Yes, Baby Racing Is Here; Will Civilization Survive?

Since the dawn of man, we’ve all asked ourselves the same question: How can we make our babies go faster? Of course the Lithuanians are the first to get a real handle on this, perfecting the sport of baby racing. Don’t ask about the pit stops, you really don’t want to know.

Baby racing

You may think that you have a fast baby, but you’ll never be sure unless you race him. And you can watch it on TV, but there’s nothing like going out to the track and listening to the roar of the babies live. There goes our leader now! Now where’s the beer guy? Read more…

Lithuanian Hoops Head: Black Players Are A**holes

Lithuania is a wonderful country. The historic architecture, the beautiful scenery, the horribly racist basketball officials. Whaaaaa? Yeah, we have our fair share of bigoted nutjobs in this country, but they aren’t the head of a major sports organization.

Valdas Garastas

(Humanitarian of the Year)

Looks like Valdas Garastas (pictured above) is going to be needing some of that diversity training. Garastas, the head of the Lithuanian basketball federation, is not too happy with the African-American players who have come to play in his country, and he’s not mincing words. He’s all apologetic now, but perhaps he should’ve realized that dropping n-bombs in the newspaper earlier this week might not turn out so well.

Ugly quotes after the jump.

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Rugby Team Strips Pride and Clothes in Lithuania

After a 48-0 drubbing by the Lithuanian national rugby team in their capitol of Vilnius over the weekend, the Austrian national rugby team put their heads together to think of a way to embarrass themselves further at one of the local alcohol-dispensing establishments. Of course, being rugby players, they thought of something: group nudity.

Austrian national rugby team strips

(Yes. Yes, they do. And much more, besides.)

And, thanks to an intrepid Lithuanian blogger, we have video. This one’s for the Ladies…. (Do not look at the video at work. Seriously. Don’t do it.)

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