6:17 PM Cincinnati WR Chris Henrysuffers a broken forearm during the Bengals' 17-7 win over the Ravens, and could be out for the rest of the season.
5:53 PMPeyton Manning becomes the first NFL QB to throw for 40,000 in a single decade, and his 125th career win ties him with Frank Tarkenton at 4th on the all-time QB victory list. Jim Caldwell also becomes the first NFL coach to start his career 8-0 since 1930.
Much has been said and written about Alex Rodriguez’s mighty ego, but did we ever think that it would reach, literally, mythic proportions? In the greatest item I have read today, US WEEKLY tells us that a former Rodriguez girlfriend says that the Yankee had two portraits painted of himself as a centaur, and that they’re hanging over his bed. Enjoy that nightmare fuel, America.
As we know from our mythology, the centaur is a half-human, half-horse composition caught between the two natures, often pestering other gods such as Hercules. The ancient Greeks tell us that it was born when the god Centaurus mated with a horse. Yes, there’s a lot of that going around, even to this day. At least if you live in South Carolina. Read more…
Are you serious, Minka Kelly? You’re going to get into a tussle with the crazy chick who starred in “Bride Wars”? Apparently there’s some sort of rift brewing between Alex Rodriguez’s celebrity starlet girlfriend, Kate Hudson, and Derek Jeter’s celebrity starlet girlfriend, the aforementioned Miss Kelly. Yankee wives are choosing sides, Page Six is snooping around … New York will be out of first place within the month!
It’s hard to know who to root against here. Hudson starred in “You, Me and Dupree” (minus 12 points), “Almost Famous” (plus 15 points) and “Fool’s Gold” (minus 1,000 points). Kelly has been in “Devil’s Highway,” (minus 10 points), “Friday Night Lights” (plus 15 points) and an episode of the Nickelodeon TV series “Drake & Josh” (minus 45,000 points). Knowing these facts makes me too ashamed to even do the math.
(More photos of the feuding females after the jump.)
Sure, when Alex Rodriguez and Kate Hudson started dating (and we dutifullylowered ourselves to covering it), we figured it was a matter of “aw look at these kids and their affection” style dating. As most new relationships go, y’know.
(Kate, you’re looking womanly. That won’t work.)
Oh, but this is a story about men and women in their 30s. Specifically, women, aged 30. And when it comes to relationships, there’s one thing they want: BABIES. So incredibly, Hudson has reportedly approached A-Rod about a pregnancy - but as what appears to be a business deal.
Boy, seems like a while since we’ve had any crazy A-Rod news, doesn’t it? Turns out that when the Yankees are actually playing good baseball on the field, the New York media doesn’t need to squeeze back-page headlines out of every move Rodriguez make and every word he says.
The latest rumor to make the rounds about the Yankees’ purple-lipped slugger was that he’d been seen getting mighty close to actress Kate Hudson. But yesterday, it went from gossip page fodder to Real News, and so here we are.
Say what you will about Madonna; at least she had Alex Rodriguez home by bedtime. I wasn’t going to write anything about this brewing A-Rod late night carousing story, because staying out until 2:30 a.m. for a pro baseball player isn’t that big of a deal, even if you have been benched due to fatigue. One man’s 2:30 a.m. is another man’s 9 p.m., depending on when you started your day; it really doesn’t matter as long as you get your eight or nine hours of Sealy Posturpedic Beauty Sleep.
But this is too good to pass up. Our protagonist, apparently still not fully recovered from injecting illegal dr a hip injury, was struggling through an 0-for-15 electrical outage when he was benched for the Yankees’ two weekend games with the Marlins, due to “fatigue.” He was then seen out on the town Saturday night with girlfriend Kate Hudson. And not in the “let’s see a PG-rated movie and have a quick bite of dinner” kind of way, as it turns out. Lap dances, anyone? Read more…
I have sad news: Your oversized Madonna photos are officially obsolete (”Why?!” *sobbing*). But cheer up, Yankee haters, and get to work on those Kate Hudson masks, pronto. America’s favorite steroid abuser has been seen canoodling with the engine that drove “You, Me and Dupree” for the past couple of weeks, but now it’s more or less official. They’re a couple.
Say want you want about Rodriguez, but it takes a brave man to invite both the taunts of Yankee opponents and the terrible wrath of Madonna. One can only assume that he saw “Bride Wars” and determined Kate was the more imminent threat. Read more…
The best part about this headline, in truth, is that it’s not even the first time we’ve been able to connect Eddy Curry with a preposterous legal suit in the past month. Remember this? Still, as bad as a two-year-old Big & Tall clothing bill is, this takes the cake: According to this story in the NEW YORK POST, the oft-injured and always overpaid Knicks center is accused of trying to solicit gay sex from his chauffeur, whom he also made touch his penis, clean up towels he had ejaculated into and whom he called a, “f**king Jew”, “white slave”, “white devil”, and “grandmaster of the KKK”. Oh, and when the driver complained, Curry pointed a loaded gun at him and threatened to kill him if he spoke.
(Nothing is coming up Eddy anymore. That’s for sure.)
Yes, folks, that’s about as good a story lede as you can get. Just imagine the eyes on the reporter who tripped across this court filing. “Oh, look, a Knicks benchwarmer is getting sued. Hmm, wait a minute! Gay sex! Racial epithets! He makes $9 million!! Someone get me the executive editor!”
For your reading pleasure, here are the best lines from the suit, carefully culled by the POST:
The stunning court papers claim Curry, a married father of three, repeatedly approached chauffeur David Kuchinsky“in the nude,” allegedly telling him, “Look at me, Dave, look” and “Come and touch it, Dave.”
In a disturbing episode reminiscent of some of the evidence in the manslaughter case against former Nets star Jayson Williams, Kuchinsky further claims in his suit that Curry pointed a “fully loaded” gun at him on at least two separate occasions to keep him from complaining about his treatment. “Look, I have one in the chamber,” Curry allegedly said.
Exactly how many of the allegations Curry fulfilled is up for debate, but — as with the Duke rape case — at the very least he was doing things that weren’t advisable. Note to self: Don’t call any future butlers grandmaster of the KKK”. Oh, and don’t make them butlers if you’ve only hired them to drive you around.
However, what might be the most astonishing thing about the suit, is just how little David Kuchinsky, the driver in question, is asking for. The POST claims that he wants $98,000 — $68,000 in unpaid wages and another $25,000+ in unpaid expenses from Curry — and “compensatory damages” from the center. Look, we’re not genuises here, but $98,000 is chump change for a guy whose been making $9 million a year. Sure, it’s good money, but if you’re Curry, don’t you just settle that suit as fast as humanly possible? You whipped it out on the guy repeatedly and made him clean up your masturbatory mess, and all he wants is a measly $100G? Seems cheap at the price, if you ask us.
“Instead of paying him, they discriminated against him, figuring that it would keep him there,” said Kuchinsky’s lawyer, Matthew Blit. “Imagine going into your boss’s office … and he stands up and drops his pants and he asks you take care of him. Those actions are unacceptable whether it’s in a corporate office or a private home.”
It’s worth noting that Kuchinsky does have a checkered past — he served a three-year prison sentence for a 1992 burglary in New Jersey — and that Curry’s lawyer, Kelly Saindon, says that the suit is the culmination of a series of blackmailing threats from the former chauffeur.
Still, if any of these allegations are admitted to or proven true in a court of law, it will solidify one thing: Curry is the human equivalent of canine feces. Yes, we’re calling him dog crap. He can take his 2:38 of game action this entire season and shove it. Or maybe Kuchinsky can do that for him. He might like that.
There was more NBA news, but alas, it was much less inflammatory, degrading or insulting. Still, it was pretty entertaining. Following a second-straight win over Toronto, snapping the team’s previous elongated losing skid in the process, Celtics center Kevin Garnett felt comfortable enough to loosen up in a postgame presser and go Christopher Reeve on everyone. Here’s the video:
Is it just us, or does Paul Pierce always seem like KG’s red-headed step-cousin in the interview room? Garnett steals the stage even when he’s trying to deflect praise, all of which makes the dual-mic pressers even more awkward, and more entertaining in the process.
Also, if you haven’t seen him play yet this year, now might be a good time to check out Oklahoma’s Blake Griffin. Here’s a lowdown of what he does well: Everything inside the three-point line. Here’s what he does poorly: select earphones. Did anyone see the earbuds he was using during a pre-game shootaround before Monday night’s win over rival Texas, a victory which snapped a six-game Oklahoma hoops losing streak against the Longhorns? They were either A) really old iPod earbuds or B) ripoffs of iPod earbuds. We couldn’t see “COBY” on them, but they had all the tell-tale signs. What, he can’t afford any Bose or Sony in-ear headphones? And what about the Nike ‘phones that are allegedly “designed for athletics”. Nike sponsors OU and they won’t comp a future top-10 pick a pair of headphones?
(Hmmm. Blake Griffin. Think he’s from Quahog, R.I.?)
You know all those horrible chick flicks they put out with a hot actress — say, Kate Hudson — who is torn between two perfectly affable potential lovers and friends? Well, in this one, the two guys are played by PGA stud Adam Scott on Alex Rodriguez. Oh, and it’s actually happening.
Remember the old codger of a Hall of Fame voter in Tuscon who openly forgot to vote for Rickey Henderson? Well, ol’ Corky Simpson is taking out his frustration on the interwebs. We’d give you his home address and email if we had it … so come back soon. We should have it by lunch (gotta love the interwebs, even if Corky doesn’t).
There is no way Ed Rendell will ever win another election in Pennsylvania; he just simultaneously jinxed both the Steelers and Eagles with one, ferociously stupid blow.
Rendell might get off easy if it’s really snowy in Pittsburgh and the Ravens slog out a gross game. That’s more than you can say for the Spanish soccer fans in the video below.
There have been plenty of self-assured hurrahs about the Colts’ new coach after Tony Dungy’s retirement, with Jim Caldwell lauded as the perfect replacement waiting in the wings. Well, did anyone think to check out his record at his last stop? SHUTDOWN CORNER did. Guess what: It isn’t pretty.
Speaking of the Colts, if things keep going down this path, Dungy might not be the only constant Indianapolis face leaving town. Marvin Harrison might be gone, too.
