It turns out that maybe the Manila police and Philippine Army knew something about Manny Pacquiao that the rest of us didn’t ahead of his “Super Fight” against Oscar De La Hoya. Like that there would be good reason for the people of the Philippines to be celebrating on Saturday night, because despite having a huge size and weight disadvantage, Pacquiao would be too fast, too smart and - yes - too strong for the aging Golden Boy.

Whether they were prophets or just looking for a night off, their hero lived up to his end of the bargain, beating De La Hoya’s to a pulp before forcing his corner to throw in the towel before the start of the ninth round. (It was so bad that Jim Lampley was practically in tears at one point while describing how Pacquiao was “rearranging De La Hoya’s beautiful face.” Get a hold of yourself, man.)

Read more…

Floyd Mayweather Jr. is retired from boxing, but that doesn’t mean he’s retired from talking. The outspoken pugilist gave the first interview of his post-boxing life to The Grand Rapids Press and covered a wide range of topics.

Money Mayweather says he loved playing the role of the villain, and he’s really retired from boxing. His most interesting comments were directed towards HBO’s boxing coverage and the announcers in particular. Read more…

OSCAR SCORES $25M+ IN SCRATCH WITHOUT A SCRATCH: It was a Cinco de Mayo to remember for boxing fans here in Los Angeles last weekend as our favorite son, Oscar De La Hoya, once again proved why he is such a universal favorite in the hard-scrabble streets of East L.A.

Any boxer who can steal swing a $25M purse without getting hit a single time in 12 rounds and laugh it up post-fight with Larry Merchant, all the while convincing *knowledgeable* boxing fans that the event was legitimate, will always have the love and respect of Boyle Heights barrio dwellers.

And it’s also comforting to note that Oscar would never, ever conspire with an opponent to set up a scenario in which neither suffered a scratch while both, thanks to a soon to be announced rematch, will ultimately double their money.

No wonder boxing fans are resting easy today, knowing that the integrity of the sport remains as strong as it has ever been - and that it’s safe from the UFC Barbarians at the Gate.

But don’t take my word for it that boxing is as strong as ever - take the word of all the gigantic celebrities who were on hand for the scam fight last weekend. Like Flavor Flav and Thomas Hearns:

An apparently anklet-free Jim Lampley and lightly comatosed Larry Merchant:

And everyone’s favorite dirty ol’ man(ager):

I can only imagine that as the owner of the largest lesbian porn collection on the West Coast, Tommy Lasorda no doubt must’ve been awed Saturday night watching a lesbian survive 12 grueling rounds in the ring with the *heavy-handed* Floyd Mayweather, Jr.

SOMETIMES WRONG IS RIGHT - WHEN YOU’RE JIM LAMPLEY: Awful Announcing tracks down a brand-new apology from Jim Lampley, who was recently beat down by a San Diego County Judge for violating a restraining order against a girlfriend who accused him of domestic violence.

After the judge sentenced Lampley to probation and and a 52-week domestic violence rehab program (ack!), he quipped. “The thing that I am most guilty of is choosing (the) wrong woman.”

Not surprisingly, Lamps is now all lawyered up, with this new spiffy spin: “I am offering my full and unconditional apology to Miss Sanders and her family, as well as to all my friends, family and professional colleagues who have been unwarrantedly damaged by the events of that night.

Does that mean sales of the George Foreman grill have plummeted? Or Larry Merchant’s movie career is on the wane?

And we’re all hoping against hope that this isn’t also the reason Harold Lederman was passed over as a ringside judge for the latest Cruiserweight title bout at the Golden Nugget.

Lamps, you should be ashamed of yourself!

So you have Miss California 2003 in a California apartment on New Years Eve… Would you hit it?

Well, Jim Lampley did.

LAMPS SUFFERS LOW BLOW: If you thought I have previously plumbed the deepest depths of sports-related tasteless humor in this space, you would be wrong, sir.

TMZ.com reports that Jim Lampley was recently arrested felony domestic abuse. Lampley was also once married to TV newscaster Bree Walker, who was born with deformed hands.

The comments area of the TMZ reportage of the Lampley abuse story wrought this caustic crack:

Jim Lampley is a little touchy these days.

The HBO boxing announcer, still smarting over the Barrera-Juarez fiasco last weekend, called into Dave Smith’s KMPC-AM talk show in L.A. twice on Monday to address Smith’s skewering of HBO boxing *experts* Harold Lederman and Larry Merchant.

While stopping short of a shoutfest, Lampley sparred with Smith after the KMPC host said that over the years, Lederman and Merchant consistently have completely different scorecards than the vast majority of ringside observers (press and otherwise).

In other words, HBO hacks score the fight based on which fighter network executives want to win.

The LOS ANGELES TIMES reports a "fear that shoe companies will cease giving money to schools because NBA players are more effective billboards."

Adidas shoe guru Sonny Vaccaro: "That day is coming, and we’ll let the NCAA pay the bills for shoes and gear. I don’t need the schools in Florida when I have Tracy McGrady to wrap up the whole state."

If that day ever comes, it’ll be the best thing to happen to college hoops.

©
- MAY 7, 2003

Jim Rome set sail on his "maiden voyage" yesterday as he launched his new TV show on ESPN.

Highlight from the lid-lifter: Panelist Jim Lampley intimating that the pay-for-porn option on Mike Price’s hotel room TV may have cost the Bama coach his gig.

The NEW YORK POST reports HBO’s "righteous stance" about on-camera promos for an adult magazine’s (Perfect 10) website during it’s boxing telecasts rings hollow after a "recent issue of that same, HBO-offending skin mag featured an interview with HBO’s lead boxing voice, Jim Lampley."

Phil Mushnick of the NEW YORK POSTS asks, “Are the lives of pro football and baseball players more important than those of, say, pro wrestlers?”
He wonders why Congress has taken such great interest in steroid use in the NFL and MLB, while ignoring similarly admired and emulated performers who already have a long history of dropping dead at young ages.
After all, the “sport” may be fake. But the death certificates are real.
Also from Mushnick: After Jim Lampley warned HBO viewers that boxer Jon Ruiz’s corner can produce more profanities than most TV viewers and boxing fans are accustomed to, Larry Merchant quipped, “Not if you’re watching Deadwood.”

-