Is Sox Fans’ All-Star Voting Fraud A Sinister Plot?

Everyone had a good old time with the campaign to get Rory Fitzpatrick onto the NHL all-star team. So it seems like a bit of harmless fun for a group of Red Sox fans pushing to fill the all-star team with Lastings Milledge and the rest of the Washington Nationals (through technically Milledge is with the AAA Syracuse Chiefs).

Red Sox Fans

Yeah, it’s a stupid little diversion. But are they stupid like a fox? Remember, the all-star game actually counts™ for home field advantage. So wouldn’t a fanbase so cocky about their team’s chances of making the World Series want to ensure their league has home field advantage? And what better way to ensure that than with the league-worst 7-18 Nationals?

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Dukes Fined by Nats for Charity-Related Lateness

Elijah Dukes, he of the life-threatening anger management issues, has been relatively harmless since he joined the Washington Nationals unless you’re an opposing pitcher.   His .323 average and two home runs in nine games have been a bright spot in another dim year-to-come for D.C. baseball.

Elijah Dukes

(Sorry; hugging is a fineable offense)

However, Dukes can’t seem to get any recognition of his newfound focus on the field.  First, he was told that he would have to come off the bench to make room for the immortal Austin Kearns. Once Lastings Milledge found his way back to the minors (to again keep room for the immortal Austin F. Kearns), he finally got to play more.

Now he’s back in the dead dawg house, though, for showing up five minutes late on game day yesterday.  He was benched, fined, threatened with demotion, and generally demeaned for setting a poor tone for the new and improved lousy Nationals.   So where was the malcontent?  He was signing autographs for Little Leaguers.

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Lastings Milledge Prefers Nats Apathy To Attitude

At one time, Lastings Milledge was one of the hottest prospects in all of baseball. At 21, he was the youngest player in all of baseball when the Mets brought him up in 2006, and he was a player with seemingly limitless tools. But one year later, the Mets had washed their hands of him, tired of his lackluster attitude, lack of respecPreview »t for the veterans and the “traditions of the game” and having to apologize for his X-rated rap songs.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photo

So he was shipped off to the Washington Nationals, who have since made him and fellow problem child Elijah Dukes the centerpiece of their rebuilding plans. And Milledge, for one, would rather be with the Nationals than the Mets, despite the 29.5 game gap in the standings between the two teams last season. Why? Because, as he told the WASHINGTON POST, the Nationals let young players approach the game the right way - their way.

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Brog: Nats’ Radio Ratings Less Than Park Crowds

Paul Farhi of the WASHINGTON POST reports Washington Nationals’ radio broadcasts this season featuring Charlie Slowes and Dave Jageler, “attracted a cumulative weekly audience of about 26,500 from May through July, the most recent period measured by Arbitron.

Washington Nationals Radio Broadcast

(We now join a Nationals Radio Broadcast, already in progress)

That means the Nats have the “unusual distinction of being a team that has far more people watching its games in person (average attendance has been 29,990 per game) than listening to them on radio.

The scary part? Farhi writes that the owner of the radio stations broadcasting the games says the ratings numbers are probably a little high:

Bonneville Int’l VP/News & Programming Jim Farley, whose company owns the stations, conceded that the “actual radio audience for the Nationals is ‘probably lower’ than the average reported by Arbitron.”

Farley added, “There’s no storyline for this season. Who’s the hero? Who’s the big star? Even the (famously terrible) ‘62 Mets had Marv Throneberry. The Nats don’t have a character like that.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photos

The Nats don’t have a character? Apparently Mr. Farley is unaware of Lastings Milledge’s Myspace page.

From The Basement Nationals Radio Ratings

(Great hed from WaPo - had to cap it)

The worst part of all of this is that Slowes and Jageler are being associated with those stinkbomb numbers. I worked as a MLB and minor league radio announcer for nearly ten years, and I can tell you that the contract status of broadcasters is often (inexplicably) tied to the success of the team.

I know of two cases in which the jobs of baseball announcers were probably saved by their team winning the World Series. One was the 2002 Angels, which featured the duo of Rory Markas and Terry Smith. Both are good guys (I worked with Terry on AAA Columbus broadcasts have met Rory a couple times), but were hired by the Disney regime. Rory and Terry had barely been on the job when Arte Moreno bought the club and as we all know, it isn’t uncommon for new ownership to come in and clean house.

But when the Angels won the Series, Rory and Terry were forever tied to that championship. Both remain with the club to this day. I’m not saying they definitely would’ve been let go when Disney sold the club, but from what I heard at the time, it was a possibility.

Another example was the ‘96 Yankees. I was working in the organization at the time as one of the club’s announcers for the AAA Columbus Clippers. There were rumblings around that time that John Sterling’s job status was less than rock-solid. But just as Sterling’s slippage was starting to be whispered about in broadcast circles, the Yankees won the ‘96 Series - and then began their championship run. And now Sterling is a Yankee for life.

John Sterling ice cream

(John Sterling, still a Yankees employee. Just be sure to not get behind him in the dessert line.)

I’m not saying any of the aforementioned deserved the pipe. I’m merely pointing out how the radio and TV broadcast biz really works. Besides a precious few, there’s no untouchables.

Today I’m starting a regular feature. Spotlighting the hottest sports ticket of the day.

For that, I’ve turned to the ultimate inside source, the largest ticker broker on the west coast, My Boy Barry: “The Dodgers disembark in D.C. to face off against the Nationals. With Manny Ramirez coming to town, maybe Nats fans will finally show up at their spiffy new ballpark for once. Also tonight, the Red Sox & Yankees renew their rivalry in the Bronx, much to ESPN’s relief. And Toronto hopes that Roy Halladay can sway the Jays to victor-ay over the Rays. Oy vey!

When I heard about Jenna Jameson’s “shock” over being pregnant, this is all I could think about (real media file).

Scarface Michelle Pfeiffer

Scarface fans know where I’m going with this. Listen to the end of the clip if you can’t figure it out.

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Blog Roll: Chelsea Jammin’ With Jenna Jameson

• WITH LEATHER finds Chelsea trading the pitch for porn stars, as the English soccer team parties with Jenna Jameson.

Jenna Jameson Preying Mantis Lingerie Bowl

• BABES LOVE BASEBALL apply their Voodoo Sabermetrics to Nationals center fielder Lastings Milledge.

• Michael David Smith of AOL FANHOUSE wonders why the mainstream media is virtually ignoring Karl Malone’s possible statutory rape allegations.

• DEADSPIN wants to know if you approve of John Salley’s media work.

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New Mets Ballpark Panned By Feng Shui Expect

OUR DOWSING RODS WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH MR. MET: The NEW YORK POST recently had a feng shui expert, someone named Judith Wendell, evaluate the two new ballyards coming to New York: Citi Field and the new Yankee Stadium.

Citi Field

Apparently Ms. Wendell’s study concluded before Hank Steinbrenner picked out his corner office, as the Yankees’ new address got passing grades from the charlatan proprietor of the fake Asian tradition. And in a major upset, one of the facilities was scolded for a misguided design.

Feng Shui

Despite not even been allowed into the stadium, Ms. Wendell, who appropriately was “accidentally sprayed by a passing water truck” as she inspected Citi Field’s construction site, said her “dowsing rod” picked up “disturbed energy“.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photos

But of course there’s a perfect explanation for the downturn of her dowsing rod. She had obviously struck upon the future locker location of Lastings Milledge.

Lastings Milledge Rap Song Sexual Vulgar Lyrics Brings Apology From New York Mets

WHERE IS REVEREND AL AND JESSE WHEN WE NEED THEM? The NEW YORK POST reports that (fading) Mets outfield prospect Lastings Milledge, better known as “L Millz” in the rap world, has released a potty-mouthed song on his own record label called “Bend Ya Knees”.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photos

The song, which also features rapper Manny D, “has lyrics ripe with vulgarity, demeaning references to women, explicit sexual content and multiple uses of the n-word.

Lastings Milledge Manny D

To the club’s credit, the Mets quickly issued a statement “condemning a song from a record company that, according to the company’s Web site, is co-founded by Lastings Milledge and features him on the track.The website in question:

Lastings Milledge

The rapper Manny D is apparently a former junior high school classmate of Milledge, who is the co-founder of Soulja-Boi Records and also the manager of the central casting walking cliche grilled-out rapper.It is also interesting to note that the record company’s myspace account has been deleted - but you can still check out the amusing page of Manny D.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photo

And sadly, Milledge has completely fouled up his personal myspace page which we had become so partial to.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Features Topless Shots Webcam Girlfriend

MLB PLAYER MILLEDGE IS MYSPACE, WEBCAM ENTHUSIAST: THE BIG LEAD tips us off to the Myspace page of baseball player Lastings “Da Edge” Milledge, who is an outfielder for the New York Mets minor league club in New Orleans.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photos

Milledge spent the first couple weeks of the season on the bench with the Mets, so apparently he had some spare time to upload these fantastic photos.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photo

The page also gives us a glimpse into Milledge’s dating life, with his apparent girlfriend “Rachel” listed as his top friend.

Lastings Milledge Myspace Page Photos

Rachel looks to be a Florida State cheerleader/dancer of some sort. And she’s also a webcam enthusiast:

Milledge Webcam Myspace Page