8:00 PM CSN Baltimore has video of Marcus Smith, a U.S. soldier who dressed as a minor league umpire to surprise his children at a Bowie Baysox game with a home visit from Afghanistan.
7:45 PM A Japanese Harley-Davidson motorcycle that was swept out to sea during last year's tsunami washed up on a shore in British Columbia last month. The bike's owner asked that the motorcycle be displayed at the Harley-Davidson Museum in Milwaukee as a memorial to the tsunami victims.
7:30 PM Buffalo Bills receiver David Clowneytweeted the results of his HIV test which came back negative. And to the critics of his decision to share his results, Clowney added: "Some people are Ridiculously stupid ... And can't see the bigger picture about things that are important in this world."
Not even back on the football field, and already Michael Vick is winning awards. In a poll I can get behind (although I don’t completely agree with the choices), Vick was voted overwhelmingly as the most hated man in sports. Data was collected by E-Poll, an Encino, Calif.-based marketing research firm, and reported by FORBES MAGAZINE.
As you have deduced from our photos above, Manny Being Manny and Alex Rodriguez placed and showed, and the remainder of the 10-man field is, well, interesting. A couple of glaring omissions, and couple of WTFs? And don’t worry: Isiah Thomas is there. Read more…
Well, Hank Aaron said that he’d like for 102 players who tested positive in MLB’s confidential drug tests to have their names revealed, and little by little he’s getting his wish. THE NEW YORK TIMES is reporting that Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs in 2003, throwing somewhat of a wet towel over Boston’s World Series championship season in ‘04 — which ended an 86-year drought.
FYI, it’s also Bud Selig’s 75th birthday today. Happy Birthday, Bud! We filled your cake with dog s***.
THE TIMES, sourcing “lawyers with knowledge of the results,” says that Ramirez and Ortiz join five other players, Barry Bonds, Alex Rodriguez, Sammy Sosa, Jason Grimsley and David Segui, who also tested positive for PEDs that year. Ortiz has continually denied that he ever took performance enhancing drugs. Read more…
Rickey Henderson’s upcoming speech after his Baseball Hall of Fame induction on Sunday has the potential to be almost as awesome as a dinosaur fighting a squid and a whale. After all, this is someone who used to scream “Rickey is the best!” while standing naked in front of a mirror in the clubhouse taking practice swings. Who used called Padres GM Kevin Towers searching for a job and left the following message: “Kevin, this is Rickey. Calling on behalf of Rickey. Rickey wants to play baseball.” And of course, who after breaking Lou Brock’s stolen base record, got on the mic and said “Lou Brock was the symbol of great base stealing. But today, I’m the greatest of all time.”
So imagine him getting to give a whole speech dedicated to the matter of his greatness? It’s staggering to think what might come out of his mouth. It’s like taking Mel Gibson out for a night of drinking and then asking him about Jews. But the SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS reports that Henderson is attempting to refine his speech, and some lucky college students at Laney College in the Bay Area are getting to help. For the past several weeks, he’s been practicing his speech in front of a public speaking class and receiving critiques from the students.
The teacher is former major leaguer Earl Robinson, who offered Henderson his help because even Henderson can admit that he needs it:
“Speech and me don’t get along sometimes,” he said. “I’m not a doctor or professor, so for me to go and write a speech or read a speech, it’s kind of like putting a tie too tight around my neck.”
Usually, it’s hard to accuse Rickey Henderson of an understatement, but to say that he and speech “don’t get along sometimes” is like saying Madonna’s face is starting to look “kind of weird.” So where does this leave us for Sunday? Because let’s face facts: it would be tragic if his speech was too good. But it appears that there’s no need to worry, as Robinson assures people that the speech is still all Rickey:
“He’s going to say what he feels,” he said. “How they interpret it, we’ll see. When he throws something out there, whatever else you hear in terms of him being critical of this or that, he overpowers you with the sincerity of his words.
“Like I finally said to him, just do the best you can. Let Rickey be Rickey.”
Yesterday we told you about how Manny Ramirezhit a game-winning grand slam on Manny Ramirez Bobblehead Night into the Mannywood section of seats. And for many people in Southern California, it’s probably a good thing that we did, because they sure didn’t get a chance to watch it on TV. That’s because, as the LOS ANGELES TIMES points out, Time Warner Cable customers missed the homer thanks to a roughly one minute service outage. Whoops!
One minute, viewers were watching the game. Then, they saw a frozen screen followed by back-to-back commercials, only to come back to Ramirez taking a curtain call because…something happened. Not that Time Warner cares about the dozens of angry e-mails and phone calls. I mean, it wasn’t that big of a deal.
Time Warner spokesman Darryl Ryan said that what occurred was “an inadvertent glitch.” He said it affected a “small number” of customers on L.A.’s Westside and the western San Fernando Valley. And, as if this will matter to that “small number” of customers, “it only took them away from the game for 54 seconds,” Ryan said.
Hey, it least you didn’t have the Super Bowl climax replaced by a porn scene. Or, perhaps it’s too bad that you didn’t, depending on if your wife is in the room.
Finally, are you ready for a sitcom called “Jock Itch”? If you said yes, then Dolphins CB Nathan Jones is your kind of man. (Also, if you said yes, please resume beating yourself over the head with a mallet.) Jones is executive producing the show, which he describes as “really ‘Friday Night Lights meets ‘Friends’.” Which I assume means that there will be a ton of cute talking, but no one will watch. Still, it’s an open audition if you’re interested.
POLITICO says former Bengals and Buccaneers head coach Sam Wycheis mulling a run for Congress as a Republican in his native South Carolina. I’m sure he’ll be ahead in the polls until Joe Montana’s last-minute entry into the race throws everything crazy.
YES Network’s choice for a “Yankee Classic” to air this weekend? Not one of their 26 World Series-clinching victories, or even a great game by Rickey Henderson. Nope, it’s their 9-8 win over the Mets from June 12, aka the Luis Castillo dropped ball game. All I know is that Tony Bernazardis ready to cut someone at the YES Network.
What is former MLB Troy Neel’s punishment for being the “most egregious child-support evader in Texas history” after fleeing the country for ten years in order to avoid paying more than $750,000 in support? Two years of probation. What ever happened to “Texas-style justice”?
The roster for the Los Angeles Dodgers’ Hollywood Stars celebrity game has been announced. With names such as Larry King, Tom Arnold, Tom Green and former Creed lead singer Scott Stapp, it’s a veritable Who’s Who of celebrities I’d like to see take a fastball to the temple, Ray Chapman-style.
The police car footage from Texas baseball coach Augie Garrido’s January DWI arrest has been made public, and offers many tips on what not to do if you’ve been pulled over after having “five glasses of wine.” Such as: tell the cop you are drunk, and volunteer that a DWI will ruin your career.
Killebrew was a contemporary of Mantle’s; each terrorized the AL en route to well over 500 home runs and both are members of the Hall of Fame, but there the similarities end. While Mantle’s well-known as a prolific party animal, Killebrew eschewed the lifestyle, telling SPORTS ILLUSTRATED back in 1963 that for fun, he “like[s] to wash dishes.”
So it’s that disconnect from Mantle’s world that provides the only possible justification for the ignorance displayed by Killebrew with that statement.
Sure Manny Ramirez most likely took steroids, and has been lying about it ever since. Most of his numbers are tainted. And he can also be a bit of a lout, as Red Sox traveling secretary Jack McCormick will be the first to tell you. But you know, there’s something about having your own likeness made into a miniature, bobbling doll that takes the edge off of your otherwise unsavory personality. One minute you’re taking a female fertility drug to come down from a steroid cycle, and the next you’re in a kid’s toy box with Buzz Lightyear and Talking Elmo. How bad can you be, really?
On Wednesday night at Chavez Ravine, it was as if Walt Disney had reached down from the heavens and penned the next big animated children’s feature, “Manny Being Manny.” Our hero, scratched from the lineup on his own Bobblehead Night by manager Joe Torre (voiced by Robin Williams) due to a sore hand, appeared as a pinch-hitter in the sixth and hit a dramatic grand slam, breaking a 2-2 tie and sending LA to a 6-2 victory over the Reds.
Manny hit the first delivery from reliever Nick Masset, a low line drive into, wait for it, the Mannywood section in left field. How perfect is that? Greg Brady and the rest of LA’s young Dodger fans sent home deliriously happy. Manny himself prancing about the clubhouse, admiring and playing with his bobblehead likeness.
“I’m going to send my bobblehead to left field,” he said to the LOS ANGELES TIMES. “It’s going to be in left field with Juan Pierre.”
That would probably result in six or seven fewer errors at that position over the course of the season. But I’m just thankful that the Dodgers went with the Manny bobblehead giveaway instead of one of their other ideas for Wednesday: A free home pregnancy test for the first 15,000 men in attendance.
It’s one of life’s cruel ironies that an (alleged) cheater and liar like Ramirez comes up smelling like a Rose Parade float, while on the same day, one of baseball’s truly good guys, Don Mattingly, is mired in crap. Mattingly, the Dodgers’ hitting coach, was distressed to learn that his 24-year-old son, Taylor, was arrested Tuesday night for pushing and spitting on his mother after she turned off his cable.
According to a Vanderburgh County Sheriff’s Office probable cause affidavit, Mattingly admitted jumping the brick fence of his mother’s residence on Darmstadt Road and confronting her. Mattingly told investigators his mother, Kim Mattingly, had sent him a text message insulting his girlfriend and his father, authorities said.
“Taylor advised he and Kim began to argue, and that Kim was being confrontational,” sheriff’s deputy Nathan Espenlaub wrote in the affidavit. “Taylor advised he snapped, pushed Kim down and spit on her.”
Taylor Mattingly also admitted flipping a patio table over and shattering another, breaking a patio door and window and throwing furniture into the walls of the pool house, according to the affidavit.
Kim Mattingly told detectives Taylor Mattingly had been upset with her over problems he encountered trying to trade in his car and a recent decision she made to cancel the cable service at the ranch where he was staying, according to the affidavit.
Of course as we may recall, Kim Mattingly is somewhat of a piece of work herself. Stay strong, Donny Ballgame. Your bobblehead day cannot be far off.
Meanwhile, those who exclusively depend on ESPN for their sports news were surprised on Wednesday to discover that the Steelers’ Ben Roethlisberger was involved in some sort of sexual assault lawsuit in Nevada. (ESPN reader: “I am shocked to learn this!”). Well dear ESPN reader, if the truth be known, the World Wide Leader in Sports is only now getting around to this news, two days after every other sports news outlet — including SI For Kids — first reported it.
ESPN: “Guilty your honor, with an explanation.” From PRO FOOTBALL TALK:
Now the network wants to explain their decision. ESPN spokesman Bill Hofheimer sent PFT a statement Wednesday night detailing the network’s position.
“Based on the sensitive nature of the story and other factors we mentioned, we initially exercised caution and did not report it,” the statement reads.
“Since then, we’ve been observing how the story has progressed, monitoring other news outlets, and doing our own reporting. We decided to report the story tonight.”
Look, I’m not going to make a big deal about this; ESPN can report what they like, and leave out the bits they find unsavory or not in tune with their corporate interests. It makes no nevermind to me. It’s just a little comical to see a headline like the one circled above suddenly appear, after the story had been totally ignored for two days. It’s like The Pope suddenly declaring in 2007 that the ruling against Galileo was an error.
It’s also a bit ironic that the alleged sexual assault occurred at Harrah’s Lake Tahoe, which has played host to some of the world’s finest magicians. Watch me pull a Ben Roethlisberger sexual assault story out of this hat! (Polite applause). And now, more poker!
OK, I’m just bitter that the one year I decide not to attend the American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament, all hell breaks loose. First Roethlisberger, then this, and then this. Next year I’m camping out on No. 17. Come by and say hello (will not sign giant inflatable body parts).
And speaking of righteous indignation and inflatable body parts, here’s CBS Sports columnist Gregg Doyel, who would like you to know that you’re a loathsome degenerate for looking at pictures of ESPN’s Erin Andrews on the internet. Seriously, why don’t you just haul yourself to your local police precinct and turn yourself in? You disgusting, malodorous pervert!
Doyel’s column begins like this. It does not get kinder as it progresses.
You’re out there. I just know it. You’re reading this right now, aren’t you, you stupid little boy? And you are a little boy. I don’t care how old you are — you’re not a man. Not if you’re one of the thousands, probably hundreds of thousands, maybe millions, of American males slobbering over the Internet for images of ESPN sideline reporter Erin Andrews.
You’re not a man.
What are these Erin Andrews images he speaks of? (Clumsily changes Erin Andrews’ butt wallpaper to photo of kittens).
And now, links to peruse as you slowly realize that Jamie-Lynn Sigler and Turtleis happening in real life. Noooo!
We told you the other day of Bolivian pro soccer coach Julio Cesar Baldivieso, who thought it a good idea to put his 12-year-old son, Mauricio, into a game for his team Aurora. Predictably, it wasn’t long before the young lad was taken out by a kick from behind. But until I saw the video below, I hadn’t realized just what a cheap shot it was. Smear the Queer! Message sent: This isn’t a daycare center, Julio. A 12-year-old being driven off the pitch in a cart while screaming for his mother is not a good way to promote your league. Forget about it, Jake. It’s Bolivia.
Another celebrity death, and this one is very hard to take, seeing that he has been a central character in all of my Super Bowl parties. The Taco Bell chihuahua, dead at age 15. May you rest in peace, folded into the warm, flour tortilla of the heavens.
Sure, you may think that the recent theft of 58 curling rocks in Australia is a victimless crime. But that’s before you find out that the rocks are valued at $400 each, making the thieves’ haul about $23,200. The rocks were stolen from a truck in a parking lot next to an ice rink in downtown Melbourne. Police in jumpsuits are using brooms to rapidly sweep the parking lot for clues.
In stage 17 of the Tour de France, Alberto Contadoris still in the overall lead, and is also still acting like somewhat of a dick. Lance Armstrong in fourth. Then there is Inspector Clouseau here below, whom I believe is in second place.
Is Jens Voigt’scrash during Stage 16 more horrific in German, or in French? You be the judge. Ack … YouTube pulled the French version. Well, Voigt was knocked unconscious after sliding about 20 feet on his face, but regained consciousness in the ambulance and should be OK.
ESPN acquires the rights to all five BCS games, plus the Texas Bowl, giving them 30 bowl games this year. Le schedule.
He should have got the Verizon Network. Former cruiserweight champion David Haye is officially snubbing Vitali Klitschko, and will instead get his heavyweight title shot against Nikolai Valuev on Nov. 7 in Germany. This after Klitschko’s manager, Bernd Boente, “couldn’t reach” Haye’s manager by phone to finalize a deal they thought they had agreed to for Klitschko and Haye to meet Sept. 12. I love boxing.
In the wake of the awful call at home plate on Monday night that ended the A’s 14-13 win over the Twins (go here if you’re not familiar with the play), the sports media world was spinning yesterday with varying opinions on the idea of expanding instant replay. I guess it was only a matter of time until a call was blown so egregiously at home plate that some people have decided that umpires basically can’t be trusted to get anything right anymore.
(Yeah, that’s not really even close)
Neil Velleman of TMR ZOO makes a pretty good case for expanding replay to cover close calls on the bases, as long as there’s a challenge system that is used in sports like football and tennis. Heck, every play at the wickets in important cricket matches is reviewed instantaneously using video technology to determine whether a runner is safe or not (this is analagous to using replay on the bases in baseball). I guess it is inherently silly that the whole world knew Michael Cuddyer was safe when he slid into home plate, and umpire Mike Muchlinski was the only one who didn’t see it. I’m all for letting officials use their best judgment in situations that require interpretation, but these kinds of plays aren’t really “judgment calls.” A player is either out or he isn’t, and if there’s a better way to determine that, why wouldn’t it be considered?
On the flip side, I can see the argument that we’re heading down the slippery slope of not using on-field umpires at all. There are automated systems in place now that can call every pitch a ball or a strike. If similar systems can be developed to determine outs on the bases and call balls fair or foul, why would we need umpires at all? You could also argue that if the bad calls are evenly distributed, everyone will benefit from them at some point. Sure, the Twins were victimized at the worst possible time, but they also shouldn’t have blown a 12-2 lead in the first place.
I just don’t want replay to ever extend into youth baseball, for the sake of future umpire baiters everywhere. I’m still proud of that time I really sold a tag at home plate with my glove when the ball was sitting like three feet behind me and I got the call. And, actually, the more that I think about it, I’m not sure I’m into this whole replay thing. What, is Ozzie Guillen going to argue with a machine? (well, he’s a bad example I guess)
Right after the All-Star break, the Phillies went to Miami for what was billed as a crucial four-game series that might swing the momentum in the NL East toward the Marlins and make the race wide open again. But after sweeping the Fish and taking the first two from the Cubs, the Phils have won 10 games in a row for the first time since 1991, and now look like they might be re-asserting themselves as the team to beat in baseball.
I’m not sure that Pedro Martinez is going to make all that much of a difference, but the idea that they could land Roy Halladay can’t make other NL teams very happy. And one of the biggest reasons for the team’s recent resurgence is Jimmy Rollins, who has decided to wake up after napping through the first three months of the season. Rollins is hitting .375 with a 1.039 OPS in July, which has still only managed to bring his average up to .238 for the year. But with all of the home runs the middle of the order is hitting, it sure can’t hurt to have their lead-off guy on base once in a while. Rollins homered last night, and Jayson Werth’s three-run shot in the bottom of the 13th won the game and kept the Phillies 6 1/2 games in front of second-place Atlanta.
The Dodgers blasted the Reds last night to win their fourth in a row and stay safely ahead of Philly in the race for the best record in the NL, but may have to go without Manny Ramirez for a couple of days after he was hit on the hand with a pitch. X-rays were negative, but he’s listed as day-to-day. Unfortunately, it might mean that he’ll miss his own bobblehead night, which is tonight at Dodger Stadium. Kaiser Permanente, the health-care provider that was originally the sponsor of the giveaway, has decided to withdraw its support because of his positive drug test.
The Red Sox continued their offensive woes last night, losing to the Rangers 4-2 and dropping a full game behind the Yankees, who beat the Orioles 6-4. Even worse for the Sox, Tim Wakefieldhas been put on the DL because his back is in too much pain to toss a 65-mph floater.
Now, here’s some links to help you pass the time while you wait for that solar eclipse:
• It’s a good thing TMZ got that Michael Jackson death report right, because they were way off on UFC fighter Kimo Leopoldo, who isn’t actually dead. Kimo confirmed his non-death to YAHOO!: “I knew I wasn’t dead.” Well, as long as he knows, that’s good enough for me.
• UNI WATCH says Ivan Rodriguezjust decided to change his uniform number to 77 out of the blue the other night. He had to abandon his #7 when he was traded to the Yankees (that Mickey Mantle guy wore it) and now can’t wear it in Houston because of Craig Biggio. So I guess he decided two 7s were better than one. It worked for Ray Bourque (once, anyway).
(What happens when photographer pregames with 5 fingers of Ancient Age)
When Manny first entered the field, he was met with an enthusiastic response from the cheap seats, but his reception in the box seat area was somewhat lukewarm.
(To our LAPD friends: Does this constitute a parole violation?)
(How do I look? No, really?)
I was just a few feet from Manny the entire night, and not once did he turn to engage the crowd. A little strange considering the circumstances, and the obvious enthusiasm of the fans.
We all know what a crap sports town Los Angeles is, but I was actually a little surprised to see so many empties last night at the Stadium for Ramirez’s return.
To recap, Albert Pujols does not take steroids — and to prove it, won’t you please accept this tube of scented bath gel and join him in the tub? Our Cardinals hero used the day before the All-Star game to reiterate his contention that his numbers are not chemically enhanced, and in fact he’s getting downright militant about it. Want to check and see? Seriously — Pujols will pee in a cup in front you right now.
Ever since December 2007, when it was reported by several outlets that his name was included in the Mitchell report - since proven to be false - Pujols has waged a one-man campaign to clear his name. And now, with his astronomical numbers at baseball’s halfway point, Pujols is on the offensive again. You may not be taking the juice, Albert, but your quotes are injected with hilarious goodness. Let’s proceed.
