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• Erin Andrews spends the NFL Draft surrounded by Cosbys (Quan & Dr. Bill, respectively), and hilarity ensues.
(Can’t you just feel the excitement?)
• Jacoby Ellsbury steals home, Red Sox steal three straight from Yankees.
• It seems that NASCAR won’t be happy until somebody gets killed.
• Beer pong? Budweiser wants in on the upcoming table tennis craze.
• Kobe wanted complete creative control over Spike Lee’s day-in-the-life documentary about him.
You had your fun, Red Sox haters, when Boston was 2-6 and looking like a mediocre mess. Now, the Sox have won 10 straight and look like the team to beat in the AL East (can Toronto really keep this up?). The Yankees found three different ways to lose to the Sox over the weekend, and were further embarrassed when Jacoby Ellsbury stole home off of Andy Pettite:
Ellsbury’s theft highlighted a three-run fifth inning that led the Red Sox to a 4-1 win on Sunday Night Baseball. It was the weekend in a nutshell for the Yankees, who are now facing mounting questions about their pitching staff, which is ruining things for an offense that’s scoring more than five runs per game (and will get better when A-Rod returns).
So, you’re the Orlando Magic, you’re down 2-1 in the series to heavy underdog Philly, and you just dumped a nine-point lead late in the fourth quarter and find yourself tied in the final seconds. You don’t want this going to OT because the Sixers have all the momentum. So now what? Clearly, it’s time for Hedo Turkoglu to just dribble around for a while and then drain a 26-footer to win it 84-81:
Just how you drew it up, right Stan?
In Houston, the Portland Trail Blazers once again had a chance to steal a game from the Rockets…and once again, gave it away late. The Rockets killed the Blazers on the offensive boards, getting two huge second chances that led to three-point daggers from Shane Battier in the final minutes. Portland still had a chance to tie it with 20 seconds remaining, but Brandon Roy was called for an offensive foul, then Travis Outlaw missed a deep three. The Rockets held on, 89-88, to take a 3-1 series lead. Houston needs just one more game to advance to the second round for the first time since 1997. And, unfortunately for Blazer fans, Tracy McGrady isn’t around to blow this one.
(How does his hair stay behind his ears all the time like that?)
In the NHL’s late game, the Hurricanes blanked the Devils 4-0 to push their series to a deciding game in Newark on Tuesday night. In related news, NHL.COM has told Kevin Smith he can’t blog about the series on their site anymore. Apparently, the NHL wants to be “family friendly” and didn’t realize they had commissioned one of the filthiest mouths anywhere to write about the series. So now, Smith has moved his playoff blog to his own site.
• The Broncos, along with all of the former AFL teams, are going to wear throwback jerseys for the first two games this season. No, not those orange ones we all remember from our youth. It’s this monstrosity that thankfully was retired after only two seasons (according to the DENVER POST, they were acquired secondhand from a defunct bowl game):
• Man, the Royals even suck in India.
• PRO FOOTBALL TALK notes that Mike Singletary confirmed yesterday that ex-Ball State quarterback Nate Davis has dyslexia. The 49ers still drafted him anyway.
• Amputee Kyle Maynard, who we’ve mentioned a few times here on SbB, lost in his MMA debut last night in Alabama. But he did last the full three rounds. FIGHT REPORT has all the details, including some video.
• The Caps drilled the Rangers 5-3 yesterday to send their series to a seventh game, but Rangers fans like THE MANIC RANGER are incensed that Donald Brashear got away with crushing an unsuspecting Blair Betts at center ice in the first period. See for yourself. It was pretty much a cheap shot, and if Game 7 gets out of hand either way, expect Brashear to get lit up by somebody:
• BUGS AND CRANKS thinks Ozzie Smith was copping a feel on Alyssa Milano’s sideboob at the 2007 All-Star festivities.
• ESPN called on Erin Andrews to moderate the historic Quan Cosby-Bill Cosby summit at the NFL Draft. Yalta can rest easy, though. As you can see, it mostly involved Quan talking on his phone while Bill babbled incoherently and tried to put on his old Temple helmet:
• MJD over at YAHOO! SPORTS says the Bengals obviously are still not all that concerned about character, judging by their early draft picks.
• Seahawks LB Leroy Hill failed in his attempt to have his franchise tag removed by the team by getting arrested for pot possession. But now the ‘Hawks have drafted Aaron Curry, so Hill has been cut loose. That whole staged arrest seems like a waste of time now, eh, Leroy?
• This may not be sports-related, but lets face it, Bea Arthur was twice the man that A-Rod will ever be. So in honor of her sad demise, here’s some grainy footage of her embarrassing performance in the horrible Star Wars Holiday Special:
So they handed out a bunch of awards last night, and frankly, we don’t care. Until the “Academy” lifts their de facto ban on nominating sports movies with animals as the lead, we’re boycotting the Oscars and we think you ought to as well.
(Sweeping the Oscars in our hearts.)
And as if you needed further proof, The Wrestler, which was probably the best sports movie since Air Bud 2: Golden Receiver Rudy, was snubbed entirely by the Academy last night, as traditional Oscar-bait roles like “impoverished underexposed foreign minority” and “socially stigmatized overachiever” took center stage for the 90 millionth year in a row. But for Mickey Rourke and us, we’ll always have his exuberant speech from the Spirit Awards, which features insanely NSFW speech.
Oh yeah, he definitely did roids.
And there was one other nice sports moment at the Academy Awards: Will Smith, tripping over some pedestrian-at-best lines from the teleprompter, goes boom:
(Click here if, lord forbid, you don’t get it.)
(”Nope, I see nothing wrong with 30 shots and 5 assists.”)
But back in the real world, we had another big individual performance: Dwyane Wade dropping 50 on the Magic. One problem–none of the rest of the Heat decided to show up, and Orlando ended up blowing Miami out, 122-99. Dwight Howard was the man for the Magic once again with 32 and 17… and this 75-foot shot, which didn’t count but makes me feel like it somehow should have. If you needed more evidence that going Berzerker like this was actually a bad idea on Wade’s part, the Heat are now 0-4 when Wade scores at least 44 points. The Eastern Conference is dutifully taking notes on giving D-Wade the long jumper all night long.
(Welcome back, man! But about those cornrows…)
And speaking of notes for the Eastern Conference, Delonte West is back for the Cleveland Cavaliers, and that is bad, bad news for everyone else. The Cavs dispatched the Pistons, 99-78, in a game that wasn’t really that close at all; the Cavs led 67-34 at the break (!!!) and coasted to a jarringly easy win. West led all scorers with 25 points, including a 5-5 performance behind the arc.
Some more quick links to peruse while you face full life consequences…
• Matt Mosley of ESPN’s HASHMARKS notes what the biggest reaction was to the finalization of the Pacman-To-Cowboys trade: “Patrons of Dallas strip clubs were spotted running for the exits.”
• The SOUTH FLORIDA SUN SENTINEL checks in to see how well the Orange Bowl demolition is going.
• Taking a cue from the K.C. Royals, EVERY DAY SHOULD BE SATURDAY makes a date with the Oregon Ducks’ O-Line and their new calendar.
• Comedian Chris Elliott laces up with the New York Rangers. Man, we sure miss “Get A Life“.
• A former Bengal confirms that Ocho Cinco went muy loco during a playoff game and slugged coach Marvin Lewis.
• Chinese officials claim that the Dalai Lama wants to disrupt the Beijing Olympics. So he’s got that going for him, which is nice.
• Pat Riley wants to reimburse Heat fans for the team’s horrendous play. Maybe he can borrow some dough from Carl Pohlad.
Men’s magazine editors across the good ol’ U.S.A. have jumped on the Red Sox bandwagon by selecting the two most photogenic Boston players and photographing the hell out of them. Jacoby Ellsbury and Josh Beckett have been fighting for the worst sunburn related to flash photography since last season’s Series triumph.
(Ellsbury’s World Series bonus went towards a big damned truck, apparently.)
As OUT IN CENTER FIELD notes, Ellsbury’s SI featurette was just the latest salvo in the War on Q Ratings. Beckett was on the cover of MEN’S FITNESS. (No snickering.) Ellsbury was in a spread in MEN’S VOGUE. (Seriously? There’s a men’s version of Vogue now? Can we get Justin Timberlake to cover Madonna?) However, these men’s magazines aren’t really thinking about the big picture.
• Who needs the Heisman? AOL FANHOUSE feels the love, as West Virginia QB Pat White receives some amore from Erin Andrews:
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• The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS double-takes while they double-dribble, as a high school fires its basketball coach - for being too good.
• YAHOO! NEWS gets a case of poison ivy, as a Cubs couple names their son “Wrigley Fields“.
• YOU BEEN BLINDED needs your vote in deciding who graces the cover of the next EA NFL game:
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• The VANCOUVER PROVINCE gets a kick from the city council, who tells ultimate fighters to take off, hosers.
• THE GHOSTS OF WAYNE FONTES keeps a buckeye on Ohio State, who’s flying under the radar this season.
• POPJOCKS checks their spelling, as “Rord” is the word for this A-Rod fan:
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• Turns out it was all a misunderstanding, as the ARIZONA REPUBLIC reports that Notre Dame is 4-0. Honestly.
• Speaking of the Fighting-for-their-lives Irish, we wonder how well this book is selling right now.
• STEROID NATION tells how the East Germans thought it “logical” to treat their Olympic athletes with Supertramp and Springsteen during their “glory days“:
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• BUGS AND CRANKS knows the Yankees’ bullpen is getting a lot of game experience - which might not be a good thing.
• CURT’S BLOODY SOCK lives up to its subtitle, as they obsessively and possesively over-analyze this nice catch by Boston’s Jacoby Ellsbury.
