In the patchwork quilt of subjectivity that makes up the BCS, perhaps the most bizarre aspect is the coaches’ poll. While on one hand, it seems like coaches would be most qualified to judge the merit of one team over another, realistically, there’s no one coach or coaching staff who knows enough about the entire college football landscape to put together a good Top 25 without just pulling a “they’re high in the AP so whatever.”

(Is a comparison to Stalinist Russia just a little bit over the top? NYET, COMRADE!)

More importantly, the poll’s presence leaves the BCS selection process open to the undue influence of a handful of malicious coaches sandbagging a team out of contention. To that end, the USA TODAY has been publishing final coaches’ polls, eliminating any incentive to do so (unless a hypothetical coach really wants to spend time explaining to ESPN why he put Southern Cal at #22). So hey, glasnost’s working well, right? Great, let’s get rid of it!

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College football recruiting is a strange thing. Sometimes coaches turn to persistent calling to woo a superstar. Some text message nonstop. Others even rip off their shirts. Well, Georgia coach Mark Richt has his own unique approach: According to the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION, he prays for them.

(Steve Spurrier plays Abraham in Richt’s biblical take on SEC recruiting.)

Here’s what Richt told AJC reporter Michael Carvell when asked  how he handles the stress of recruiting:

“I put a lot of things to prayer, and this is one thing I put to prayer. I ask the Lord to ‘Give us the guys that belong at Georgia. The ones that don’t belong, work it out.’ I don’t get too bent out of shape with (recruiting), one way or the other. We’re going to get what we need. We’re going to get the right guys here.”

Well, that’s a new approach.  Does that mean that Lane Kiffin is the Lucifer foil to his recruiting Jesus act?

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Apparently a gator bites harder than a bulldog. Police say a couple in Neptune Beach (you were expecting anywhere other than northern Florida) got into a fight during Florida’s blowout of Georgia on Saturday. When he got his bags and tried to leave, she did what any self-respecting UF fan would: she bit him. Not gave him the tired old Gator Chomp gesture, but actually bit him. On the freaking thigh.

Veronica Hairston, pictured above with either a bruise or a Gators sticker under her eye (neither would surprise me), then allegedly punched her husband several times and fled from the Days Inn where they were staying. Come for the world’s largest cocktail party! Stay for the world’s funniest domestic abuse! Read more…

How big is tonight’s game between the White Sox and Twins in Chicago? So big that all of the fans are being encouraged to show up wearing the same color. Because, as we all know, that always works:

Ladies of Chicago, break out that pea coat you haven’t worn since 2003 ’cause it’s a blackout night on the South Side. 40,000 black towels will be handed out to fans as they enter the gates. It’s gonna be super awesome and intimidating to those weenies from Minnesota, where they’re all about that totally lame white hanky bullcrap. Let’s hear from the guy you want firing you up — White Sox vice president and chief marketing officer Brooks Boyer!

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The COLUMBUS (GA) LEDGER-ENQUIRER ten-huts, as five college football coaches will be making a special trip to visit recruits - of the Armed Forces.

Georgia’s Mark Richt, Auburn’s Tommy Tuberville, Notre Dame’s Charlie Weis, Miami’s Randy Shannon, and Yale’s Jack Siedlecki will be meeting & greeting with troops stationed in the Middle East.

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POLL NO LONGER MUM(ME) ABOUT WHO VOTED HAWAII #1: Tony Barnhart of the ATLANTA JOURNAL-CONSTITUTION found some fun tidbits in the final coaches poll of the 2007 college football regular season:

Most interesting was a first-place vote given to Hawaii, who needed a last-minute touchdown and last-second interception to defeat a 4-8 Washington at home late Saturday night.The undefeated and Sugar Bowl-bound Warriors were at the top of the list of Hal Mumme, head coach at fellow WAC member New Mexico State.

Meanwhile, some coaches were staying true to their school. LSU’s Les Miles and Oklahoma’s Bob Stoops each voted their own team #1, while Virginia Tech’s Frank Beamer and Georgia’s Mark Richt each had their squads at #2 - with Richt putting his Bulldogs ahead of LSU.Like Mumme, Big Ten coaches also kept solidarity with their conference, as all seven that vote in the poll had Ohio State ranked #1 - even Michigan’s Lloyd Carr.

Need some further help in deciphering the poll madness? The site POLLSPEAK attempts to rationalize some of the thinking by coaches, columnists and computers about who ranks where. They even nominate which casted ballots make the most sense & most nonsense.Such as voting Hawaii #1.