How much do you spend every year on motor oil? I’m going to go out on a limb and say that it’s probably less than $1 million, which is what NASCAR’s Joe Gibbs Racing spends every year trying to perfect the oil it puts in its cars. With the oil experimentation going on for a decade, that’s about $10 million spent on something you and I spend $19.99 for every four months at Jiffy Lube.
So why all the cash on such a seemingly minor detail? Well, NASCAR essentially requires all cars to be equal, even going as far as limiting innovation so as not to give one team an advantage over another. But one area where teams are free to do whatever they want is oil. And if you thought getting KFC’s secret recipe was tough, don’t you dare try and figure out what’s lubing up Gibbs’ engines.
Redskins fans can sleep a little easier, knowing their team isn’t the only train wreck caused by Joe Gibbs recently. Showing why he’s an owner and not a driver, Gibbs managed to cause a two-car pileup in a two-car race. I know rubbin’ is racin’, but maybe it’s not the best idea to run the primary sponsor of your NASCAR team off the road?
Gibbs and Interstate Batteries chairman Norm Miller took to an Arena Racing track for a friendly, 10-lap race this past weekend in Hampton, Va. The two had raced each other in boats before, but never cars. Now we see why. Gibbs drove like he was going to be late for the early bird special at Old Country Buffet.
Video after the jump.
LaVar Arrington hates Joe Gibbs. Clinton Portis hates Jim Zorn. Everybody hates Dan Snyder. Yes, it’s a great time to be involved with the Washington Redskins, as a once-promising season goes down the drain and even local governments don’t want anything to do with the team.
Nearby Loudon County, Va., home of the Skins’ training camp and corporate offices, voted to have nothing further to do with the sinking ship. The Board of Supervisors voted against a sweeping partnership with the team that could have led to a Redskins Hall of Fame. For what seems like it might’ve been a pretty good tourist draw, Loudoun demurred over the matter of $100,000.
Post-football life for a ex-NFL player is a time to finally relax. While their careers end at a relatively young age, their bodies, like porn stars, have taken on an extraordinarily amount of mileage in a short period of time, leaving them hobbled with arthritic knees and stiff wrists, also like porn stars. So it’s common for most of them to just kind of take it easy and live out their golden years quietly. Thank God that’s not the case for former Redskins linebacker LaVar Arrington, who still has plenty left to say.
In a compelling read over at THE WASHINGTON TIMES, we’re taken through what Arrington has been up to in the 2+ years since his career was ended by a combo Achilles tendon explosion/motorcycle wreck. After discussing his latest string of eateries and other entrepreneurial ventures, he opens up about his football life, specifically by talking hilarious trash about Dan Snyder and Joe Gibbs.
• DEADSPIN checks the want ads, and discovers that the Sun-Timesless Jay Mariotti might be looking for a web designer.
• FROM THE MARBLES feels scalped in listening to Joe Gibbs make a lame Redskins joke during his RNC speech last night.
• Inspired by Chad Johnson’s name change to Chad Ocho Cinco, NEXT ROUND suggests some other surname switches for certain NFL stars.
• UNCOACHED catches one Virginia fan showing his sons some of the finer fun activities of tailgating - such as a rousing game of beer pong.
The NFL season opener featured the defending Super Bowl champion New York Giants against their NFC East rival, the Washington Redskins. And It was like Joe Gibbs 2.0 never left. The new guy, Jim Zorn, was supposed to bring all this new energy, a new way of doing things, a new offense, so on and so forth.
All ‘Skins fans got was more of the same: inept play-calling, a barrage of penalties, seven measly points and a loss. As usual, this is all owner Dan Snyder’s doing. And Tom Cruise. I’m sure he’s somehow responsible.
The WASHINGTON POST reports today that “according to Redskins sources” Joe Gibbs has resigned. A press conference will be held this afternoon to make the news official.
DC-based MISTER IRRELEVANT thinks that former Buffalo Bills head coach and current Redskins defensive coordinator Gregg Williams could be the next Washington coach, but the Post reports “No decision has been made on a replacement for Gibb.”
UPDATE: The Post is reporting that Bill Cowher is #1 on Dan Snyder’s hit list to replace Gibbs.
• Now that Tampa Bay has rid themselves of the ‘Devil‘, the WASHINGTON POST reports the Rays are also hoping to ship Elijah Dukes to the Nationals:
• BLOOMBERG throws down the gavel, as ex-NFL commish Paul Tagliabue is heading back to his ol’ law firm.• THE WORLD OF ISAAC throws the flag at Joe Gibbs, whose end-game blunder led the Redskins to another loss.
• Now that Les will stay Miles away, the DETROIT FREE PRESS reports that Michigan is measuring the MAC, as the school appears interested in Ball State’s coach:
• Speaking of job openings, the LOS ANGELES TIMES looks over the short list of candidates who might wander into Westwood after Karl’s cutting.• NATION OF ISLAM SPORTSBLOG is happy to see Don Imus back on the air, especially with some new p.c. sidekicks.