details. In short, a lot of scouts think they deserve a shot, but nobody thinks it should be their team that gives it to them.

• The SAN DIEGO UNION TRIBUNE quotes Padres GM Kevin Towers as saying that Jake Peavy’s “train has left the station,” which means the ‘07 Cy Young winner is going to be traded soon. He also has a full no-trade clause.

• The Raider players are finally starting to speak out about all the insanity going on around them, and are telling it to David White of the SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE.

• The University of Oregon is debuting a baseball team this season. And you know what that means — ridiculous Nike uniforms!

Oregon baseball uniforms

The lines in the gray pinstripe uniforms are not actually solid lines — they’re the complete text of the university fight song.

• The Joe Calzaghe-Roy Jones Jr. fight this Saturday isn’t really captivating boxing fans. BOXING NEWS says it’s because the fight is such a mismatch in Calzaghe’s favor.

• The Brewers just picked up Mike Cameron’s option, but that’s not going to prevent them from shopping him to the Yankees for Melky Cabrera and Ian Kennedy, says MLB TRADE RUMORS.

• CNN says that some British guy claims baseball was invented in his country because Jane Austen referenced it in a book.  C’mon, let us have this one, England.

Charlie Weis is lucky to still have a knee, according to an AP report (via ESPN). He tore his ACL, MCL, PCL, GCL, and Florida State League. He also broke his femur. How is he supporting his body on that thing?

How many of the last 7 games will the Browns win with Brady Quinn at quarterback?

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Blogs: College Basketball Program Changers Dont Leave After 1 Year

• Don’t believe the hype: Doug Gottlieb of ESPN.com passes along the real program changers in college basketball:

Tyler Hansbrough bloody nose

• The WALL STREET JOURNAL judges if Shaq’s free throw ability makes for a good metaphor.• SLATE cancels their subscription, as they point out what’s wrong with Sports Illustrated.

• Just in case Nick Saban decides to bolt back to the NFL, PELICAN STATE SPORTS ranks which SEC coaches could do better rolling along the Tide sidelines:

Nick Saban

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS tosses one back, as Padres fielder Mike Cameron admits he’s played drunk before.• BURLY SPORTS has video of the greatest underdog story ever - the 2007 Boston Red Sox.