So, Charles Barkley, Stuart Scott & Mr. Belding walk into a bar…

• Drunken Jaguars DB Brian Williams rants & raves & threatens arresting officers - then offers them to have sex with his date.

• A pair of Portland State basketball players were accused of brutally beating a tour worker in Mexico.

• When out on the course nowadays, John Daly needs to have his nipples kneaded.

• Diners get medieval in trying to obtain Rashard Lewis’ autograph.

Read more…

We’re soon moving back to Los Angeles. We’re going to miss the weather here in Miami, but at least we have something to look forward to in SoCal this summer: Larry Bowa.

We’re thinking the Dodgers may finally push through and do some serious damage in the NL playoffs this season. But more important is the well-mannered gent manning the third base coach’s box for the club.

Bowa last night was involved in what umpire Ed Montague called, “One of the dumbest ejections I’ve ever had.” Of course, we loved every minute of it. Read more…

When trying to get A-Rod the biggest baseball contract in history, Scott Boras went by the book - a really big book:

YOU BEEN BLINDED reads up on the efforts made by the uber-agent to sell his client. Back in 2000, Boras put together a huge binder showcasing A-Rod’s statistics and mailed it out to all 30 teams. The big blue book included Alex’s performance against former and current players, and even contained quotes from such baseball buds as Larry Bowa & Dusty Baker.

Did the literary launch work? Well, A-Rod signed a $252 million contract with the Texas Rangers. Must have had some avid readers down in Arlington.

Now 7 years later, A-Rod isn’t speaking to Scott, and has signed with some new reps. Looks like Boras might soon be working on a new book - of the tell-all variety.

TORRE TO JOIN DODGERS WITH 3-YEAR, $15 MILLION DEAL: The WESTCHESTER (NY) JOURNAL NEWS reports that Joe Torre is close to signing a 3-year deal to manage the Los Angeles Dodgers:

The contract is expected to be worth $15 million, and an official announcement could come as soon as Wednesday.Events in motion were sped up when Grady Little bolted from the Blue Crew on Tuesday, stating his resignation was a “mutual decision” between himself and the front office.

If the deal goes through, Torre will likely bring along Don Mattingly as his bench coach. And the ex-Yankees manager is also eyeing current New York 3rd-base coach Larry Bowa to Go West, Old Man.With Torre’s employment saga splashed across the sports pages, METSBLOG takes a nostalgic look back when the skipper was peeled off of the Big Apple’s other major league team:

The Torre story doesn’t get into full gear until two minutes into the clip. But the 1981 TV commercials are amusement enough, such as ads for Sasson jeans, and Leonard Nimoy doing voice-overs for Bell Telephone. Fascinating.