Dear 50 Cent: Marv’s Bite’s Worse Than His Bark

Diane Pucin of the LOS ANGELES TIMES has the delightful news that 50 Cent’s entourage roughed up Marv Albert as the broadcaster waited to guest on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night.

50 Cent's Entourage Roughs Up Marv Albert Before Jimmy Kimmel Live

 As Albert arrived, with an entourage of one, TNT public relations specialist Jeff Pomeroy, there was a sudden scuffle when a multitude of 50 Cent protectors seemed unfamiliar with Albert. There was shouting (”It’s Marv Albert,” yelled a Kimmel show guard, a pronouncement that seemed to have no effect on the 50 Cent phalanx.) There were obscenities. A fist or two flying. A “Don’t you put your hands on me” pronouncement.

And finally Albert made it to his waiting room, relatively unruffled but slightly puzzled. “Did you see that?” Albert said. “I thought they were kidding, but then I realized they weren’t.”

Ironic, when you consider Marv and Fitty have so much in common.

When you see Marv Albert, you think ..

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NBA All-Star Saturday: Not Easy Dunking Green

It’s something of a cliche: the All-Star weekend is a celebration of sport (laced heavily with a good ol’ dose of American capitalism).  However, moreso than any other sport, the NBA can lay claim to creating an atmosphere of joy around roundball during its All-Star days.

The Pro Bowl exists as a requirement and a paid vacation to Honolulu (which makes Miami next year an interesting experiment).  For the NFL, the Super Bowl acts as the party, though the nasty business of a championship at the end of the fortnight has the feeling of cramming for a final exam, something an All-Star weekend can avoid.

Dwight Howard at the NBA All-Star weekend

Baseball’s turned their All-Star Game into a vocation, demanding that this time it counts.  Why on Mantle’s green Earth would you make it count?  Not everything has to succumb to the gravity of the moment.  For example, turning the home run competition into the Battin’ Death March by ladeling the commercials on thick.

Dikembe Mutombo at the NBA All-Star weekend

(The NHL? Still a rumor, sadly.  Give it time, though.)

Saturday night at the NBA All-Star Game distills all of the fun into one structure for one night only.  Friday’s for the kids; Sunday’s the formality.  Saturday night is where people come to be seen, especially in their green power suits, and no one seems to be affected by gravity’s weak force.

And now a little photo essay about Marv Albert, Wolf Blitzer, Dikembe Mutombo, and a certain phone booth…
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Brog: N. Ryan Says Clemens’ Denials ‘Unfortunate’

Nolan Ryan appeared today on Dan Patrick’s syndicated radio show and made it clear that he in no way supports the PED-denials of fellow Texan Roger Clemens (audio): “It’s just a shame that Roger has gotten caught up in this situation and he took the stance that he did and that so many things have come out … that have cast a bad light on his career.

(Fallout: Clemens will never get his own “RC” logo’d pillbox lid)

More From The Xpress: “If you look at what happened with some of the other players (who used PEDs), they stepped up and said ‘hey, I did it, I knew it was wrong,’ and they asked for forgiveness and have gone on about their business. I think it’s just unfortunate Roger took the position that he did and that so much has come out about it.”

One thing we’ve learned from cases like Clemens, Mike Vick and Martha Stewart is that their lying denials have exacerbated reax to the discovery of their sordid activities - impeding the original particulars from vanishing into particulate.

Maybe not completely (esp. in Vick’s case), but safe to say we wouldn’t still be reveling discussing Clemens’ now-disgraced status in such detail if he’d just owned up - in the face of all the media needling.

If only all three had consulted Marv Albert.

Is it just me or has Patrick’s radio show gone from a dull-edged rehash of’s home page to appointment listening?

Nobody has been harder on the show than SbB, but between increased on-air energy, some new, competent sidekicks spiced in, and the odd newsmaker interview, Patrick may soon start clearing live major markets lower than 1790am on the dial.

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Blog-A-Rhythm: Marv Albert Doing The Soulja Boy

• AWFUL ANNOUNCING shows Marv Albert doing the Soulja Boy - sort of.

Marv Albert Soulja Boy screen capture

• Michael David Smith of AOL FANHOUSE learns that has caught another NFL player in another potentially embarrassing situation - this time it’s Terrell Owens lurking around the “Bang Bus“.

• Not happy with the “DUI” chants aimed at Carmelo Anthony, FIRE GEORGE KARL retaliates with their top 10 reasons to hate Lakers fans.

• LARRY BROWN SPORTS keeps a stiff upper lip, as the D-Backs’ Eric Byrnes is bringing back the ’70s porn mustache.

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South Carolina Newspaper Names Marv Albert Sweetie Of Sports Announcing

I’ve never been ashamed to admit that I lived in South Carolina for four years …

Marv Albert Sweetie South Carolina State Newspaper

until now.

Barkley Vs. Bavetta Is No Seabiscuit vs. War Admiral

BARKLEY CAN’T MAKE A BAVETTA ON VEGAS FOOTRACE: The particulars are set for Saturday’s extreme footrace between Charles Barkley, 43, and NBA referee Dick Bavetta, 67, and they go as follows:

– 235 feet will be the distance, from baseline to baseline and then to half court at the Thomas & Mack Arena.
– TNT, which will televise it as part of its All-Star Saturday events, will match the NBA and donate $25,000 to the Boys and Girls Clubs of Las Vegas.
– Marv Albert may have to do the call.

I have not really spoken to anyone who is rooting for Charles,” said Albert of the race. “It’s very sad; people just want him to have a depressing weekend.

We can’t find any Vegas book that has posted odds, but we’d have to go with the man who’s by far in better shape and only fears an occasional stuffed mascot.

No doubt, Barkley will bet heavily on his heavy self, lose, and then brag about it (ex. “I can afford to have a weight problem“).

Analyst Sam Wyche Wigs Out With Marv Albert On NFL Radio Broadcast

Analyst Sam Wyche to Westwood One radio partner Marv Albert on the Pats collapse last night: “The Patriots, who are usually unflappable, are suddenly flapping.”

Marv Albert Head Covers

Far from on-field analysis, Wyche was actually dropping in a stealth plug for the hottest new sports product on the market: Marv Albert headcovers.

MARV IDEA FOR ALBERT: Helpful hint for Marv A…

MARV IDEA FOR ALBERT: Helpful hint for Marv Albert - as he frantically searches for a legal, semi-hygienic activity to occupy himself during the long offseason:

Only drawback for the hair-helmeted one: punctures could hurt his chances of winning.

MARV IDEA FOR ALBERT: Helpful hint for Marv A…

MARV IDEA FOR ALBERT: Helpful hint for Marv Albert - as he frantically searches for a legal, semi-hygienic activity to occupy himself during the long offseason:

Only drawback for the hair-helmeted one: punctures could hurt his chances of winning.

The NEW YORK POST queried Jay Leno on which c…

The NEW YORK POST queried Jay Leno on which celebs have refused to go on his TV show because he poked fun at them in his monologue. Leno: "I made a lot of lace underwear jokes about Marv Albert, and he hasn’t come back."