Recently, locker rooms across baseball and football have struggled with MRSA outbreaks similar to those in hospitals and elder care centers, requiring the affected areas to be sanitized multiple times to remove the Staphylococcus.

(Not pictured: the victim)

The Detroit Tigers should consider bringing in similar sanitation experts to work their magic on all rooms that their players use regularly both in Lakeland, FL, and Detroit. That might be the only way to eradicate whatever viral agent infects their relief pitchers and encourages ridiculously stupid and short-sighted decisions like trying to punch a door with the pitching hand.

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