WSU’s Football Program Is _____ (Fill In The Blank)

As any attorney can tell you, it’s very time consuming and frankly wasteful to have to write the same thing over and over again, when a standard form can be devised to make things much easier. THE DAILY EVERGREEN, the student newspaper at Washington State University, has taken this concept and run with it in its sports section. The paper unveiled its new fill-in-the-blank Cougars football arrest story last month, and the only question seems to be… what took them so long?

(”Hey — where is everybody?”)

With four Cougars’ football players either arrested or suspended from the team since May of this year — and 25 players arrested or charged with offenses that carry possible jail time from 2006 through 2008 — THE DAILY EVERGREEN decided to take this unusual measure. The result — at once sad and hilarious — is following the jump. (My favorite part: ____ was arrested for ____ after using a (circle one) frying pan /knife/rubbing alcohol/broken whiskey bottle to ____ ____.).

Read more…

Wazzu QB Passed Out In Truck At Police Station

Think about this question for a moment: If you were a 19-year-old college student who was drunk, where would be the one place you would choose to park your truck to sleep it off? If your answer was anything but “at the police station,” then you are smarter than Marshall Lobbestael allegedly was. KXLY-TV says Washington State’s top QB from last season was arrested Saturday morning and charged with being a Minor in Possession after cops found him passed out in his truck outside the Pullman police station.

Washington State QB Marshall Lobbestael

Perhaps the poor kid was just tired: after all, the cops had run into Lobbestael just an hour earlier in the College Hill section of town, carrying around a passed out female student. The unidentified coed was charged with MIP, and was joined a short time later by her “hero.”

Read more…